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Funny satire stories about Unemployment

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Funny story: US trade gap a wide shock

US trade gap a wide shock

Cambridge, MA - M.I.T. economists are perplexed over a largely wider trade gap in September. According to calculations run on the data, as reported by Norance Hornaby of East Campus, Americans must be producing much less and buying much more. "I...

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Funny story: Unemployment Rises

Unemployment Rises

(New York - NY) According to a government report released this week, the nation's unemployment rate rose above 10% for the first time since 1983, a more drastic jump than expected. Although last month the Obama administration estimated that 640,0...

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Funny story: Obama to address unemployment with job tax

Obama to address unemployment with job tax

WASHINGTON DC - According to my source, Heinze Kissinger, the Obama administration is set to announce a new solution to the dearth of jobs in America. Due to the shortage of jobs here, all jobs will no longer pay any money. Instead, all workers w...

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Funny story: 88,000 rise in unemployment a mere 'drop in the champagne glass'

88,000 rise in unemployment a mere 'drop in the champagne glass'

A collective sigh of relief was audible around the corridors of Westminster today, as news of a mere 88,000 rise in unemployment permeated the cigar and whisky fug of the Parliamentary bars. City experts, expecting a much bigger rise, were opening...

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Funny story: Obama says stimulus plan is 'not working'

Obama says stimulus plan is 'not working'

WASHINGTON DC - President Obama today held a short informal press conference with a few lessor known reporters. He chose this venue, in his office, to make a lucid revelation of the solution to all economic problems. Follows his statement. The s...

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Funny story: Employees Fired for Refusing to Honor Five-Finger Discount

Employees Fired for Refusing to Honor Five-Finger Discount

BROOMFIELD, CO - Two employees of a Best Not to Buy store in Broomfield, Colorado, were fired because they tried to stop a shoplifter. "Booyah!!" shouted Jared Bergstreser, 20, as he tackled a man attempting to leave the store with a plasma screen...

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Funny story: 2.4. million British unemployed told to 'get elected as MPs' by Norman Tebbit

2.4. million British unemployed told to 'get elected as MPs' by Norman Tebbit

Lord Tebbit, the former ultra right-wing Cabinet Minister who helped to throw millions of British workers onto the dole in the 1980s, said of the now 2.4 million British unemployed: 'What's wrong with these whingers?' 'If they're out of work, all...

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Funny story: Jobless armies paving the way

Jobless armies paving the way

(Washington) President Obama announced yesterday massive road construction planned nationwide enlisting aid from thousands of unemployed people. The "Pot Hole Brigade" as they've been dubbed are excited to be back working again. Finding employm...

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Funny story: E-E-T: Southwest Bags Children, Michael Bloomberg Apologizes (Kind Of) And Google Waves

E-E-T: Southwest Bags Children, Michael Bloomberg Apologizes (Kind Of) And Google Waves

(Washington, D.C.) The U.S. economy shrank to a 5.7 percent annual pace in the first quarter of 2009, ending its worst drop in five decades due to declines in housing, inventories and business investments. However, a ray of hope, the White House Gene...

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Funny story: Man who won "best job in the world" fired after losing island

Man who won "best job in the world" fired after losing island

Ben Ealing, who won the coveted, "best job in the world" - caretaker of a sun-drenched island - has been sacked on only his second day, after he fell asleep on the job, and woke to find the tropical paradise had been stolen. 'I only had my eyes close...

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Funny story: Unemployed woman gets paper cut and sues Job Centre

Unemployed woman gets paper cut and sues Job Centre

Bristol, England - An unemployed mother of four children (with five different fathers) has announced she is suing Job Centre, after attaining a paper cut whilst filling out a form. The 18 year old who has never had a job and has been permanently pre...

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Funny story: Grim Reaper Laid Off Amid "Killer" Recession

Grim Reaper Laid Off Amid "Killer" Recession

ATLANTA - In a stunning announcement yesterday, the U.S. Center For Diseases (USCD) said that, due to budget cutbacks amid this economic recession, they were forced to lay off their highest ranking employee, Mr. Grim Reaper. Although Mr. Reaper...

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Funny story: Unemployed Workers to Deliver Bailout Funds

Unemployed Workers to Deliver Bailout Funds

The United States government announced today, that it is speeding up delivery of bailout funds to the poorest banks hit hard by the economic crisis. The plan calls for newly-unemployed workers to deliver these funds as quickly as possible to these ai...

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Funny story: Spoof Writer Laments, Few People Rating Spoof Stories

Spoof Writer Laments, Few People Rating Spoof Stories

Spoof writer NickFun lamented today that fewer people than ever have been rating his stories, even though he thinks he's doing a fine job. I check my statistics almost daily", Fun said. "Every day, even when I don't have a new story, I get at lea...

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Funny story: Recession victims TV Cowell X-job op

Recession victims TV Cowell X-job op

Credit crunch job losers could find employment through a new TV series. Simon Cowell, the Marquis of Granby, George Osborne and Les Dennis are to be judges in the new series of Britain's Got A Job. "We are looking for real victims of the credit...

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Funny story: De-Luxe Superjobcentres To Cater For Unfortunate Professionals?

De-Luxe Superjobcentres To Cater For Unfortunate Professionals?

Calls were made today by powerful lobby groups in Westminster for the establishment of Superjobcentres at strategic locations around the country, which would cater for the legions of unemployed professional white-collar workers, many of whom have bee...

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Funny story: Pelosi's "500 Million Americans" Included Illegals

Pelosi's "500 Million Americans" Included Illegals

(Washington, DC) -- Yesterday, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi defended her seemingly erroneous statement that without a stimulus package "500 million Americans lose their jobs every month." Pelosi clarified the figure, stating "I was including...

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