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Funny story: Tory Party earthquake as Brit Top Knob goes bankrupt

Tory Party earthquake as Brit Top Knob goes bankrupt

London - A leading pillock - er...pillar! - of the British Establishment faces criminal bankruptcy charges following a £100m 10-year fraud that bankrolled his gargantuan celeb A-Lister pretensions. Yeah. Protected by a powerful smoke 'n' mirrors...

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Funny story: Labour Conference: Balls at root of PM's Tiny penis...jibe

Labour Conference: Balls at root of PM's Tiny penis...jibe

In a rousing, rapturous Labour Party conference where only three elderly members died, the shadow chancellor appeared a shadow of his current shadow self, until his startling observations brought the house down and lit up his rotund face. Ed Balls...

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Funny story: Elderly Woman Dies of Natural Causes - Hundreds Celebrate

Elderly Woman Dies of Natural Causes - Hundreds Celebrate

There was jubilation in the streets of Britain as an elderly woman, who had been ill for some time, passed away earlier this week. The elderly woman had once been a person of some importance but that had not been the case for nearly a quarter of a...

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Funny story: By-election result 'a furious ball of nothing'

By-election result 'a furious ball of nothing'

Voters in Eastleigh are today counting the cost at yet another hyped election that fizzled into a complete let-down. Political pundits have reflected that this one initially promised so much colour, then failed to deliver. There were several joke...

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Funny story: "Is Cameron Still A Tory?" Asks Disgruntled Lord Ashcroft

"Is Cameron Still A Tory?" Asks Disgruntled Lord Ashcroft

Lord Ashcroft has decided not to donate any more of his hard-earned cash to the Tory Party. After giving over £10 Million in donations to the Conservatives he does not think that he is getting, "value for money". A close pal of the peer has discl...

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Funny story: UK Prime Minister David Cameron to Join Boy Band 'One Direction' to Appeal to Younger Voters

UK Prime Minister David Cameron to Join Boy Band 'One Direction' to Appeal to Younger Voters

Spoof Political Correspondent Phani Tikkla has been handed a file through Whitehall sources stating that UK Prime Minister David Cameron has joined the successful boy band 'One Direction' in a last bid attempt to woo younger voters into the Tory Part...

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Funny story: IDS thinks shelf stacking more important than Geology

IDS thinks shelf stacking more important than Geology

Work and Pensions secretary Iain Duncan Smith has said that people should not think that they are too good to work for free in supermarkets on the governments back to work scheme. He told the Andrew Marr program this morning that the government would...

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Funny story: Queer Tory Revolt

Queer Tory Revolt

Tory MPs are turning their backs on the Government in a stand on Gay Marriage. Backbenchers, who never went to a Public School, are not willing to go into the Lobbies with their fellows. 'We draw the line at Gay Marriage' said Ray Parsnip, educate...

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Funny story: Upside Down and Nowhere to Go

Upside Down and Nowhere to Go

The lovely Mrs. Claire and I are hanging upside down in our car. This is not a comfortable position - trust me. After I'm sure we've stopped moving, I ask her if she's ok, which is really the only thing that matters to me. She assures me that she is, and asks the same of me. After a few seconds of silence, I state what was probably obvious to her: "Honey, I am so glad you're ok. I think we're...

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Funny story: David Cameron 'stalking whorse' bollocks names wrong Tory

David Cameron 'stalking whorse' bollocks names wrong Tory

London - A third-rate Sunday red top 'exclusive' has named an up-and-coming Tory tosspot as the secret leadership challenger to oust PM David Cameron in a coup d'etat. The revelations come from the paper's same 'deep throat' that channels Camilla...

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Funny story: King Obama? Rand Paul Doesn't Think So.

King Obama? Rand Paul Doesn't Think So.

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm the type of Conservative who has God sanctioned missionary style sex with my wife while thinking about Ronald Reagan. Today's hero of Freedom is Kentucky Senator Rand Paul. Rand is the son o...

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Funny story: "Anybody who votes Tory is gay", claims Ed Balls

"Anybody who votes Tory is gay", claims Ed Balls

Shadow Chancellor Ed Balls made a public announcement today, advising "anybody who votes for the Conservative Party is gay. Me and little Ed and all the boys decided at Ed's house yesterday so now you all have to be on our side, otherwise you're gay.

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Funny story: Captive breeding centre to open in Ashford, Kent

Captive breeding centre to open in Ashford, Kent

In a first for medical science the Deputy Prime Minister will today open a captive breeding centre in Ashford. The centre will provide a habitat for lonely Liberal Democrat voters and hope to produce the next generation of Lib Dem voters. "I'm ve...

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Funny story: Tory's new 'ducking-stool' disability assessment launched

Tory's new 'ducking-stool' disability assessment launched

George Osborne has announced the governments new method of assessing claimant's disability, known as the 'ducking-stool'. The contract, worth £134 trillion, is expected to be awarded to Cameron, Osbourne & Cronies Consultants. "For far too lon...

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Funny story: Government call for more Children to be taken into care

Government call for more Children to be taken into care

Members of the government have called for more children to be taken into care. This comes after a report that said some care homes in isolated rural areas are now in danger of being surplus to requirements. "It seems that over the last 20 years t...

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Funny story: Tory Grandees Tell Party to "Shake off Elitist Image"

Tory Grandees Tell Party to "Shake off Elitist Image"

In an article in today's Observer leading Tory figures including Lord Norman "On Yer Bike" Tebbit warn Prime Minister "Call Me Dave" Cameron to lose their "arrogant toffs" label. It has been a tempestuous week for the party, having lost one of its...

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Funny story: Lame Duck leaves Pathetic Pond

Lame Duck leaves Pathetic Pond

Stereotypical Tory and Chief pussy whipped Andrew Mitchell has eventually bowed to plebeian pressure and fallen on his Caesarian sword. The lamest of lame ducks was clinging on to his position like an alcoholic's giro after most definitely brandi...

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