Washington, DC - As news today of the decisions top lawyers from both the United States and the United Kingdom reached the White House, the President was apparently relieved to learn that the American Revolution was illegal under British law and ther...
Minimum Wage TSA union workers, smarting from a series of law enforcement charges running from rape, murder, theft, drug smuggling, pedophilia, and sexual fondling and harassment attempted to make it all right by detaining a British man who claims h...
We present for your delectation and perusal, 42 future memories, that we believe will come a reality!
UK Memory One:
"Aye, I remember when we only had street riots once a day!"
UK Memory Two:
"I can remember what Petrol and Diesel were!"
UK Memory Three:
"I remember when you could buy a week's groceries for three people for under £1,400!"
UK Memory Four:
The recent riots in the UK have proved one thing, that those who participated certainly need a harsh lesson and the Prime Minister has approved of an idea from the innocent people who have been severely damaged by the riots.
The rioters, looters, thugs and other scum are to be dumped into containers,without a hearing or trial, put in jumbo transport aeroplanes and shipped immediately off to Som...
The latest figures released by the treasury indicate that the UK's operating cash balance is vastly inferior to that of the takings from the fruit machine used in Eastenders' eponymous pub, the Queen Vic.
The figures show that at present the count...
Prime Minister, David "Do Nothing Dave" Cameron, and Deputy PM Nick "Does My Bum Look Big In These Trousers?" Clegg appear all set to authorise the export of some mediocre British weather to the Americans.
In recent days, temperatures in the USA h...
If sending Churchill's bust back to England wasn't enough of an insult, President Obama continued his back handed slaps to the Island Realm by tying the country's signature dish of 'Mushy Peas' into his frustration at Congress's unwillingness to agr...
The latest submission to the Upper Denture Gazette Ode competition, by Inchcock, presented for your perusal.
Beloweth you will find an ode written,
About the Coalition, with whom I'm not smitten,
Found on the back of the Beano, handwritten,
In the hope that someone will listen!
The Coalition was formed, and austerity they did enforce,
It didn't stop the MPs from going to Ascot racecour...
Security Guard required for work in the Nottingham area
Must be able to speak, and understand some English
Have own transport (Bicycle Or bus pass)
Be aged between 18 to 96 (Other ages considered)
Ex-taxi drivers welcome
It would be advantageous, if the applicant has the ability to be surly, sneer, spit, swear, and senticous (Prickly-thorny)
Be prepared to work up to 110 hours a...
The nation consoled itself today in the face of mounting sporting setbacks by proudly acknowledging the one area of sport where British dominance is unchecked.
Recent evidence that the nations footballers, tennis players, rugby players, track athl...
A total news black out has been imposed on football after an unprecedented upsurge of scandals involving XXXXXXX out of wedlock, and charges of XXXXX whilst otherwise engaged in marriage, according to XXXXX, a now discredited reporter.
David Cameron has announced that Libya is to move from it's present location to a purpose built warehouse just outside Newport Pagnel.
Cameron met the new Libyan rebel leader Mustapha Laugh during a recent package holiday to Lanzarote. The British...
Despite its exhausting and increasingly sanctimonious involvement in Libya and Egypt, the US this week confirmed that it was determined to take necessary action and invade a small, Esso service service station in Bracknell. The proposed action was co...
Britain's Prime Minister David Cameron today admitted his concerns over the recent protests staged in several Middle Eastern countries by its dissatisfied populace.
Speaking from a wealthy friend's private estate in Egypt Cairo today, he said:...
All the below are genuine signs noted by people throughout the UK.
Sign in a launderette:
Automatic washing machines - please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
Sign in a London department store:
The Bargain Basement is now upstairs.
Outside a farm in Nottinghamshire:
Horse manure 50p per pre-packed bag 20p do-it-yourself.
In a Security Company office:
From Dense Inchcock Spoorf Gazette Reporter - 10th Feb 2011 - 1049hrs
Disgraced former Labour MP Eric Illsley faces a possible prison term when he is sentenced for fiddling his expenses.
Illsley, 55, was under massive pressure to stand down as the member for Barnsley Central after he pleaded guilty last month to dishonestly claiming some £14,500 of public money.
But he did not quit as an...
The ambulance service is having to upgrade its vehicles because some patients are becoming too fat, information from freedom of information requests show.
Every service in the UK has commenced buying specialist equipment, which includes wider stre...
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