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Funny satire stories about Clarence Thomas

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Funny story: Prisoner # 8675309

Prisoner # 8675309

To paraphrase Tommy Tutone, “Ginny Ginny, where can you turn to?” Of course, Ginny Thomas has a big important husband who commits crimes and judges crimes of others, but not of himself, (and that’s what makes him great!), so she can always rely on…

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Funny story: GOP Racy Female Calendar To Raise Money For 2024 Campaign

GOP Racy Female Calendar To Raise Money For 2024 Campaign

The GOP is going all out to raise money for the Presidential race of 2024 - fairly sure Trump with his billions won't be financing anything - as he won't be the candidate. Clarence Thomas came up with the 'GOP Honeys of 2024', as a money-making…

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Funny story: The Latest Poll Shows That 76% of All Whites And 98% of All Blacks Hate Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas

The Latest Poll Shows That 76% of All Whites And 98% of All Blacks Hate Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas

CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The latest QuinniPinni Poll clearly shows that Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas is a very, very hated man. QuinniPinni showed that 76% of all white people hate him, and 98% of all black people hate him. The whites do…

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Funny story: Supreme Court rules that good ol’ boys can march through black neighborhoods dressed as ghosts on Halloween

Supreme Court rules that good ol’ boys can march through black neighborhoods dressed as ghosts on Halloween

In another stunning pile of stupidity the US Supreme Court ruled by a majority that good ol’ boys are allowed to parade through areas of America inhabited by people of color, sporting ghost outfits and carrying lit torches. Ghost suits were previo…

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Funny story: Extra! Extra! Clarence Thomas is Really Jabba the Hutt!

Extra! Extra! Clarence Thomas is Really Jabba the Hutt!

A secret Jedi Master at Disney Studios and Lucas Film has divulged that Supreme Court “Justice” Clarence Thomas is actually ... Jabba the Hutt! Just as Jabba liked to own Princess Leia in that hot golden bikini lingerie, so too does Clarence “Clar…

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Funny story: Maybe Trump Should Have Pardoned The Justice's Wife Before Leaving The White House?

Maybe Trump Should Have Pardoned The Justice's Wife Before Leaving The White House?

Wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, Ginni Thomas was trying to overturn the 2020 presidential election. But, of course, trying to overturn an election is a delicate pickle for the wife of a Supreme Court Justice. Booyah! No small p…

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Funny story: Supreme Court Rules Sex Organs Can Be Used To Determine Gender

Supreme Court Rules Sex Organs Can Be Used To Determine Gender

BILLINGSGATE POST: Thank God for President Trump! In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court ruled that sex organs can be used to determine one’s gender. While conventional sex theories, held sacred since Adam and Eve discovered each other's inter-joinin…

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Funny story: Ruth Bader Ginsburg Corrects “No Ho” Limerick Decision

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Corrects “No Ho” Limerick Decision

BILLINGSGATE POST: After receiving a blistering call from Associate Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, who wrote the majority ruling referred to below, the editors of the BILLINGSGATE POST stand corrected. In the original limerick published e...

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Funny story: Where’s Ruthie? Ginsburg’s Dead, But Nobody Knows It

Where’s Ruthie? Ginsburg’s Dead, But Nobody Knows It

BILLINGSGATE POST: In the National Lampoon’s movie “Vacation,” the deceased corpse of Aunt Edna toured the USA tied to the rack of a 1979 Ford LTD driven by Clark Griswold in the family’s iconic vacation trip to Wally World. Where’s Ruthie? The...

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Funny story: Where’s Waldo Ginsburg? She Can Hide, But She Can't Run

Where’s Waldo Ginsburg? She Can Hide, But She Can't Run

BILLINGSGATE POST: If you thought it was difficult to find Waldo, trying to find Ruthie is even harder. There are those who claim she is dead; that the Democrats are hiding her passing so that Trump can’t replace her with a conservative. Slim Eve...

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Funny story: Kavanaugh Denies Pushing Ginsburg

Kavanaugh Denies Pushing Ginsburg

Washington, DC - Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh denied pushing fellow Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, 85, who suffered three fractured ribs in an apparent fall. Justice Ginsburg does not recall how the injury occurred. Police are investigating.

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Funny story: Judge Kavanaugh Presses Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start, Gets 30 Lives

Judge Kavanaugh Presses Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start, Gets 30 Lives

WASHINGTON D.C. - In a shocking development, Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh plugged an NES controller into his gavel and entered the infamous "Konami code" (Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start), granting him a grand total...

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Funny story: SCOTUS: Jurors must justify their deliberations

SCOTUS: Jurors must justify their deliberations

WHITEWASHINGTON, DC -- In a God-like pronouncement, the US Supreme Court ruled, by a 5-3 vote, that jurors are no longer allowed to deliberate in secret. Now, to prevent "prejudice" and "bias" in trials involving illegal aliens or other "protected...

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Funny story: Judicial Branch Implodes over Bias Issue

Judicial Branch Implodes over Bias Issue

Washington, DC: Hundreds of judges resigned today and more resignations are expected amid recent bias claims by U.S. Presidential candidate Donald Trump. At press time, seventy judges of Mexican heritage have already resigned, and other judges who...

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Funny story: Poetic Justice: Supreme Court Rules Ted Cruz A Virtual Non-Entity

Poetic Justice: Supreme Court Rules Ted Cruz A Virtual Non-Entity

BILLINGSGATE POST: Not since April of 2010 has the Supreme Court issued a decision in the form of a limerick. Historically, The High Court of Scotland started this procedure back in the 1262 in order to keep an over-supply of poetic justices occupie...

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Funny story: KKK: Underground Rap A-OK, but ONLY Underground Rap.

KKK: Underground Rap A-OK, but ONLY Underground Rap.

The Ku Klux Klan has made a somewhat peculiar (and not necessarily entirely sincere?) attempt to find black supporters and allies. They have stated that they prefer underground rap to mainstream gangster rap, as the following highly authentic and...

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Funny story: Science and Technolgy : 1 - FAA : 0

Science and Technolgy : 1 - FAA : 0

WHITEWASHINGTON, DC -- In dismissing a U. S. Federal Aviation Agency (FAA) lawsuit against a drone "pilot," a federal judge has, in effect, given the okay to the non-commercial aerial transportation of goods. "They have a right to fly the friendl...

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