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Funny satire stories about Chemical Warfare

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Funny story: Raskolnikov contacted in Hades comments on Boris Johnson’s Easter Speech

Raskolnikov contacted in Hades comments on Boris Johnson’s Easter Speech

Mr. Johnson’s Easter Speech and his reference to Dostoevsky has drawn considerable interest in Lower Bowel 4A Division, Continental Hades. (Wikipedia explains that "Lower Bowel" was originally "Lower Bower" and somehow changed over the course of t...

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Funny story: Here Comes "Hyper-Removal"

Here Comes "Hyper-Removal"

The US Government on advice from the CIA have coined a new word 'HYPER-REMOVAL". CIA Director Kant Giffafuck said: "The word is a sister of "Overkill" which is now common parlance and has more or less the same work to do. We have ordered our PR Agenc...

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Funny story: Nasal Warfare. Not to be Sneezed At.

Nasal Warfare. Not to be Sneezed At.

Magazine "Hollywood Insiders" says the NOSE will be the media focus of body attention in the next decade. This is to prepare everybody for the planned lethal virus that will be spread by the sneeze. Nose awareness will ensure the disaster will not be too unexpected. 'Depopulation' so-called (or mass-extermination for the non-poetic among you) is the call. The ground has already been laid by...

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Funny story: Syrian War Not Being Taken Syriously By Americans

Syrian War Not Being Taken Syriously By Americans

The American psyche sometimes goes through amazing changes. 12 years ago we couldn't wait to get our hands on that ultimate harbinger of evil Saddam Hussein and his dire WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION (GASP!!!!!!!) and to send his bad self to an early destiny with Hell (the Muslim one, not the Christian). Now, faced with a man just as repugnant who REALLY DOES HAVE WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION and H...

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Funny story: "Trust us!" with forefinger held high and a whole lot of churning going on

"Trust us!" with forefinger held high and a whole lot of churning going on

It is an absolute rule of administrations throughout the universe that "Trust us!" and the raised forefinger indicate a whole lot of churning going on inside the political brain. Trust me, on this, your roving reporter Pepe Warezabar trotting the globe into its nefarious and terrible hotspots. Once again I landed amidst a bubbling soup of world politics, this time in London at Club Divisad...

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Funny story: Credibility Blues on the Long Guns for Syria

Credibility Blues on the Long Guns for Syria

Anonymous inside sources to The White House have indicated "the credibility blues" for a strike on Syria have President Obama in a difficult pickle at this time. A long, thoughtful walk on White House grounds last Friday evening, accompanied by advisors, was reported highly fruitful, leading to new ideas for the strike on Syria. This conferencing occurred right before Mr. Obama's decision to s...

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Funny story: Chemical Warfare not Okay

Chemical Warfare not Okay

The use of chemicals against civilians in Syria has caused considerable controversy in the highest political echelons with the UN coming out in force to condemn it. Here are two comments worth considering. Said Lt.Col. Clement Mason, head of the US Military: "We have taught the world that it is okay to kill people in pursuit of monetary gain... and when it comes to feathering one's nest mo...

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Funny story: Scientists find sugar to be a bio-warfare agent

Scientists find sugar to be a bio-warfare agent

Bethesda Maryland - Sugar is not just toxic, as some have recently postulated; but Dr. Guerivarewus, who works in a secret lab, has proven that it is a bio-warfare agent designed to kill all animal life on Earth. As Dr. Guerivarewus has shown, pla...

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Funny story: Chemical Giant Introduces Harmless New "Agent O"

Chemical Giant Introduces Harmless New "Agent O"

DETROIT - A chemical giant has unveiled their newest campaign to introduce a gentle new version of the infamous 1960's herbicide Agent Orange. Sexy Hooter's waitress Bali Banks has signed on to lead the "chemical girls" who will attend chemical...

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Funny story: Fumes Apparatus Reveal Taliban

Fumes Apparatus Reveal Taliban

Scientists have made a breakthrough in electronic odour perception...in an attempt to produce an electronic drug sniffer, they discovered that whereas synthetic chemical odours were difficult to detect, human body odours, particularly flatulence, reg...

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Funny story: Iran Scientists Develop Camel Flu Virus

Iran Scientists Develop Camel Flu Virus

In Iran some scientists who have been working in a secret laboratory for a year have finished the development of a new and very dangerous form of a virus which they have called Camel Flu. The virus has been given the chemical name H1N1C. It has...

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Funny story: Boots Accused Of "High Street Chemical Warfare"

Boots Accused Of "High Street Chemical Warfare"

Pharmaceutical giant Boots the Chemist has today denied claims that they are using underhand methods to attract customers.

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