The Spoof's Brussels correspondent, Plagny Toxique, has received a copy of French President Macron's secret Brexit plans after a UK government warning that Dover and other Channel ports face disruption of up to six months if the UK leaves the EU with...
"Good work #3," said a disgustingly familiar voice that made my skin crawl. "Just as I asked you to do," said Mark, as he leveled a 357 magnum and silencer at me. "I'm not #3," said #4, "Remember? I'm number 7." "Tcch," said Mark clicking his tongue,"OHHHHH yes! Sorry my dear. Well, you've done well bringing me this naughty boy. Oh, don't look at her sooo disappointed, JLF, she's never love...
Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach Infiltration Army) special demographic upheaval reporter, Sir Bob Subterranean-Blues-Witherspoon, spent a filthy night under the English Channel observing an Exodus (Bob Marley intro please) of True Brits flooding the Chann...
With thousands of desperate migrants attempting to enter the UK through the channel tunnel, UKIP have come up with a number of ideas designed to make the problem go away. In a press conference this morning, UKIP's immigration spokesman, Ozzy Mosle...
In a move of breathtaking brilliance, the Community Secretary Eric Pickles today put down his pie and announced the initiative to save the Thames Valley from further flood damage. 'The Environment Agency will henceforth direct their hoses down the...
South Coast - Passengers likened the 8am tremor to 'Mile High Club fallout on steroids' as an earthquake struck the English Channel today. "It turned my skinny latte into a foaming frappé-cino," Eurotunnel traveller Mrs Doris Lump said. "The t...
A senior executive of Eurostar was yesterday rushed to hospital with his wife following a freak accident at home. Roger McHunt, the Chief Financial Officer of Eurostar had been making love to his wife Valerie in the early hours when he experienced...
Hundreds of holiday travelers going between mainland Europe and Britain were stranded in the Chunnel for six hours as their train was surrounded by Giant Chunnel Rats, authorities now confirm. The vicious rodents circled the train, gnawing at the pai...
Eurostar came to a halt in the Channel Tunnel and thousands of passangers stranded for hours. A team of expert investigators located the cause of the mulfunction in the driver's cabin. A temperature sensor was blocked by the driver's onions. The...
On May 6, 2009, the largest party ever, celebrating a tunnel, will be held in Folkestone, England in honor of the Channel Tunnel's 15th anniversary. Still the world's longest tunnel beneath a body of water, the Chunnel connects Great Britain to mainl...
English Channel - (X-Files Mess): An unidentified flying object was seen hurtling into the Channel Tunnel rail track chasing an unmarked goods train minutes before a mysterious fire erupted seven miles from the Calais terminus. Locals claimed the...
Near disaster in the channel tunnel was averted earlier today, when a lorry carrying highly flammable materials, burst into flames. Under normal circumstances, vehicles carrying flammable liquids are not allowed entry to the tunnel, but the lorry...
LONDON - The Channel Tunnel will be closed indefinitely for major reinforcement, Eurotunnel operators announced today. Eurotunnel engineers said the work is necessary to prevent foreseeable damage to the "Chunnel," as it was once popularly...
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