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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: Roman Abramovich decides on new Chelsea manager

Roman Abramovich decides on new Chelsea manager

Roman Abramovich shocked the world of football today by announcing that he would do the job of Chelsea manager himself. After sacking young pup Andre Villas-Boas on sunday after a 1-0 defeat at West Bromwich Albion, the media immediately threw the...

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Funny story: Abramovich sacked more managers than Andre Villas-Boas had hot dinners!

Abramovich sacked more managers than Andre Villas-Boas had hot dinners!

Chelsea boss, Roman Abramovich, loves chopping heads off, in fact any manager who risks the wrath of the impatient Russian billionaire will be led to the chopping block and served up on his golden plate, cost what it will! His latest victim Andre...

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Funny story: Putin for Chelsea

Putin for Chelsea

In a surprise choice Chelsea directors have decided to have the present manager of the Russian team KGB as their new Manager. In a statement the directors explained that the discipline at Chelsea needed swift action and with Putin's record of smas...

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Funny story: Katie Price In The Running For Chelsea Job

Katie Price In The Running For Chelsea Job

Former tits out model Katie Price, AKA Jordan, has thrown her pink hat into the ring by declaring herself interested in succeeding Andre Villas-Boas as Chelsea manager. The west London club axed AVB after a dismal eight months in charge of the ail...

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Funny story: Vladimar Putin is new Chelsea Manager

Vladimar Putin is new Chelsea Manager

Freshly victorious Russian President Vlad,feels he has the skills to sort out Chelsea's woes. His new regime will make Frank Lampard very happy as he will be Captain, following John Terry's penchant for perving and pultitrudious, he will be sold t...

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Funny story: Harry Redknapp accepts England job after Man United beat Tottenham Hotspur

Harry Redknapp accepts England job after Man United beat Tottenham Hotspur

Harry Redknapp performed a dramatic u-turn today, worthy of a cockney cab driver or posh Prime Minister, and accepted the England job even though the Football Association haven't offered it to him. Speaking at White Hart lane after Man United beat...

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Funny story: Chelsea sack another manager: Benitez, Griffin and 'arry react

Chelsea sack another manager: Benitez, Griffin and 'arry react

Chelsea owner Roman Abramovitch today pulled the plug on under fire manager Andre Villas-Boas and told security guards to escort him from the building. Following an embarrassing defeat away to lowly West Bromwich Albion yesterday, the knifes were...

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Funny story: Northern Ireland FA to investigate appointment of 'wrong manager'

Northern Ireland FA to investigate appointment of 'wrong manager'

Northern Irish football was thrown into scandal last night after it turned out they might just possibly have accidentally appointed the wrong M.O'Neil as manager. Michael O'Neill was given the job on December 28th 2011, the week between Christmas...

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Funny story: "FFS Lay Off Balotelli!" - Says Die Hard United Fan

"FFS Lay Off Balotelli!" - Says Die Hard United Fan

Die hard Manchester United fan, Donald Skoob, a janitor at Salford University, today appealed to the media, and his fellow fans, to lay off Mario Balotelli. Skoob roundly condemned the media sensationalism surrounding the young Italian striker, in...

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Funny story: United Promise Not To Run Riot At Tottenham

United Promise Not To Run Riot At Tottenham

Manchester United insiders today confirmed that United would not be running riot at Tottenham on Sunday afternoon, as the club is acutely aware of its responsibilities in respect of its own supporters, the supporters of Tottenham Hotspur, and the peo...

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Funny story: Legendary Dead Footballer To Play Again?

Legendary Dead Footballer To Play Again?

Former Manchester United and Northern Ireland star, George Worst, stunned the football world yesterday after announcing he plans to come back from the dead and return to professional football. Mr Worst, dead, from the Heaven area, spoke to us from...

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Funny story: F.A. may drop penalty shoot-outs

F.A. may drop penalty shoot-outs

At last night's Annual General Meeting of the Football Association (F.A.), there was heated discussion about whether to abolish penalty shoot-outs at the end of major cup final games. Penalty shoot-outs were originally used to give strikers and go...

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Funny story: England vs. Netherlands: Live Text

England vs. Netherlands: Live Text

Stuart Pearce in the postmatch interview: "Well we got off to a decent start, but I think getting the third before half time was where we went wrong. It's always better to go in at 2-0 rather than 3. I made a few changes and they didn't seem to have the desired effect. Espescially after just 10 seconds in the 2nd half we went down to 10. My tactic of playing a second goalie then backfired, I was u...

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Funny story: Scot for England Captaincy

Scot for England Captaincy

In a move which will shake the footballing world ex-West Ham player Stuart Pearce, now England Manager, has named ex-West Ham hero Scotsman Scott Parker as England captain. Last season the Scot was named Footballer of the year and now he's Captain...

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Funny story: Ryan Giggs to Play On for A Hundred More Years!

Ryan Giggs to Play On for A Hundred More Years!

Ryan Giggs, the celebrated celebrity litigant and midfield maestro, has revealed to close friends and family that he wants to continue playing football until he is ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY! Giggs, a member of the much-vaunted Manchester United youth...

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Funny story: Pub landlady Marian Curly loses football court case

Pub landlady Marian Curly loses football court case

The English Premier League has won their court fight with Pub landlady Marian Curly over selling the Greek Beer 'Sky' at Premier League games. They have spent nearly £8,000,000.00 in fines and costs for selling Greek beer and Ouzo cheaper than the...

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Funny story: Chelsea Footballer Punches Seven Year Old Mascot

Chelsea Footballer Punches Seven Year Old Mascot

World class philanderer and occassional footballer, Jon Terence, became embroiled in yet another controversy yesterday after punching a seven year old mascot in the face. The match between Chelsea and Liverpool had to be delayed because of a poten...

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