Austin, TX - The Texas State Board of Education has voted to make "Word A Day" toilet paper the core Language Arts course for Texas public high schools. Some parents have voiced opposition to the change because Word A Day toilet paper is more exp...
Sacrimento, CA - With noo roolzs from the Calafornyuh state Bord of Educashun, noing how to spell "gradjewashun" isn't no longer a rekwiremunt to be able to grajewate from high scool. You dont haff to no how to spel no for syllbul wordz to gradjewate...
Every school library in the country is currently being torn to shreds and replaced with thousands of Amazon Kindles that can only access books written by British authors. The wet dream of both Amazon and Michael Gove has become a reality as workme...
Parents of 15-year-old Katie Smeilding are currently suing their daughter's high school for turning her into a person they no longer recognise; one that is respectful, polite and willing to learn. Katie Smielding has had behavioural issues and a s...
A man has taken all of his life savings and used them to buy a £35,000 Lexus in preparation for his secondary school reunion. Timothy Davis felt inadequate on hearing from an organiser at the school that many of his former classmates had become v...
Pupils across the country are not carrying out their homework and are instead handing in pieces of A4 plain paper with a hashtag link written on it, furious teachers are reporting. Teenagers across the country are using the newly created "Obama /...
Inglewood, CA (Washington Post) - the Drug Abuse Resistance Eduction program, D.A.R.E. or simply DARE as it is ubiquitously known, announced today that it expects 2014 to be its most successful year ever. DARE is an educational outreach program in...
DOVER, Delaware - Delaware's senior Senator Preston Wybinski [R-Dover] has informed the members of the press that the state senate has just implemented an emergency bill. The bill named The High School Chest Bumping Bill was mandated by the senate...
Mathematics would not exist in an independent Scotland. The startling revelation was made today in a speech by First Minister Alex Salmond, where he outlined more of his plans for the country in the event of a Yes vote. The shock announcement...
CLEVELAND, Ohio - Michelle Obama was in Cleveland speaking to high school students about the importance of eating right. One student hollered out "You mean eating left ma'am, as in left, Democrats, right, Republicans." Mrs. Obama replied that t...
BEAN TOWN, MA -- Boston public schools have suspended the distribution of condoms-well some condoms. Specifically, officials will no longer provide, upon request, any condom that is packaged in a wrapper that encourage users to "hump one," advertises...
COLORADO SPRINGS - The dean of Zebulon Pike College, which is located in Colorado Springs has just informed the news media that the school will be undergoing a name change. Dean Lennox Woodpulp, III, stated that after receiving a petition signed b...
With so many problems from gas shortage to water shortage, home teaching is beginning to look like the answer for many educators. "Think about the gas and money we would save", says one political proponent. "Lots of smart moms & dads out there...
Any observer of a kindergarten class can easily determine why boys should be kept at home for at least one more years: 1. While the little girls are sitting quietly at their desks, the little boys are ON the desks. 2. While little girls are sleeping at nap time, little boys are tying little girls' braids to chair legs. 3. Little boys think finger paint is war paint. 4. Paste is fo...
LARAMIE, WYOMING- With the successful launch of the Cowboy Ph.D. programs at Colorado State in Ft. Collins and the University of Wyoming in Laramie, men and women of all stripes seeking a career are flocking to enroll. Especially popular among t...
SACRAMENTO, California - The state of California has always prided itself as being in the forefront when it comes to education. California high schools have in recent years gone from concentrating mostly on non-academic activities such as cheerlea...
SYRACUSE, New York - Local police are reporting that they have responded to dozens of calls about snowmen being stolen from the front yards of homes in Syracuse. Officer Sterling Foxfudge, 37, with the SPD stated that in every instance the perps h...
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