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Funny satire stories about Oil Spill

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Funny story: Tony Hayward Smothers a Denver Omelette in Blackstrap Molasses

Tony Hayward Smothers a Denver Omelette in Blackstrap Molasses

Tony Hayward sat down to tell some lies over breakfast, then ended up drenching his Denver omelette with thick, black syrup, said a source. Studies show Hayward's company, Blackwater Petrol, has likely been shoveling bullshit the American public's...

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Funny story: World Worried China Seeking Major Oil Spill Of Its Own To Counter US Gaining Free Publicity

World Worried China Seeking Major Oil Spill Of Its Own To Counter US Gaining Free Publicity

China's quest for super-power status seems to have taken a bizarre turn with the PLAN repeatedly trying to torpedo Chinese oil rigs to get a good Oil spill going in the last two weeks. "Chinese submarines were spotted off the coast of Hong Kong targe...

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Funny story: First Two-Headed Baby Born On Gulf Coast

First Two-Headed Baby Born On Gulf Coast

The first two-headed baby has been born on the Gulf Coast to a couple who live near Pensacola. Mookie & Piehead Jenkins, who work at the sideshow of the Barnum & Bailey/Ringling Brothers Circus near Orlando, say the baby or babies were bor...

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Funny story: Cameron invites the Daleks to join the coalition

Cameron invites the Daleks to join the coalition

Prime Minister David Cameron has extended an invitation to the Daleks to join the UK's coalition government (but not the gay or Pakistani ones). Phoenix Joe asked Mr Cameron to explain what was behind this latest rather perplexing move. "Well Pho...

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Funny story: Obama says BP should pay off the entire US national debt

Obama says BP should pay off the entire US national debt

Startling news from the U.S. - president Obama has said he wants BP to pay off the entire U.S. national debt because they are a bunch of naughty white boys…. And he wants them to do it by next Thursday - in addition they must solve the age old proble...

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Funny story: A Second Gulf of Mexico Oil Leak Has Now Been Found

A Second Gulf of Mexico Oil Leak Has Now Been Found

BOURBON BAYOU, Louisiana - Well it appears that now we have a second oil spill spewing forth in the Gulf of Mexico waters off the coast of Louisiana. Joining the BP's Deepwater Horizon well is Diamond Offshore drilling rig Ocean Saratoga. This oil...

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Funny story: BP Awarded UK Oil Slick Contract

BP Awarded UK Oil Slick Contract

Phoenix Joe has just been informed that BP has been awarded a lucrative contact by the UK coalition government following their "impressive efforts" to contain the small leak (caused by faulty American equipment and faulty American workers) in the Gul...

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Funny story: BP strike deal with Turks to solve oil crisis

BP strike deal with Turks to solve oil crisis

BP has proudly announced that it has struck a deal with the Turkish Kebab Makers Guild that will solve the oil crisis in the Gulf. Tony Hayward of BP said that intense negotiations had taken place over the previous week, which ha resulted in a win...

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Funny story: Obama Ready to Open Big Can of Whup Ass

Obama Ready to Open Big Can of Whup Ass

New York, NY - Talking like he was getting ready for the biggest basketball game of his life, President Barack Obama made it perfectly clear Tuesday morning on the Today Show that he is contemplating opening that big can of whup ass he has stored in...

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Funny story: US Declare War On The Sea

US Declare War On The Sea

The US has put its armed forces on standby today following rumours that there may be an impending war with the sea. Robert Gibbs, press secretary for the Whitehouse said, "we have reason to believe that the sea may have weapons of mass destruction...

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Funny story: Michelle Complains Oil Pressure Mounting for Barry But He Refuses to Let Her Check his Dipstick for Past 46 Days!

Michelle Complains Oil Pressure Mounting for Barry But He Refuses to Let Her Check his Dipstick for Past 46 Days!

As the pressure mounts on the Regime for it's tepid response to the BP Gulf Oil Spill, marital pressure seems to be mounting as well as insiders reveal Michelle is complaining that Barry 'doesn't seem to have any interest in plugging my hole.' Mic...

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Funny story: New Orleans Mayor Says "We Be Needin' Us A Damn Hurricane Ta Blow All Of Dis Effen Oil Shit Da Hell Outta Here Fa Shizzle My Nizzle!"

New Orleans Mayor Says "We Be Needin' Us A Damn Hurricane Ta Blow All Of Dis Effen Oil Shit Da Hell Outta Here Fa Shizzle My Nizzle!"

NEW ORLEANS - The mayor of New Orleans Tyrone "Bling Bling" Du Maupassant-Etouffee has said that the Gulf of Mexico BP oil mess has reached catastrophic proportions. He noted that the Louisiana alligator suitcase industry and the alligator shoe in...

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Funny story: BP Hires Wiley Coyote's Acme Corporation To Help With Oil Spill

BP Hires Wiley Coyote's Acme Corporation To Help With Oil Spill

Acme Corporation is reporting a huge profit upswing this month. Acme is the chief supplier of underwater doo-dads for BP Corporation, the sponsors of what is now the largest oil spill ever. BP has been buying heavily from Acme in its attempts to up c...

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Funny story: The New Orleans Hornets To Change Their Name To The New Orleans Tar Balls

The New Orleans Hornets To Change Their Name To The New Orleans Tar Balls

NEW ORLEANS -Gary Chouest, owner of the NBA New Orleans Saints has just announced at a corporate breakfast that he has decided to change the name of his basketball team. Chouest said that his team's recent 32-41 record is not the reason for his de...

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Funny story: President Obama Knew Early About Oil Leak Fiasco!

President Obama Knew Early About Oil Leak Fiasco!

President Obama knew about the BP oil leak within hours after it happened according to a report in a Washington DC newspaper, plus Barack Obama's mother-in-law, Marian Robinson. . "Barack came into the White House after talking wi...

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Funny story: BP: A Virgin Sacrifice The Only Guaranteed Answer, But Can We Find One?

BP: A Virgin Sacrifice The Only Guaranteed Answer, But Can We Find One?

A spokesman for the BP Oil Company says that the cap they placed on the leaking oil well in the Gulf was only partially successful...well, say ten to thirty percent. Immediately the crowd booed, sandals were thrown and he was then hit by nearly a...

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Funny story: Rejoice! Gulf Coast Oil Gusher is "Fountain of Youth"

Rejoice! Gulf Coast Oil Gusher is "Fountain of Youth"

At Tony Hayward's press conference this morning, no one expected what they were about to hear. Mr. Hayward opened the session by quoting from the Robert Browning poem, "Grow old with me, the best is yet to be." As reporters looked at each other...

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