If you've ever enjoyed the pleasure of riding a donkey, you'll understand the current craze sweeping through the resident population of one English town, where things are never quite as they seem. Donkey riding has become the preferred free-time a...
Hello, I am Brian Asshat, esquire of the parish of Chutney on The Fritz, protector of the English language, spotter of trains, and bell ringer, and I have just one question for you: Are you excited at the Archer's Pantomime this year? I am not...
Famed grammar nazi, pedant, and grumpy old git Brian Asshat has revealed, to nobody's great surprise, that, due to the price of stamps, he will not be sending out any Christmas cards. He told us, 'I know a lot of people, but I don't like most of t...
Mog and Tiddles, two neighbouring cats at The Green, Chutney on the Fritz have met to discuss their respective owners. Mr Brown, a seventy year old widower is Mog’s caretaker, whilst Mrs Smith, a 68 year old divorcee looks after Tiddles, and the t...
Councillors in Chutney on the Fritz have met, at tax-payers expense to discuss the possibility of organising another meeting about the number of meetings they have. Councillor Money-Tree told us, ‘Yes, it is true. Whilst most normal people would h...
Ray Winstone Smythe shocked a small gathering at his local pub, the King’s Left Elbow in Chutney on the Fritz, after playing some Ragtime on the pub’s old guitar, and putting the instrument back on its stand. Onlooker Chunky Jumper said ‘It was ve...
There was consternation in Chutney on the Fritz when a fairly decent writer, who doesn't bang on about his poetry on social media turned up for the Words Matter poetry night in the King's Bottom on Wednesday night. Deirdre Rhyming Couplet from the...
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