Scotland boss Craig Levein has announced his squad for the upcoming Carling Nations Cup games. Scotland play Wales and Northern Ireland on May 25th and 29th respectively and the former Dundee United manager has used the opportunity to include 2 mo...
One of the major candidates to fill Edwin van de Sar's gloves, his countryman, Maarten Stekelenburg, accidently dropped the Dutch trophy out of the bus after winning the title with his present club Ajax. (It didn't injure anybody) Man United scout...
No one wants to take on the Manager's role at West Ham as fans tried to demonstrate what a fighting spirit means to players attending a 'celebration dinner' in Park Lane. Meanwhile Avram Grant is going to try and complete a hat trick by managing a...
Park Lane, LONDON: Metropolitan Police report that West Ham Utd players showed more fighting 'spirit' at their end of season party, than they have all of the football season. A spokesman for the Metropolitan Police said: "We were called at 9.15pm...
Manchester Utd's plans to celebrate their 19th league title and, possibly, a third European Cup are "exhausting" and will seriously effect preparations for next season. Manager Sir Alex Ferguson is reportedly horrified by the club's plans to celeb...
Former England coach Steve McClaren has been told that he will not be considered for the vacant managerial position at West Ham because his English language speaking skills are no longer good enough. McClaren was the bookmaker's favourite to repla...
In 1995, eminent American sex psychologist Burt Inglebrat wrote the award winning "Five Minutes Of Pleasure : A Lifetime of Commitment, a treatise on how a brief carnal event can lead to decades of maternal or paternal responsibility. Inglebrat ha...
Corinthian Casuals will represent England in the first qualifying round of next season's Europa League. The amateur outfit have benefited from their good behaviour on the pitch. They have never had a player booked or sent off. Indeed it has been over...
Avram Grant was last night embroiled in a legal battle the likes of which this country has never seen. After West Ham's owner's David Short-And-Stubby and David Albino-Malnourished-Lion-Face made clear to Grant that his tenure had come to an end,...
The unseated members of the BNP who lost in the recent local elections have claimed that had they not been voted out of office, Stoke City Football Club would have won the F A Cup against Manchester City. Leader of the group, Noel Himmler said tha...
Kilmarnock keeper Cammie Bell has threatened to quit the game after the 5-1 home thrashing at the hands of SPL champions Rangers. Bell admitted at the end of the match at Rugby Park that the whole experience had been humiliating and that he is ser...
An ecstatic Sir Alex Ferguson hailed Wayne Rooney after the Scouser kept his cool to slot home the penalty that clinched the Premiership title for Man Utd. Fergie couldn't praise the sometimes troubled striker enough after the 1-1 draw with Blackb...
Avram Grant, the ex-manager of Premier League West Ham United, who were yesterday relegated to the Championship after a 3-2 defeat at Wigan, is to be sent hurtling into space by Hammers fans who are just about sick and tired of his pathetic excuses.
Kenny Dalglish was last night insisting that his Anfield revival is still very much on track, despite the Reds going down 2-0 at Anfield to Tottenham Hotspur. A cracking first half volley from Rafa Van Der Vaart, and a second half penalty conversi...
Arsene Wenger has his beady eye on Nancy FC defender Cedric Nincompoop. The Gunners manager is desperate to reinforce the spine of his team with some much needed Gallic muscle. Hangdog Wenger has come out with guns blazing after criticism that hi...
A Premier League footballer, said to be a household name, has taken out a super injunction following a missed penalty. The star feared that if it was reported it might harm his chances of securing a new lucrative contract. Super injunctions have b...
Arsenal supporters really got the hump with their team, their manager, and the directors at the Emirates as the Gunners crashed 1-2 to Aston Villa in their final home game of the season. Two Bent goals decided the issue, apparently. Disgruntled...
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