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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: Dunfermline Mascot Condemned After Stunt

Dunfermline Mascot Condemned After Stunt

Scottish First Division club Dunfermline Athletic have been slammed after their mascot "Sammy The Tammy" took to the field dressed as a tank and appeared to aim at rival fans before the top of the table clash at East End Park last Saturday. Former...

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Funny story: City Gun For Champions League Berth - Nobody Notices

City Gun For Champions League Berth - Nobody Notices

Manchester City made a clear declaration of intent last night as they went walkabout in the darkest wilds of Blackburn, beating aside all manner of attacks from woolly backed, flat cap and muffler wearing ferret toting Blackburnianites. It was just a football match. Nobody really bothered to tune in to Sky Sports to watch it because it clashed with Corrie and Ade Edmondson messing about with...

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Funny story: Fernando Torres Dedicates First Goal To Prince William And Kate Middleton Ahead Of Royal Wedding

Fernando Torres Dedicates First Goal To Prince William And Kate Middleton Ahead Of Royal Wedding

Chelsea striker Fernando Torres is in wonderland after scoring his first goal for the club in the 3-0 victory over West Ham at the weekend, and has dedicated the goal to Prince William and his bride-to-be Kate Middleton ahead of Friday's Royal Weddin...

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Funny story: Wenger Charged With Bringing Game Into Disrepute

Wenger Charged With Bringing Game Into Disrepute

Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger has been charged by the English Football Association with bringing the game into disrepute after the 2-1 defeat at the hands of Bolton Wanderers. The result, which almost certainly ended the London club's chances of o...

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Funny story: Shearer Stays Tight Lipped On Rumours

Shearer Stays Tight Lipped On Rumours

BBC Football pundit Alan Shearer is remaining tight lipped about rumours linking him with ITV sports presenter Gabby Logan. The former Newcastle United and England centre forward issued a "no comment" when approached by journalists outside the BBC...

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Funny story: Rangers Maul Celtic 0-0 To Close In On Runner-Up Spot

Rangers Maul Celtic 0-0 To Close In On Runner-Up Spot

Brotherly love was a commodity in distinctly short supply at Ibrox today, as Rangers hosted arch rivals Celtic in a typical Auld Firm blood and thunder, no quarter given or expected, encounter. The final meeting of the Glasgow giants this season.

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Funny story: Manchester United Purchased In Hostile Takeover

Manchester United Purchased In Hostile Takeover

Manchester United, an English soccer/football club that plays in the Premiere League, has been purchased in a hostile takeover. The club, which has played in Old Trafford, Greater Manchester for over 100 years, will be relocating to Mexico per the n...

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Funny story: Chicharito Strikes Again

Chicharito Strikes Again

A pretty one-sided affair this afternoon at Old Trafford, as Manchester United pounded the Everton goal remorselessly, and pretty much without reward as the boys in blue dug in. The Merseysiders successfully resisted wave after red shirted wave, a...

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Funny story: Arsenal's Andrey Arseshavin goes for full-on Brazilian

Arsenal's Andrey Arseshavin goes for full-on Brazilian

Emirates Stadium - New non-chafe shorts will have to be worn for a while, the Gunners midfielder told worried team mates today. Russian-born Arse-shavin has struggled to hold down the North London club's official kit which may have 'rubbed him up...

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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth Confirms That Manchester United's Chicharito And His Girlfriend Shakira Will Be Attending The Royal Wedding

Queen Elizabeth Confirms That Manchester United's Chicharito And His Girlfriend Shakira Will Be Attending The Royal Wedding

LONDON - As Queen Elizabeth continues to make the final preparations for the upcoming April 29 Royal Wedding she was asked by members of the press covering the highly prestigious event about some of the invited guests. The queen replied that out o...

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Funny story: Everton Plan To Put A Bomb Under United

Everton Plan To Put A Bomb Under United

Everton have revealed that they intend to blow Manchester United's title bid to smithereens when the clubs meet at Old Trafford over the Easter weekend. It appears that Everton are becoming aggrieved by media reports which suggest that the Merseys...

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Funny story: BBC 'United' Drama Unlikely To Be A Hit On Merseyside

BBC 'United' Drama Unlikely To Be A Hit On Merseyside

A BBC drama which depicts events surrounding the Munich air crash of 1958, in which 8 Manchester United players and several fellow passengers lost their lives, is unlikely to be very well received on Merseyside, a BBC insider admitted last night.

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Funny story: Drogba In Talks Over Future - United Set To Pounce

Drogba In Talks Over Future - United Set To Pounce

Didier Drogba's agents are to hold talks with Chelsea officials this week in order to determine whether the powerful Ivorean striker has a future at Stamford Bridge or not. The 33 year old currently has a year remaining on his contract with the cl...

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Funny story: Top Cop Predicts Old Firm Carnage

Top Cop Predicts Old Firm Carnage

A top cop has predicted "utter carnage" in Scotland ahead of Easter Sunday's Old Firm clash at Ibrox Park between Rangers and Celtic. Inspector Wullie McPherson predicted an upturn of up to 80% on domestic violence figures, principally visited upo...

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Funny story: Fixtures company Targeted by protesters

Fixtures company Targeted by protesters

A new Facebook group has been set up and is gaining momentum as ordinary people are rebelling against the draconian nature of the company behind the football fixtures. "Have you read the terms and conditions for the fixture list? It's under the li...

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Funny story: Fergie To Eclipse Real Madrid By Dropping Premiership Trophy Under A Tank

Fergie To Eclipse Real Madrid By Dropping Premiership Trophy Under A Tank

Manchester United boss, Sir Alex Ferguson has vowed to go one better than Jose Mourinho's Real Madrid by dropping the Premiership trophy under the tracks of a Challenger tank, should United fend off late title charges from rivals Chelsea and Arsenal.

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Funny story: Chelsea Pile On The Pressure In Title Race

Chelsea Pile On The Pressure In Title Race

Chelsea maintained the pressure on league leaders Manchester United last night with an emphatic 3-1 rout of Birmingham City; Kalou and a Malouda brace figuring on the score sheet. It must be worrying for the Blues though, that Fernando Torres exte...

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