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Funny satire stories about Liverpool

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Funny story: Former Atomic Kitten Liz McClarnon Says Goodbye To Her Muffin Top And 'Ello To Her Lower Biscuit

Former Atomic Kitten Liz McClarnon Says Goodbye To Her Muffin Top And 'Ello To Her Lower Biscuit

LONDON - Liz McClarnon, former member of the Atomic Kitten, appeared in Look Much Closer Magazine and showcased her brand new slender look. McClarnon said that she went from a size 10 to a size 4 in four short weeks. She said that the secret was t...

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Funny story: Roy of the Poolers, the Bastian of the Kop!!

Roy of the Poolers, the Bastian of the Kop!!

The KOP, This was ANFIELD, Liverpool: Despite losing to their local rivals Everton and being second to bottom of the Premier League, Roy of the Poolers refuses to panic, as noted in his recent statement; "I don't think it is a crisis. I thought t...

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Funny story: Manc Claims 'It's Not Us With The Speech Impediment -- It's The Scousers.'

Manc Claims 'It's Not Us With The Speech Impediment -- It's The Scousers.'

Mancunian newspaper vendor, Johnny Trousers, of Ardwick Green today categorically denied that Mancunians have a speech impediment, and the real problem in that department lies with Scousers. "We're all right mate, we are, us," Trousers said. "It's...

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Funny story: Peoples Republic of Merseyside - Liverpool Finally Gets Self Determination

Peoples Republic of Merseyside - Liverpool Finally Gets Self Determination

"We're not English, we're Scouse" has been the mantra for decades and in a defiant act sure to infuriate the middle class shandy drinking homo's in the South of England; Liverpool have finally woken up the fact that they are much better off (and inde...

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Funny story: Joe Cole Receives Second Red Card In A Week - For Speeding!

Joe Cole Receives Second Red Card In A Week - For Speeding!

Joe Cole, the Liverpool and England footballer who was sent off in his very first competitive game for the Reds against Arsenal at the weekend, has come a cropper for the second time in a week, when he was given a second red card - for speeding! C...

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Funny story: Liverpool's Slow Boat to China

Liverpool's Slow Boat to China

Exultant Liverpool fans are busy learning the words of the team's new theme song: 'A Slow Boat to China' so they can tell their Chinese owners 'what you mean to me.' Steven Gerrard told me on a crackling line from Canton that he couldn't be happie...

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Funny story: Cameron launches Big Bollox Building Society

Cameron launches Big Bollox Building Society

Liverpool - (Northern Crock Bank 2 Mess): A raid on dormant UK bank accounts is to feed the Prime Monster's passion for a new Big Bollox Building Society. Announcing the move in the country's scrounger capital of Liverpool Mr Cameron vowed to carr...

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Funny story: Liverpool Plan To Portray City as 'Not Shit'

Liverpool Plan To Portray City as 'Not Shit'

Mention the name 'Liverpool' to anyone and their immediate reaction will be to check that their pockets have not been picked or that they haven't stood in shite. Such is the opinion of the vast majority of people who are not of the Liverpudlian ra...

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Funny story: Liverpool Put Up For Sale

Liverpool Put Up For Sale

Liverpool has been put up for sale. It is thought to be the first time that the UK Government has decided to sell an entire city. A buyer is hoped to be found before the end of the summer. The decision to sell Liverpool follows a severe economic c...

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Funny story: Liverpool declares itself a republic

Liverpool declares itself a republic

The city of Liverpool today erected a 400 ft wall around its borders announcing it no longer wanted to be counted as part of England but to be a country all by itself. The people of Liverpool are now believed to be tying the coast of there city t...

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Funny story: Rafa Benitez Sacked

Rafa Benitez Sacked

Rafa Benitez has been sacked as manager of Liverpool FC following yet another defeat. The board took their decision immediately after the defeat tonight by Lille in the Europa league. Sammy Lee, Benitez's assistant is likely to take charge of first t...

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Funny story: Luciana Berger - Sexy Maybe, But Certainly Not A Scouser

Luciana Berger - Sexy Maybe, But Certainly Not A Scouser

She's pretty, sexy, intelligent, she lives in Camden, North London (according to this frequently inebriated researcher) and she's a politically active New Labour candidate for the safe seat of Liverpool Wavertree. Which prompts the question: Why?...

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Funny story: Merseyside Cops To Police Manchester Derby

Merseyside Cops To Police Manchester Derby

It's just been announced that Merseyside Officers will take over crowd control duties for this Wednesday's showdown League Cup semi-final second leg tie at Old Trafford, amid fears of crowd trouble following the COMS tie last week, which City won in...

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Funny story: Liverpool to send help to Haiti

Liverpool to send help to Haiti

Liverpool are to send much needed help to the people Haiti. Eighty five shellsuited helpers from the Liverpool Supporters Club drunkenly boarded a DC10 at Liverpool Paul Ringo Lennon Airport today on a mission to provide much needed support to the a...

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Funny story: Manchester United FC's Old Trafford Stadium To be Shut Down Following Allegations Of Racist Chanting

Manchester United FC's Old Trafford Stadium To be Shut Down Following Allegations Of Racist Chanting

Sensational news just in from the UK Premier League - leading UK outfit Manchester United are to have their stadium shut down following allegations that Manchester United fans indulged in racist chanting in their League Cup Quarter Final Tie against...

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Funny story: Liverpool name 'Strictly Come Dancing' as new manager

Liverpool name 'Strictly Come Dancing' as new manager

After another woeful performance, this time against Fulham, Liverpool have named their third manager this season. In an attempt to win both points and reverse the flagging morale at Anfield, Liverpool have gone for the tried and tested skills of the...

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Funny story: Travel Guide: Liverpool

Travel Guide: Liverpool

There can be fewer more beautiful cities than the jewel on the Mersey that is Liverpool. Once home to the Beatles, this lively metropolitan city sees regular visitors from all over the world who visit Penny Lane, Strawberry Fields and search in vain for Abbey Road (which is in London). The Cavern is a Mecca for these travel weary Beatles fans, though the original club has long since become a tr...

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