New York City’s most popular mayor of all time has made an announcement that he has come up with a plan to cut the city’s crime rate in half. Addressing the press on the steps of the state house, mayor Bill de Blasio said the following: “Okay, ev…
New York City, NY - (Cheapskates): Low income New Yorkers traveling on half-price MetroCards will soon be herded into using newly-installed subway train poor doors, according to a City Hole press release. The roll-out of Mayor Bill de Blasio’s mas...
BILLINGSGATE POST: CNN announced today that Fredo Cuomo will conduct a Townhouse debate with New York Mayor Bill De Blasio and Montana Governor Steve Bullock, that will take place in a three-holer outhouse in Butte, Montana. Crowd control measures...
BILLINGSGATE POST: After turning down offers to visit the White House and the International House of Pancakes, the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team accepted an offer from Jeffrey Epstein to visit his mansion in New York City. A ticker-tape parade through...
After failing to follow through on the promise he made on the day he took mayoral office in 2014, to eliminate New York City's cruel and archaic carriage horse industry, Mayor Bill de Blasio has vowed to bring every last NYC carriage horse with him t...
BILLINGSGATE POST: Revolving fire hydrants: Sounds like a “can’t miss” solution to The Big Apple’s dog emission problem. Now that Mayor De Blasio has become the latest mutt to join the 20 or more dogs throwing their collars into the ring as De...
New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio proudly announced that according to a recent U.S. News and World Report study, the Big Apple is only the nation's fifth-worst major city to live in, comfortably edging out hellholes like Fresno, Stockton, Modesto, a...
BILLINGSGATE POST: When Mayor De Blasio ordered City Park Superintendent, Detrick "Dirty Tricks" Detwiler, to replace all of the old fire hydrants along Fifth Avenue and Central Park, he had no idea of the uproar this would cause. Because he though...
New York - NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio will be Hillary Clinton's 2016 running mate according to a secret deal forged by the Reverend Al Sharpton. De Blasio is sitting pretty as a firm 3/1 favorite to become Hillary's slave - ah, Veep! - after pushing...
New York - A cartoon of New York Mayor Bill de Blasio sporting demonic canine eyes has appeared on the Ecuadorian president's website marking the country's National Pet Appreciation Day. De Blasio, 69, is portrayed as a demented Scottish Terrier l...
New York - The Mayor of New York has been left hopping mad after falling for a classic 'Blizzard-of-the-Century' scam. Bill de Blasio shit down - oh, shut down - most of New York City on Monday night after the Snowmageddon card from the Major Arca...
New York - The latest sequel in the wildly successful Police Academy movie series is being shot in New York City under the direction of big screen legend the Reverend Al Sharpton. Starring NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio the opening scene was being filme...
New York - An Israeli impostor who wowed the world with a selection of random sign language rants at Nelson Mandela's televised funeral last year has surfaced again - at an Ebola conference in New York this weekend chaired by Mayor Bill de Blasio.
Brooklyn - New York's mayoral family the de Blasios have been driven from their Park Slope home by an infestation of venomous spiders that fell from the roof space and burst out of the bathroom walls. They've hunkered down at the official NYC mayo...
New York - The Mayor of New York is getting a fat $50,000 check to be the keynote speaker at next week's Labour Party Conference in Manchester, UK. Bill de Blasio's first class plane tickets, hotel suite and out of pocket expenses will also be rei...
New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio recently made political history by announcing that free universal pre-kindergarten will now be available to all four-year-old children - and to retired New York City carriage horses of any age. Citing the cruel a...
The slogan? Buy beautiful blinders! The horses became entrepreneurs when Mayor Bill de Blasio indicated his dislike for the horse-and-carriage trade. Faced with losing their jobs, the NYC horses galloped onto another endeavor. After years of be...
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