Hollywood CA: The respected heads of the porn industry have made a pitch to the Obama Administration and to the 111th Congress for a $5 Million Bailout Package for the PORN Industry. The initial plea made to the outgoing Bush Administration was limp...
Representatives at this year's Davos conference are rioting, according to Twitter reports from the Swiss resort. A series of meetings have been placed at risk after delegates have taken to violence over bar bills. At a meeting dubbed Banking Af...
An unusual early victim of the recession the shoe industry is falling fast into place behind retail and the car industry in the list of economic bail-out-ees. The industry is estimated to have made almost no profit in the past year and with shoe supe...
After being pressured by the Obama administration, Sleazigroup Inc. reversed it's course today and said it will not take delivery of an expensive corporate jet it previously planned to purchase. The canceled deal comes amid a chorus of concerns fr...
Washington/DC/ Financial News as Usual - Financial Analysts have finally called the DEMs TARP scheme what it really is: Just another BLANKET COVER UP to shield excessive greed and political corruption! Highlighting the TARP disgrace is the break...
CHICAGO, Illinois - Talk show host, media mogul, and the new Secretary of The Treasury Oprah Winfrey has just announced that she is personally lending the United States government $2 billion. Ms. Winfrey, owns five mansions in five different state...
The historic $750 billion in bail out money will be spent to help Ford, GM, and .... Oprah Winfrey. In a move that Nancy Pelosi and Harry Ried said that they will be sure to pass, new President Barack Obama has earmarked $25 billion dollars for talk...
Beijing,China/ Toxic Junk Export News - Despite massive infusions of cash into the sagging US economy, the biggest STIMULUS appears to be the unprecedented outpouring of cash to snap up anything dealing with the Coronation of Barry O'Bama, the Iris...
The leaders of the porn industry were all sitting around on their stained couches in various states of undress chomping on Domino's pizzas. Stardust had just given the delivery guy a tip he'd never forget. "I'm bored." said Maximum Headroom, star of 'No Butts About It'," What could we possibly do to out-sleaze anything we've done before?" "Hey!" yelped Larry Flynt, "Let's ask for a gov...
After ailing banks, automakers and ice cream vendors have all received loans and government bailouts, the US porn and sex work industry is ready to demand a government stimulus 'package', saying the economic slowdown has reduced sex drives and hit bu...
Caracas, Venezuela Office of the President January 10, 2009 TO: Barack Hussein Obama II President United States of America Chicago, Illinois Hola me Amigo Barrio! Forgive my informal address, but I feel we are brothers, even though I have never been friendly with a "darkman" before. But I feel our roots are from the same type of fertile backround, me from the slums of Caracas, you fig...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - When Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild filmmaker Joe Francis traveled to Washington to ask for $5 billion in bailout money, their expectations weren't exactly high. To their surprise, Congress offered them a deal i...
President-Elect Barack Obama announced a plan to bail out the federal government Tuesday morning. He appears to have broad bipartisan congressional support. The federal government has committed trillions of dollars to assisting banks, car companie...
Washington DC: Following the defeat of the $47 Billion "Automaker Bailout Bill" in the US Senate, a meeting was convened in the White House Oval Office. Meeting participants included Bush Administration Officials, the Automaker Chief Executive Office...
Struggling drug dealers have been promised huge amounts of taxpayers money by the government in a deal designed to save their ailing businesses. A government spokesperson stated that the collapse of the industry is a result of previously wealthy b...
Washington DC-- Congress awarded the Mafia a much-needed emergency cash bailout for $300 billion today. The unusual early moring session was held at 2AM behind closed doors. The measure was passed in the House, 435-0. The bill was folded into a p...
The 2008 recession has proven to bad for all business except one. The evangelical enterprise of numbing the hopelessness of the ordinary human by relieving them of their last dime has turned out to be a boom industry. Church attendance is skyro...
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