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Funny story: Desperate 'House Husband' Attempts Hara-Kiri Over TV Programming

Desperate 'House Husband' Attempts Hara-Kiri Over TV Programming

SEATTLE (Post-Intelligencer) - A stay-at-home dad attempted ritual suicide after being exposed to too many women's interest TV programs.

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Funny story: FDA Releases Suicide Pills

FDA Releases Suicide Pills

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - The FDA gave the O.K. to "Suicide Pills" today. Many anti-depressants cause suicidal thoughts and actions, especially in younger adults. The "Suicide Pills" are a new push by the Bush Ad...

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Funny story: Terrorist Kills No One and Wounds No One In Daring Rubber Band Shooting Rampage

Terrorist Kills No One and Wounds No One In Daring Rubber Band Shooting Rampage

New York City - The hapless terrorist, Al Spankma Salami, once again showed the world how inept he was after viciously attacking a Star Trek convention with rubber bands.

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Funny story: Dyspraxia sufferer fails in third suicide bid

Dyspraxia sufferer fails in third suicide bid

Albert Steven's has suffered from dyspraxia for most of his life. He was diagnosed when he was only eight years old and for years has dealt as best he can with this terrible affliction.

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Funny story: Top Russian banker shot dead: a case of assisted suicide?

Top Russian banker shot dead: a case of assisted suicide?

Moscow - (AssoCIAted Mess): The Central Bank of the Russian Federation's First Deputy Chairman Andrej Kozlov, has been gunned down in a Moscow sports park amid intense media speculation that his death may be yet another clear case of assisted su...

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Funny story: Are you crazy?

Are you crazy?

Are you crazy? Take the TeenScreen suicide test, and most likely you are. Designed, with government and Big Pharma backing and funding to penetrate society from a young age, Teen Screen is a catch all for any "mental disease", such as bitin...

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Funny story: Terrorists Spare Virgin Air

Terrorists Spare Virgin Air

Due to religious principles, (yes, those criminal thugs have a self-serving one) and not wishing to get into a negative relationship with the seventy-two virgins waiting for each in heaven, terrorist have decided not to target Virgin Air with suicide...

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Funny story: Terminal Celebrity

Terminal Celebrity

I had originally intended to do an interesting and amusing piece on actual calls to suicide hotlines. However they proved to be fairly monotonous, and boiled down to 2 or 3 major themes. The most frequent sort of call went something like this:...

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Funny story: Group Urges Suicide Screening for Psychiatrists

Group Urges Suicide Screening for Psychiatrists

The North Dakota chapter of Citizens for Common Sense today issued a call to action in hopes to curb the rampant suicide in the psychiatric industry. An alarming study has conclusively shown that psychiatrists have more than double the suicide rate o...

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Funny story: David Blaine To Attempt To Break World Record For Most Failed Suicide Attempts In One Week

David Blaine To Attempt To Break World Record For Most Failed Suicide Attempts In One Week

American illusionist David Blaine has announced he will attempt to set a new world record for most failed suicide attempts in the space of one week. The news comes on the back of his failure one week ago to break the world record for longest time spe...

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Funny story: World leaders mourn unexpected suicide of Sinn Fein lifestyle guru

World leaders mourn unexpected suicide of Sinn Fein lifestyle guru

London, Thursday 6 April 2006 - (Associated Mess): A feeling of utter shmuck and incomprehension prevails in the corridors of power in Whitehall and Capitol Hill today as the world comes to terms with the sudden and totally mysterious, unexpected...

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Funny story: Penguin Suicide At An All Time High

Penguin Suicide At An All Time High

A Report From Edward R Morrow...

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Funny story: Suicide Bomber Stages Funeral Within Funeral

Suicide Bomber Stages Funeral Within Funeral

MIQDADIYA - This city sixty miles north of Baghdad held its first ever funeral within a funeral.

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Funny story: Mass Suicide Spawns howamidoing.com Email Service

Mass Suicide Spawns howamidoing.com Email Service

After a large number of clients began committing suicide, howamidoing.com, a future email service, came up with a new host of services for their clients, the company announced Monday at a press conference.

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Funny story: Suicide bomber blows up his own Terror Cell

Suicide bomber blows up his own Terror Cell

The sole survivor of yesterday's comical explosion in Iraq told reporters from his ICU unit in Tikrit, "We send Abu on his way with time-bomb belt ticking. Next thing we know we hear knock at door and Abu going 'I forgot my ..'

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Funny story: SUV Owners Form Suicide Club as Gas Prices Rise

SUV Owners Form Suicide Club as Gas Prices Rise

Detroit (AP)--Sales of American SUVs plunged in September as spiking gas prices pushed many consumers to buy more fuel-efficient foreign vehicles. Yet most SUV owners are now stuck with their unwanted and unpaid-for vehicles, and have formed a nation...

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Funny story: Bush Nears Failing Grade

Bush Nears Failing Grade

President Bush said it again. The President announced we were fighting the war in Iraq because of 9/11. Hello? Can't someone explain that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11, and that the suicide terrorists of 9/11 were not Iraqi? Iraq was a secula...

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