Secret Service agents feared the worst but they finally located President Biden after an exhaustive five hour search. Things looked bleak when they found no trace of the president after a second pass through every room in the White House but he f…
People who read misleading news articles have an increased risk of dementia, according to research that adds to concerns about the impact of the news media on the nation's mental health. Roughly one in 10 cases of Alzheimer’s in urban areas could…
A man who thought he had misplaced his reading spectacles and looked all over his house for them, is celebrating this evening after they subsequently turned up safe and sound - on his head! Moys Kenwood, 56, spent his evening between playing with...
The former cyclist Lance Armstrong has reacted angrily to allegations that he was the first man to walk on the Moon. Armstrong, now 47, won the Tour de France an unprecedented seven times in succession between 1999 and 2005, before being exposed a...
Members of Lord Janner's family are reported to be very pleased about the news that a cure for Altzeimers disease has been discovered. The latest discovery comes just in time for Lord Janner to clear his name in an open trial of all suggestions th...
Have bong, get frying pan, wonder why your holding frying pan and put back. Have bong, turn on stove, feel sure you got frying pan out ready to cook, get frying pan its not there. Have bong, get dry mouth, go to fridge to get glass of milk, find frying pan put frying pan away in correct cupboard. Have bong, wonder why stove is on turn off, wonder why glass of milk is on counter? and repeat. And...
A man was last night convicted of the theft of a sofa belonging to his next-door neighbour, who suffers from Alzheimer's disease. Jez Bishop, 45, from Nottingham has been living the high life for years because he has been regularly stealing from h...
Give me a minute, I'll think of it - A new Alzheimer's support group is set to begin um sometime in uh April maybe or was it Uncle Herbert right after he got back from overseas? You know he never was the same I can't imagine the things he saw over th...
Has it ever occurred to you that dementia might be one of the most colorful and liberating phases of your life? Of course it hasn't -- because you aren't Elderly Girl! Who else would come up with such an outlandish proposition? Certainly not the pharmaceutical companies. Despite hundreds of billions in taxpayer dollars, their research has failed spectacularly to provide any real hope. Th...
The world finally learned today of a man who had misplaced his wife, Irene Bumblekiss, in the Liverpool address of one of his previous residences. After being questioned this morning the man said he'd completely forgotten about her and couldn't ev...
APALACHICOLA, Fla. - House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) today signed into a long-term Alzheimer's center long-established Arizona Senator John McCain. When asked why he did it, the terse and taciturn Boehner quipped, "It was a Republican thing to do.
Jackie LaTour, aka Jackie LaTour, was arrested late on Tuesday, for creating a disturbance at the Cracker Barrel on North fourth street. He, was creating a disturbance inside the store. blocking the entrances to both the Women's and the Men's restroo...
The removal of Ozzy Osborne's entire brain in recent ground-breaking 'Alzheimer Avoidance' surgery has been hailed as a stroke of genius. Neurosurgeons worldwide have called the audacious surgery - designed and implemented by Mr Adam Spoofery of Sa...
Thank god, bladder incontinence has become trendy. It's about time! Elderly Girl inspired billions of people to regard elderliness as alluring, sassy and brilliant. Now, hundreds of profit-mad companies have succumbed to her voluptuous wisdom by creating products that have turned 80-year-olds into the new hip-hop generation. She has urged the Obama Administration to award the Medal o...
The creator of Space 1999 and UFO, Gerry Anderson, has revealed he has Alzheimer's Disease. Mr Anderson was diagnosed 18 months ago but has spoken about it publicly for the first time after forgetting he was diagnosed with the disease. The 83...
Bertrum Wallins from the National Hemp Foundation was scheduled for a 9:00AM press conference yesterday in Washington D.C., but cancelled the event at the last minute. Insiders at the NHF say that Wallins had lost the actual report. Apparently una...
A skin patch to treat Alzheimer's and help jog people's memory is to be made available on the NHS after a five year battle. Exelon can be taken orally or worn as a patch. But the patch has been shown to reduce side effects such as nausea and vomit...
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