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Funny satire stories about Olympics

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Funny story: Lamb to the slaughter as Murray faces Federer in Gold Medal showdown

Lamb to the slaughter as Murray faces Federer in Gold Medal showdown

London - A repeat performance of this year's Wimbledon Men's Finals pitches the desperate Scots wannabe against the ball-crushing maestro of Grand Slam supremacy. "Yeah, he'll get his ass kicked in two straight sets," Rafael Nadal's tarot card rea...

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Funny story: New Olympic Sporting Event Added to 2012 Summer Olympics

New Olympic Sporting Event Added to 2012 Summer Olympics

Stuffing your face for gold - Using both hands, he pick's up the four pounder bacon cheeseburger, and holds it in preparation for what must be for two-time world champion power eater John Keesler, a time of intense concentration on how he plans his attack. Ever calculating, he eye's the burger looking for a weak spot. Now he's flexing his jaw bone, his mouth opens and there he goes, he' stuffs it...

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Funny story: Amazing Gold for Team GB!

Amazing Gold for Team GB!

The Stadium at the Olympic Velodrome erupted in ecstatic cries of Land of Hope & Glory as Stephen Mole, 12, won an amazing Gold in Tiddlywinks. Mole exclaimed that his feat was 'Unbelievable'. Proud parents Oliver and Augusta Mole, speaking fr...

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Funny story: Black gymnast Gabby Douglas stripped of gold medal!

Black gymnast Gabby Douglas stripped of gold medal!

LONDON -- Olympic gymnast Gabby Douglas has been stripped of her gold medal at the 2012 Olympic Games for "not using one's black affiliation to win a match." "Upon further review of the video footage," official Suchet Zwambi said, "we determined t...

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Funny story: Showing support at the Olympics? There's an app for that

Showing support at the Olympics? There's an app for that

In order to show support at the Olympics, it's been necessary to buy a flag for each country supported, but no longer. Lancashire applelet design company, App-N, have launched the iFlag. "I couldn't get tickets for the Olympics," said App World! e...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 2nd August 2012

Football Gossip & comments 2nd August 2012

Olympics Mens Football: GB beat Uruguay to reach quarters The team captained by Luis Suarez will now be known as UruGoingHome. Olympics Womens Football: GB beat Brazil at Wembley. The ladies showed they are as equal if not better than the men, Mainly by missing a penalty which would put them 2-0 up. The match was watched by 75,000, an incredible figure for womens football. Although hal...

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Funny story: Portuguese win gold and silver in Olympic diving

Portuguese win gold and silver in Olympic diving

Nobody was surprised to Portugal atop the podium in the Olympic diving, with Ronaldo and Nani making a clean sweep between them. Nani's dive in the twenty-five metre event was technically perfect, earning him the gold, whilst Ronald's dive lacked ele...

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Funny story: London 2012 is the XXX Olympics

London 2012 is the XXX Olympics

It was finally noticed today that the London 2012 Olympics is the thirtieth in modern times. It being modern times, Roman numerals are used. Thirty in Roman numerals is written XXX. "Oh yes," said Candi Apple, the Gymnastics organiser. "I'd not re...

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Funny story: Michelle "The First Mama" Obama Picked Up By Olympic Lady Wrestler

Michelle "The First Mama" Obama Picked Up By Olympic Lady Wrestler

LONDON - America's First Lady, Michelle Obama could very well be the most popular American in London, no matter what Bob Costas or Matt Lauer may think. On Sunday merry Michelle hugged every single member of the United States men's basketball team...

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Funny story: Olympic Blunder Credits Michael Phelps As Swimming For Narnia

Olympic Blunder Credits Michael Phelps As Swimming For Narnia

LONDON - Michael Phelps of the United States endured 15 to 20 minutes of pronounced anxiety on Tuesday when the Olympic Scoring Committee credited his Gold Medal performance in the 100 Meter Crap-style Deathstroke to the fictional world of Narnia.

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Funny story: Empty Settees due to Lack of Olympic Coverage

Empty Settees due to Lack of Olympic Coverage

The scourge of empty seats which are somewhat tarnishing the Olympics came into sharp focus again today. An Olympic watchdog has said too many settees are still far too empty. Lord Coe vented his frustrations at the eyesore he encounters when snoo...

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Funny story: Bums Needed

Bums Needed

An Olympic plea on the internet for more bums to fill empty seats has resulted in some strange outcomes. Some people have asked how old the seats are and one queer query asked whether the bums required had to be men's or womens. The problem at...

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Funny story: Surprise in the Olympics at Myanmar's national anthem

Surprise in the Olympics at Myanmar's national anthem

With only six athletes at the London 2012 Olympics, nobody had any hopes that the tiny Burmese state of Myanmar would win a medal. They have, however, beaten the odds to take silver in the shooting, with Maung Kyu, 42, producing his personal best.

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Funny story: Second Olympian Expelled For Racist Tweet

Second Olympian Expelled For Racist Tweet

LONDON - A member of the Swiss soccer team, Michel "Mohawk" Morganella has been expelled from further participation in the London Olympics and sent home. The Swiss team lost to the South Korean team 2-1 on Sunday. And on Sunday night the 23-year-o...

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Funny story: UFO in Stratford from the Stratosphere Unimpressive

UFO in Stratford from the Stratosphere Unimpressive

When people watching the Olympics' fireworks display at the end of a tedious march of nations saw something in the evening sky, it was not a bird, a plane, nor Superman. If NBC wanted great ratings, they have apparently caught the interest of thos...

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Funny story: Britain applauded for filling stadiums with tiny people

Britain applauded for filling stadiums with tiny people

The British Olympic committee have been applauded by the World Equality Movement for giving over so many seats at Olympic venues to very tiny people. "We're very pleased with how many seats have been given over to people with diminished stature,"...

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Funny story: Fifty Shades of Gold for British Olympic team

Fifty Shades of Gold for British Olympic team

British Olympians were expected to have picked up at least one gold so far, with the Road Cycling team failing miserably to do so, and Rebecca Adlington also failing to earn a phone call from Cash 4UR Gold. "It's been a little disappointing," said...

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