It has been revealed by a top Japanese officials that the Columbian Cartel paid a two million dollar ransom to Japan for the release of Paris Hilton. An unidentified Cartel member says it was money well spent. "We make tons of money from her,...
At this very moment Paris Hilton is being held captive in Japan by the Japanese Government. Paris Hilton flew to Japan on a private jet, and upon landing in Japan Paris Hilton was detained and interrogated for hours by the Japanese military. At this...
Paris Hilton was sentenced to two consecutive six-month sentences in the Clark County Detention Centre, which were suspended, and she was warned that she faces being jailed for up to a year if she breaks the terms of her probation. "The purpose of...
Glamorous Socialite Paris Hilton was recently sentenced to 30 days in rehab after several incidents involving substance abuse. The first reported incident occurred last Wednesday at 21:17pm outside a night club in LA. Paris was seen being remove...
North Korea - Today Kim Jong Il held a very rare press conference to announce an offer to the world. Translated it was roughly this: "Today we ate some oreo cookies for breakfast, very naughty. Ahem, we have a more serious matter to discuss. Day a...
LAS VEGAS - Well it looks like the Land of Chips will also now be known as The Land Without Balls as Las Vegas authorities have let the poor, little, misguided, rich bitch Paris Hilton get off virtually Scott free. The Hilton ho has become an expe...
A new book states that Paris Hilton is her own Drug Mule as she hides her stash up her ass! The book, apparently titled, "Flash! Bars, Boobs and Busted" is by Ryan Simkins, a photographer of the "Girls Gone Wild" videos. In the book Simkins goe...
HOLLYWOOD - Tyra Banks' baby America's Next Top Model began its 14th season with an extremely dismal viewership number. The show which features a bevy of beauties competing for the title placed fourth in its time slot. America's Got Talent pulled...
BEVERLY HILLS - Paris Hilton, who says that there is no one who looks more like Marilyn Monroe than her, called a press conference at her hair stylist's FuFi Fondue's Haven of Hair Salon in Beverly Hills. Paris said that all week she has been read...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama has stated that he has invited Hollywood celebs Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan to visit him and his wife, the "First Mama" at the White House. The president said that he is really concerned with the way things ha...
Lindsay Lohan came to the defense of fellow troubled celebrity Paris Hilton by backing up Hilton's statement Paris was carrying someone else's purse when a bag of cocaine fell out of it. "I swear on my 12-step rehab pamphlet that I saw someone s...
Paris Hilton may be the stupidest person on Earth. But it is her vanity, in addition to her flaming, Megan-Fox-level stupidity that'll allow the Nevada District Attorney to convict her of Cocaine possession. You may recall that Hilton was arrested...
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Paris Hilton has instructed her daddy's personal account to see about purchasing a penitentiary in California so that when she does something wrong she can have the judge sentence her to spend the three or four days there. Hilton...
In anticipation for an upcoming conviction on possession of Cocaine, Paris Hilton has reportedly asked Lindsay Lohan for tips on how to properly prepare herself for time in the slammer. Though details of the actual conversation were sketchy, Ainsl...
Sarah Palin chose all American good girl, Paris Hilton, little known on the national stage, as her vice-presidential running mate -- a surprise stroke aimed at attracting Hillary Clinton supporters, but which could bolster the campaign's key theme of...
Arrested for the umpteenth time, Paris Hilton told police that she believed that Miley Cyrus put the stuff in her purse. "Or it was that Lohan woman. We all got called in for that fake clinic mess and I set my purse down and those two came in. I t...
LAKE TAHOE, Nevada - Lindsay Lohan, the ex-con, was in Lake Tahoe at The Wig Wam Room of The Paiute Papoose Resort Gambling Casino Hotel. She was participating in the hotels annual $1 million purse Texas Hold 'Em Poker Tournament. Last year LiL...
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