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Funny satire stories about Breakfast

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Funny story: Pastry Chef's Daughter Secretly Yearns to Be Gluten-Free

Pastry Chef's Daughter Secretly Yearns to Be Gluten-Free

Amanda Carlyle, eldest daughter of world-renowned pastry chef Leo Carlyle, recently revealed that even though finely ground white flour has been her family's bread and butter for generations, she secretly yearns to be gluten-free. "I have these vi...

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Funny story: Cereal Killer Terrorizes Suburban Indianapolis

Cereal Killer Terrorizes Suburban Indianapolis

A cereal killer who's been nicknamed the "Bowl Over Boy" has been terrorizing households in suburban Indianapolis in recent weeks, raiding pantries, rifling through cabinets, and leaving no cereal in the Indianapolis metro area, whether whole-grain...

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Funny story: Nonchalant Nashville Vegan Makes Plant-Based Living Look Like a Breeze

Nonchalant Nashville Vegan Makes Plant-Based Living Look Like a Breeze

In a city famous for hot chicken, barbecue, and buttermilk biscuits with gravy, nonchalant Nashville vegan Kenny Felton has been turning heads not only for successfully sticking to his plant-based diet, but for making it look like an absolute breeze.

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Funny story: Man Furious Over Burnt Corn Flakes

Man Furious Over Burnt Corn Flakes

A man eating his breakfast cereal was up in arms this morning after finding two burnt Corn Flakes in his bowl for the second day in succession. Moys Kenwood, 54, revealed how he opened a brand new box of Kellogg's Corn Flakes yesterday morning, a...

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Funny story: Chickens Strike After McDonald's Announces All Day Breakfast

Chickens Strike After McDonald's Announces All Day Breakfast

Shares of McDonald's stock fell 18% after traders learned that the recently introduced all-day breakfast menu was causing serious labor problems for the world's largest restaurant chain. Trading was hectic on the big board, driven primarily by i...

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Funny story: ISIS claims responsibility for your spilled milk this morning

ISIS claims responsibility for your spilled milk this morning

Militant Islamist group, ISIS released a statement this morning claiming responsibility for acts that will certainly interrupt your daily routine. "We will strike you when you least expect it, when you are most vulnerable, when you are still rubbi...

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Funny story: More schools to offer breakfast in bed

More schools to offer breakfast in bed

WASHINGTON, DC - President Barack Obama signed an Executive Order today, mandating that schools offer breakfast in bed for disadvantaged students. When the school bell rings, many children file into classrooms and open their textbooks. Increasingl...

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Funny story: Survey Shows 80% of People Will Not Be Told To Eat Porridge By Conservatives

Survey Shows 80% of People Will Not Be Told To Eat Porridge By Conservatives

Lady Jenkin's speech telling poor people to eat the disgusting sloppy prison fodder known as porridge fell on deaf ears yesterday. The peer told the press conference, which was attended by the Pope and the archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, t...

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Funny story: Hatfield-McCoy Feud Reignited Over Breakfast Buffet

Hatfield-McCoy Feud Reignited Over Breakfast Buffet

Catlettsburg, KY - After 125 years of peace, the legendary Hatfield-McCoy family feud was reignited yesterday at the Catlettsburg Day's Inn off Highway 60. During the hotel's complimentary breakfast buffet, Davie Hatfield, the great-great-great-g...

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Funny story: Price of Mini Wheats will rise due to 'added iron'

Price of Mini Wheats will rise due to 'added iron'

BATTLE CREEK, Michigan (ABSNN) - The proposed recall of Frosted Mini Wheats was cancelled today according to long-time breakfast spokesman Tony the Tiger. Speaking before a group of food reporters, Tony admitted "that metal fragments had been fo...

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Funny story: Fresh Guidelines on Breakfast Cereals

Fresh Guidelines on Breakfast Cereals

The Dietary Information Panel (DIP) has now revised its advice related to breakfast cereals. Rather than eating any number of large bowls of porridge and any number of smaller bowls of Sugary Puffs or Chocky Pops at any one sitting it now recomme...

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Funny story: Masterchef contestant disqualified for his unorthodox dish

Masterchef contestant disqualified for his unorthodox dish

Masterchef contestant, Wayne Pipe, has been unceremoniously dumped from the show despite winning, when it discovered that he had bought his signature dish from a supermarket. In his place, runner up Eve Guttering will go through to the next round.

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Funny story: Archaeologists Discover French Toast Flavored Pop-Tarts

Archaeologists Discover French Toast Flavored Pop-Tarts

NEVADA-In what is already being hailed around the world as the find of the century, a team of archaeologists in Nevada have discovered the previously believed-to-be-extinct flavor of French Toast Pop-Tarts on a local grocery store shelf. Dr. Doug...

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Funny story: Radio 2 controller: We don't want Chris Moyles

Radio 2 controller: We don't want Chris Moyles

BBC Radio 2 controller Bob Shannon has sparked controversy at the Beeb by saying the network he controls do not want motormouth Chris Moyles when he is pensioned off from the Radio 1 breakfast show. In an interview with the Media Guardian, Radio 1...

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Funny story: Hillary Clinton to Convert US Embassies into IHOPs

Hillary Clinton to Convert US Embassies into IHOPs

Washington DC -- Secretary Of State Hillary Clinton has begun transforming her diplomatic corp's global network of embassies and consulates into the world's largest International House of Pancakes chain. "Let's face it, there are major problems in...

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Funny story: Christine Bleakley and Adrian Chiles Axed From Daybreak - Not Enough Says TV Repair Man

Christine Bleakley and Adrian Chiles Axed From Daybreak - Not Enough Says TV Repair Man

The show has been a problem for ITV since it was launched in September 2010, receiving appallingly low ratings. Bleakley and Chiles were poached from BBC's The One Show earlier this year in a bid to improve Daybreak's fortunes. The move failed and...

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Funny story: Britain's favourite meal is... Brunch!

Britain's favourite meal is... Brunch!

The UK is going bonkers for brunch according to a new survey. 42% of Brits no longer eat breakfast while a staggering 98% have taken up the mid-morning meal instead to save time. Kate Tin of Durex who ran the poll explained the findings 'People...

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