Special to TPN - After the resounding success of the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare), President Obama has decided to launch a new effort to reinvent the wheel. Leading this initiative will be former U.S. President Jimmy Carter, best known for hav...
Olympic officials have been asking themselves if Marijuana should be outright banned for all athletes who plan to participate in the Olympic games, now that it has become more accepted and legal in certain parts of the world. Speculation has risen...
HOLLYWOOD - Bruce Jenner is 63, and he has said on several occasions that he is tired of playing the little submissive husband to the Kardashian Klan director or operations Kris Kardashian-Jenner. It is no secret in LaLaLand that Kris wears the pa...
An independent Scotland must be given the chance to fly away from Brazil in 2016 with their heads held high, which is easy to do if your head is not weighed down with a heavy gold medal round your neck, said a man on Twitter yesterday. "Scotland m...
A Russian gymnast, in training for the upcoming Olympic Games, went into labour on a trampoline yesterday giving birth to a bouncing baby boy. Unaware that she was pregnant, Elena Kulakov had been carrying on with her demanding training regime in...
The decision by the International Olympic Committee to drop wrestling from the Games and replace it with synchronized sweating has triggered a wave of protests around the athletic world. "This is a slap in the face for all the serious sports that...
PHILADELPHIA, PA--Area man William Kevol expressed dismay today that Nike had only withdrawn its endorsement of Olympic gold medalist and accused murderer Oscar Pistorius Tuesday, noting than a murder charge should be "one of those things you get imm...
The world of sports was shocked on Tuesday when it was announced that the 2020 games will be held without the sport of wrestling, removing it as one of the 26 "core sports", even though the sport is steeped in tradition going back to the ancient game...
It has been announced that medals will no longer be handed out to finalists in the 2014 games. The decision was applauded by television networks and ushers in a new era for the aging sports franchise. The decision to halt medal awards was voted o...
Londoners have shown their Masonite enabling love of the true blue yet again by electing the mop top Tory blond Boris Gudenuf for another turd, or is that term? The leather faced goodbye boy Lank Kivington said it had been a good blow job by blow...
Topia's premier pentathlon performer is desperately seeking a new couch. After taking part in the last 10 Olympic Games, veteran pentathlete Adi Nuff has been feeling 'absolutely knackered'. "All I want is a good lounge about, watching telly all...
The entire British Olympic team are having to return all medals after it was revealed that government agents had been spraying "slowing down" gas through the vents at the opposition sleeping quarters. Whistleblower Agent Dodgy Noseybastard thought...
Drinks all round as Brits hit Gold (Labels) - Four days into the games, and as predicted, the big two teams of Russia and Great Britain are dominating the medal table with five golds each. The shock of day two was the defeat of defending champion...
In a potential embarrassment for Olympic organisers, a leaked LOGOC document has revealed showpiece items which were considered- but rejected- for the London 2012 Olympics Games closing ceremony. A spokesman for LOGOC has expressed great concern o...
Doctor's have revealed the number of people being referred to a physcho[therapist] since the end of the Oh lympic [see #1] games has jumped to more than triple the figures before the game started. Pyscho Dr David Pole explains: "It quite often t...
Olympic bosses are secretly planning to extend the length of the 100 metres race to make more cash from TV broadcasting rights. As athletes continue to snip fractions off the winning time over recent years, broadcasters are offering less cash for...
Barcelona - El Raval - Sunday: Another hot sunny Sunday in the Catalan capital. For the Shuttlecock clan, there was much to anticipate, for Sunday evenings are traditionally the best times to see the Magic Fountain on the olympic hill of Montjuic in all their spectacular glory. The whole clan were raring to go, and wallow in the Magic Fountain's musical lightshow. All that is, except Mart...
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