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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: QPR to punish non-mourners and send them to North Korea.

QPR to punish non-mourners and send them to North Korea.

The QPR authorities are to sentence anyone who has not participated in mourning sessions for deposed leader Neil Warnock to terms in North Korean labour camps, reported the Shepherd's Bush Gazette. The decision to hand out punishments of at least...

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Funny story: London riots postponed as game of football breaks out between Tottenham and Everton

London riots postponed as game of football breaks out between Tottenham and Everton

The London Riots were postponed last night on police advice after a game of football broke out at White Hot Lane between two teams of eleven footballers. The final day of riots had been pencilled in for early January after the scheduled date in Au...

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Funny story: Neil Warnock reveals all about his sacking by QPR

Neil Warnock reveals all about his sacking by QPR

The controversial Neil Warnock spoke out today about his sacking at QPR, pinning the blame on chairman Tony Fernandes. And West Ham. And Carlos Tevez. And the FA. And the Premier League. And the fans and players at QPR. Thats all, I think. But defini...

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Funny story: Lionel Messi named 'Footballer of the Year'

Lionel Messi named 'Footballer of the Year'

Leo Messi was today named the 'Short Footballer of the Year' in a prestigious ceremony at the Dog and Duck in Cleethorpes. 5 foot 7 inches Messi held off competition in the voting from now retired 5 foot 6 inches Roberto Carlos, 5 foot 5 inches De...

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Funny story: QPR give silk purse to Mark Hughes.

QPR give silk purse to Mark Hughes.

QPR have named Mark Hughes as their new boss after promising him up to £30 to spend on sheep. The Welshman has received assurances from the QPR board that they match his own ambition and are prepared to place a £20-30 war chest at his disposal, en...

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Funny story: Transfer Window: Villas-Boas denies Chelsea will sell Torres in January

Transfer Window: Villas-Boas denies Chelsea will sell Torres in January

Chelsea manager Andre Villa-Boas has denied the club will sell £50million flop striker Fernando Torres in the January transfer window. "It's an ABSOLUTE LIE" AVB grumbled into a microphone shoved into his face after another failure to pick up thre...

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Funny story: Chelsea Spared By Pompey - Not Next Time, Says Fan

Chelsea Spared By Pompey - Not Next Time, Says Fan

Chelsea's victory over Portsmouth in the third round of the FA Cup yesterday has been welcomed by a Pompey fan, though he is disapppointed by the London club's behaviour. As we reported on Saturday, Fratton Park 'superfan' Jake Seaport asked his h...

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Funny story: Transfer Window: Paul Scholes comes out of retirement for Manchester United

Transfer Window: Paul Scholes comes out of retirement for Manchester United

Following a traumatic first half of the season which saw Manchester United crash out of the Champions League and Carling Cup, the red devils announced that Paul Scholes has come out of retirement after just six months to answer the Old Trafford SOS -...

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Funny story: Transfer Window: Berlusconi promises to make Carlos Tevez the best 'player' in the world

Transfer Window: Berlusconi promises to make Carlos Tevez the best 'player' in the world

Former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi has promised that he will make Carlos Tevez the best 'player' in the world if he joins the Italian football chumpions AC Milan. 'Bunga-sconi' as he is now known after leaving office, promised Tevez t...

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Funny story: Kop In New Race Row

Kop In New Race Row

It's just been revealed that fans in Anfield's famous Kop end got involved in yet another race row as the FA cup tie against Oldham Athletic drew to a close on Friday evening. According to St John's ambulanceman, Jimmy Clackett, Kop season ticket...

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Funny story: City Legend Mike Summerbee Banking On A 12-0 City Win

City Legend Mike Summerbee Banking On A 12-0 City Win

Manchester City FC legend, Mike "Tra la la la" Summerbee is apparently confident that City will put a tidy dozen past local rivals, United, in Sunday's FA Cup 3rd Round battle of the giants. And following City's 6-1 demolition of the Stretford via...

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Funny story: Pompey Urged To Go Easy On Chelsea

Pompey Urged To Go Easy On Chelsea

As the third round of the FA Cup arrives, most fans lick their lips in anticipation of excitement and upsets. But one fan is hoping his second-tier team will take pity on their Premier League opponents. Portsmouth "super fan" Jake Seaport is ur...

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Funny story: Eamonn Holmes says Manchester United fans 'starved' of success

Eamonn Holmes says Manchester United fans 'starved' of success

SKY tv presenter and disgruntled celebrity Manchester united fan Eammon 'donut' Holmes spoke out today about his beloved United's poor run of form and recent downgrading by credit rating agencies S&P, Moodys and Fitch. "The whole thing is a s...

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Funny story: Manchester United rating downgraded by Fitch, Moodys and S&P

Manchester United rating downgraded by Fitch, Moodys and S&P

The Manchester United business empire was in freefall this morning after the three major credit rating agencies downgraded their risk from triple A to C minus. The downgrading comes after an embarrassing run of results on the pitch over a few mon...

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Funny story: Transfer Window: Man United, Chelsea, Liverpool prepare bid for Everton's Tim Howard

Transfer Window: Man United, Chelsea, Liverpool prepare bid for Everton's Tim Howard

The biggest clubs in the England 'EPL' were today 'preparing bids' to secure the services of the premiershites latest goalscoring sensation, Americanish tourette sufferer Timothy Howard. The Everton net buster and occasional goal stopper marked hi...

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Funny story: Letter From America Just The Tonic For Ailing Manchester United

Letter From America Just The Tonic For Ailing Manchester United

Manchester United officials today revealed that the entire squad felt rejuvenated and raring to go, after a letter from America was read aloud to the first team squad at United's Carrington training ground. Following a roller coaster ride this sea...

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Funny story: Incorrect Football Refereeing Decisions to be made Mandatory

Incorrect Football Refereeing Decisions to be made Mandatory

In what appears to be a follow up of UEFA President Michel Platini's comments about video technology, a spokesperson for the governing body in European Football made the announcement in a press conference yesterday. "UEFA has decided to make incor...

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