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Funny satire stories about Banks

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Funny story: Boils for Banks to be Slashed

Boils for Banks to be Slashed

The City is facing unprecedented pressure to come to grips with the Boils culture whereby Bankers are provided with huge Boils that are frightening to their partners and send children screaming over cliffs. Nick Clegg, sporting his student scarf,...

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Funny story: Banks Want a Labour Government Back

Banks Want a Labour Government Back

Top Bankers meeting in the dungeons beneath the City have decided they must get a Labour Government back quickly. Rioting students have put the fear of God into them as they see only further trouble ahead. Sending students to prison as you try...

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Funny story: China Taking Over U.S. Banks, Why They Are Constantly Changing Names!

China Taking Over U.S. Banks, Why They Are Constantly Changing Names!

In case you are wondering why your local banks are constantly changing names from traditional names to ones with names like PSB, First Fifth and Our Citizens First, it is because China is steadily taking over United States banks one at a time. The...

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Funny story: Vatican Bank denies links to Lebdev raid

Vatican Bank denies links to Lebdev raid

Rome - (God's Banker Update): The Pope's bagman has strenuously denied reports that September's police raids on the First Vatican Moneylaundering Bank of Pyongyang are in any way connected to this morning's drama in Moscow. First Vatican CEO Cardi...

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Funny story: Banks Face Hefty Fine for Murdering Delinquent Homeowners

Banks Face Hefty Fine for Murdering Delinquent Homeowners

Dover, DE (BNSE): Justice Department investigators confirmed today they are considering possible fines and other penalties against several of the United States' largest financial institutions for the murders of hundreds of homeowners delinquent in...

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Funny story: American Families Forced to Stay in Foreclosed Homes Against Will

American Families Forced to Stay in Foreclosed Homes Against Will

Many of the largest banks in America, including the Bank of America, not to be confused with the Other Bank of America, have been forcing most of their customers, who have not been paying on their mortgages for months, to remain living in their homes...

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Funny story: Irish Bank uses topless tellers to raise funds

Irish Bank uses topless tellers to raise funds

In a desperate bid to stay solvent an Irish Bank has urged all its bank tellers to work topless in order to save their jobs. Molly Malone from Anglo-Irish Bank retail division "We need to recapitalise our current assets, if we are to cover the...

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Funny story: Vatican Banks taken over by Northern Rock

Vatican Banks taken over by Northern Rock

After days of extremely tense negotiations, the Vatican City bank has finally been taken over... by Northern Rock. The British based bank, notorious for going bankrupt in 2008, is back on the market having completed a new deal to take ownership of...

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Funny story: Italian Prosecutors Seize Pope Benedict's $30M Bank Account

Italian Prosecutors Seize Pope Benedict's $30M Bank Account

Pope Benedict is the Head of The Vatican, the Holy See. It's like if you owned a corporation. The money is yours. You can do whatever you like with it. The Vatican is also a government, a sovereign entity, a dictatorship with the Pope at the Head. Po...

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Funny story: Pope Rushed to Hospital; Said to be Suffering 'Withdrawal Symptoms", Victoria Gotti at Bedside!

Pope Rushed to Hospital; Said to be Suffering 'Withdrawal Symptoms", Victoria Gotti at Bedside!

Rome is in shock with the news that once again the Vatican is under investigation for irregular banking practices, including money laundering, and the Pope's Top Banker Ettore GOTTI Tedeschi is the target of the Probe! Officials say Vatican funds...

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Funny story: Blair 'spitting venom' as second 'God's Banker' under surveillance after Pope visit!

Blair 'spitting venom' as second 'God's Banker' under surveillance after Pope visit!

London - (P2 Lodge News): Last week he was bathed in magnificent reflected Vatican glory, sitting in the front row at a televised Papal Mass, an official Pontifical address in Westmonster Hall and countless other Papa Ratzi public beanfeasts. This...

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Funny story: Vatican not only welcomes "bent Priests" it also loves "bent bankers"!

Vatican not only welcomes "bent Priests" it also loves "bent bankers"!

The Catholic church never manages to survive long without a scandal or two for it's leaders and followers to swallow. A well accepted fact that hidden amongst the ranks of its Priests there are certain undesirable elements fiddling with little boy...

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Funny story: Fear & Panic in the City

Fear & Panic in the City

Bankers, white faced with terror, are reeling from the onslaught from Vince Cable and Nick Clegg against their bonuses. Cable, sensing blood, is on the warpath: 'I am very angry with the Banks. If they go on giving themselves bonuses I will be abs...

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Funny story: F--k Banks.*

F--k Banks.*

Summer, 1972: I'm driving up Mascher Street toward Roosevelt Boulevard with my grandmother. Nana did all the driving, of course, but the five-year-old farting into the passenger seat of 1966 Chevelle station wagon had one very important job, Reading the time and temperature on the marquee sign in front of the Central Penn National Bank. "It's eleventy-free firty, Nana," I'd shout. (I was a l...

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Funny story: Bank Prepares To Leave - Only £5 Notes Left

Bank Prepares To Leave - Only £5 Notes Left

Now that the Government's independent banking commission is looking at reform in the industry, banking giant HSBC has announced that it intends to increasingly replace £20 Notes with the smaller £5 denomination as it runs down stocks of the banknote...

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Funny story: Banks' worrying message

Banks' worrying message

As Bank after Bank declares how profitable they are and the economic recovery looks fairly certain the Coalition Government is becoming increasingly worried. 'What has become of the economic disaster left by the previous Government?' moaned Chance...

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Funny story: Nurses and Teachers to bail out bankers.

Nurses and Teachers to bail out bankers.

Public sector workers are furious with new terms and conditions of employment which will see them leading the changes needed to cut the public defecit,and bail out fat cat bankers. Teachers and nurses have been advised that they are no longer able...

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