After John Boehner said that Congress "ought to be judged on how many laws that we repeal", fellow Republicans went wild writing bills to strike down existing laws. Some were overzealous and others were confused. After a few hours, GOP members had r...
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi's regular morning visit to her exclusive hairdresser is apparently not just to maintain her famously stylish look. According to low level sources at All Seasons Salon in D.C, Representative Pelosi has been takin...
Reported by an assistant (requesting anonymity) for Senator Charles Schumer, his office is currently seeking "bully services aid" and therapy following Russia's actions with Mr. Snowden. Speaking on Face the Nation yesterday, Mr. Schumer proclaime...
With Congress's approval rating now lower than that of a cockroach (at about 9%), and with Republican House members' approval even lower (approaching that of a maggot), GOP lawmakers in the House have decided to pass a Conceal and Carry Law that woul...
WASHINGTON D.C. In the wake of the much-televised George Zimmerman trial, with echoes of loud protests over the verdict audible from the street, another sound can be heard inside the congressional chambers: the clinking of champagne glasses. Foll...
Lester Montoya, speaking for the group Rational Law Reform, said yesterday that Texas Senator Ted Cruz has gone too far in his latest proposed amendment to the senate bill designed to overhaul immigration policy in the U.S. The amendment would req...
Yet another absolutely inane comment coming from an NRA leader has sparked outrage among the United States' citizenry. Today, NRA Deputy of Bullets Czar Randy "Bubba" Beaufordt issued a statement that stated getting hit by bullets "can actually be go...
WASHINGTON, DC -- President Barack Obama has recommended adding dog meat to America's school lunch menus and military chow halls. As a child, the president was force-fed Dalmatian steaks that his Indonesian step-and-fetchit transsexual "father" La...
NORFOLK, Virginia - The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have gone to Congress to state their case regarding the wanton ingesting of animal crackers throughout America. PETA's Executive Director Mimosa Ledbetter told the news media that...
Washington DC -- With the nation trembling from recent threats by film critics, pressure cooker salesmen, wise guy journalists and wanna-be movie stars, enforcement agencies are demanding greater authority to monitor and control America. Meanwhile...
NEW ORLEANS, LA -- Reports out of Baton Rouge confirm the state capital's effort to "intensify" gun violence across the state of Louisiana by aiming to obtain an equal ratio of magazine clips to issues of People Weekly inside medical facilities, defe...
Washington, DC -- The Obama Administration's top lawman has officially arrested the entire population of the United States. In an unprecedented Justice Department directive, Attorney General Eric Holder outlined a plan to imprison every American...
WASHINGTON, DC - Tired of endless titillation leading to little or no payoff, Congressional representatives all but declared war on Hollywood this week with Bill HR-26969, a sweeping measure which would require popular HUNGER GAMES actress Jennif...
With just two days remaining before $85 billion is cut from the federal budget, members of Congress said today they're introducing measures to lessen the impacts of the sequester. According to Rep. Rigley Higspirt, one proposal being discussed is...
BRUSSELS, BELGIUM. A report published by the Brussels, Belgium-based International Union of Really Worried Scientists calculates the destructive power of the US Congress as equivalent to an eight-mile wide meteor hitting Earth. The report warns th...
Washington, DC -- The upside of the government's sequester initiative is a $1.2 trillion reduction in the deficit. The downside is that the blunt force action will produce many unanticipated cuts and changes that will adversely affect every American.
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama, 51, has advised Congress that he wants them to put getting rid of the United States penny on the frontburner. The president speaking to a group of unemployed windshield wiper auto workers visiting the White Hous...
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