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Funny story: Part #6: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

Part #6: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

Part #6: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date: 10. Shorthand was invented by a monk in the 16th century who actually had no hands, but wrote with his penis. 9. The earliest computers were so large that their vacuum tubes were the size of a railroad car. 8. In 2009, the checker champion of Heavenly Acres Nursing Home, Larry Putt, had to relinquish his title after steroids were present in h...

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Funny story: Dating guidelines released

Dating guidelines released

A new Government department aimed at reducing the amount of single people in the country has today released a guideline of do's and dont's when out on a first date. Mr S Shady, Minister for Demographics, said "Our department has been given the tas...

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Funny story: Part #5: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

Part #5: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

Part #5: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date: 10. The fastest animal in the world for a short distance is the squirrel, dodging your car and running around it and under it and twice across the road and back in ten seconds! 9. There has never been a Jewish person by the name of Rambo! 8. Before people began yelling "Geronimo!" as they jumped out of airplanes, the most heard word was, "Para...

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Funny story: Part #4: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

Part #4: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date:

#10. In certain villages in remote areas of Peru, any woman who uses a man as her bed covering during the night is considered to be married. #9. The Number one nickname among the North's Eskimo people is "Mo". #8 The average male will have gravity cause his balls to drop a full six inches between the age of 40 and the age of 70. Yet, THERE ARE NO COSMETIC BALL SURGEONS ANYWHERE IN THE US OR...

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Funny story: Part III: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date!

Part III: Factual Facts To Impress Your Date!

Following are some generally unknown facts that you can use while on a date with that new Girl/Guy: 10. The longest mile that was ever recorded was 5,281.5 feet long! 9. The singer Joe Cocker learned his famous jerky style of singing as a 6-year-old after eating 10 peach tree seeds after a dare. 8. Linguists tell us that while everyone says that they have eaten corn on the cob, in truth,...

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Funny story: MORE: True Little-Known Facts To Amaze Him/Her On Your First Date!

MORE: True Little-Known Facts To Amaze Him/Her On Your First Date!

1. Until the outbreak of terrorism against the United States in 2001, guards at airports usually kept their eyes opened for big boobs, rear ends. 2. At Brigham Young University, tail-gaiting football fans usually cook barbecued chicken, open kegs of Near Beer! 3. According to those that were here at the time, the U.S. Census for 1490 showed over ten million buffalo! 4. According to how it...

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Funny story: True Little-Known Facts To Amaze Him/Her On Your First Date!

True Little-Known Facts To Amaze Him/Her On Your First Date!

1. The number one fear of all men is public speaking. However, the number two fear is that their next cellmate has a whopper. 2. Most people today believe that the Macarena came from Latin America. However, it was actually copied from a dance by President Jimmy Carter's brother, Billy, after drinking too much beer before getting into the line to see the two-headed goat at Ye Auld Peanut Days in...

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Funny story: 'Birds and Bees' replaced by 'Bees and Banks'

'Birds and Bees' replaced by 'Bees and Banks'

Dating website S-Harmony claims "pairings are predetermined using a system of basic quantitative signals" - whatever that means. Scientists, however, take a more prosaic view claiming men simply want looks and women want money or as anthropologist...

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Funny story: Singles Adverts

Singles Adverts

Male Seeking Female Aged over 40? Well educated? Like wine, the arts, long walks in the countryside? Yes? Well fuck off then, I'm looking for an 18 year old vacuous size six stunner with massive tits, no brain and absolutely no opinion on anything. Must be able to iron, cook and give a decent blowjob. Female Seeking Male Bitter, unsuccessful, middle aged, spastic wallowing in my own...

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Funny story: Black Males Stunned as White Female Announces She Will "Go Back" to Dating White Guys

Black Males Stunned as White Female Announces She Will "Go Back" to Dating White Guys

Birmingham, MI - Racial relations in the United States of America took a major twist early Tuesday morning, as Rachel Barker, a high school student from Birmingham who had recently "Gone Black," made the unprecedented decision to "Go Back" to dating...

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Funny story: TheSpoof Personal Ads Section

TheSpoof Personal Ads Section

Personal Ads -- M-F-Uncertain-Gay-Unhappily Gay--Dog Lovers Men seeking women: 60'ish, fairly well hung, male, RC Monsignor, West Virginian-Jesuit, seeks love match with large breasted, thunder-thighed, small footed, cross-eyed, female dwarf with delusions of granduer for quickie phone sex. Call (304) 555-1212, ask for information. 22-year-old college grad seeks woman with no education...

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Funny story: The Dating Game #4

The Dating Game #4

Well the Hypno-Therapy went well, at least I think it did. My therapist tells me I am regressing really well, although I'm not too sure he means it, I have a feeling he is trying to confuse me. Back to Janet. She insisted we went for a drink, claiming that she had a 'bubbly personality' and 'great sense of humour'. Fuck me, could that woman drink. She was the first woman I have met that...

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Funny story: eCumonme.web now top dog in hookup biz!

eCumonme.web now top dog in hookup biz!

GREENUP, KY - Like Humpty Dumpty, eHarmony.com has taken a big, big fall, clear from the top position in the dot com dating and hookup business, that is. And like old Humpty, ain't nothing going to put it back together again because there is a new...

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Funny story: Jessica Simpson takes break from men, calls Lindsay Loham for advice

Jessica Simpson takes break from men, calls Lindsay Loham for advice

Jessica Simpson, the gal guys love to hate, is taking a break from the dating scene, so say friends close to the silly bitch. "She wants to know what it is about her that repels men," said one BFF. Following her much publicized break up wit...

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Funny story: The Dating Game #2

The Dating Game #2

In the recent magazine article "The Dating Game #1" I promised to you, the loyal listener, that I would join a dating agency, meet women, and relate all my experiences from what happened along the way. Well I am pleased to be able to tell you that I immediately went off and duly filled out an application form and have been accepted by the rather fetchingly named agency, "Subtle Connections".

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Funny story: 16 Reasons You Think Your Date Is Not Going All That Well

16 Reasons You Think Your Date Is Not Going All That Well

16. "Hey, Humble Boy, my face is up here. Those don't talk." 15. Apparently can't recall your name because she keeps referring to you as "Bachelor #666". 14. She fails to laugh at your favorite restaurant joke, the old mustard mustache. 13. While your windshield is being squeegeed, she says "Give him a good tip, he's my Ex." 12. First thing she says when she sees you is "Great, what is...

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Funny story: Muslimsingles.comma dating web site opens

Muslimsingles.comma dating web site opens

Are you a single Muslim woman? Tired of a secular lifestyle, and sick of wearing nice clothes and makeup, and drinking with your friends after work on a Friday? Then why not join Muslimsingles.comma! Here's a few of the Muslim men you can meet: 'Male, aged 22, seeks female Muslim to stay in the house all day, washing and cleaning and cooking, and having endless children. Must stop drinking and...

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