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Funny satire stories about Shopping

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Funny story: The True Spirit of Christmas: Pepper Spray!

The True Spirit of Christmas: Pepper Spray!

The annual War on Christmas has already taken its toll this year, with atheist billboards going up next to highways across the country, shocking the sensibilities of Christians on their way to Wal-Mart. But some Christians have found a way to fight b...

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Funny story: Coldplay and Wholefoods Market agree to play Mylo Xyloto while customers shop on 10/24

Coldplay and Wholefoods Market agree to play Mylo Xyloto while customers shop on 10/24

AUSTIN, TEXAS - With a stroke of a pen Whole Foods Market have agreed to provide music from Coldplay's newest album, Mylo Xyloto on 24 October, the premiere date. Lead singer Chris Martin was thrilled about the opportunity because Mylo Xyloto tran...

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Funny story: Oxford Street prepares for Christmas 2012!

Oxford Street prepares for Christmas 2012!

If you were just thinking about planning your Christmas presents for 2011, you had better be quick. There are only a handful of outlets still stocking appropriate gifts. Most high street shops have moved on to introducing presents for Christmas 2012.

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Funny story: Customer Thinks Her Opinion Matters, Company In Shock

Customer Thinks Her Opinion Matters, Company In Shock

DES MOINES, Iowa - Sears manager Jason Baker was taken to a local hospital after suffering from a severe case of apathy. The incident occurred when customer Sarah Jenkins, 37, approached Jason to tell him she had been a loyal customer for years and t...

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Funny story: First supermarket trolley for four kids rolled out across supermarkets

First supermarket trolley for four kids rolled out across supermarkets

A BOOM in multiple births has led to the first shopping trolley with four seats. The number of mums having twins rose to 12,000 last year, prompting supermarkets to trial the quad - with extra seats immediately behind the first - in Sandhurst, Berks.

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Funny story: Shoppers Left Unmoved By Elephant Rampage

Shoppers Left Unmoved By Elephant Rampage

A rampaging elephant is something that shoppers don't often encounter in Manchester's Arndale Centre, but that's exactly what happened this morning. A rogue elephant rampaged around the malls, charged shoppers, headbutted plate glass windows, over...

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Funny story: Good Friday leads onto Okay Saturday

Good Friday leads onto Okay Saturday

With the success of Good Friday, when shops up and down the nation report trade is booming bigger than Christmas - mainly because they have to shut at Christmas - merchants of England are asking for more days like Good Friday. "Boxing day is quite...

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Funny story: Future News: Shopping Planet Developed

Future News: Shopping Planet Developed

MERCATUS ORBIS - Earthic Colony Planet #12A, or, Mercatus Orbis (Latin for Trading World), has finally opened. Taking a record 21 months to terraform, and 2 weeks to lay powerlines, internet, docking stations, and buildings, Mercatus will be open...

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Funny story: Isle Of Wight Shopkeeper Earns Accolade For Customer Service

Isle Of Wight Shopkeeper Earns Accolade For Customer Service

A Ventnor shopkeeper has earned a top accolade from a prestigious retail consortium for providing "tip-top, beyond-the-call" customer service. Daisy Prang, who runs the general store in Pillock Hill Road, has received a rosette from the Castleford...

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Funny story: Man Becomes Homicidal Maniac After Saying He'd 'Kill for Decent Burger'

Man Becomes Homicidal Maniac After Saying He'd 'Kill for Decent Burger'

BIRMINGHAM, ENG. - A local Birmingham man has taken his pact to the extreme, as 52 people are dead and scores more are injured. Josh Coe, 21, had said he would 'kill for a decent burger', and after chancing upon a KFC restaurant he found a Zinger...

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Funny story: World's largest supermarket prefer transvestite managers to real women!

World's largest supermarket prefer transvestite managers to real women!

The world's biggest supermarket chain, W**mart, is being sued by some of its female employees because of sexual discrimination and "gender bending"! It seems that W**mart prefers 1st: hetero males; 2nd: gay men, 3rd: transvestites 4th: lesbians, 5...

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Funny story: Guilty: Sussex Man Busted By Wife

Guilty: Sussex Man Busted By Wife

A Sussex man was found guilty of looking at a young ladies bottom yesterday, in the middle of a high street. Ted Brabham, 47, was walking around Horsham with his wife Enid, doing a spot of shopping, when he was caught looking at the posterior of a...

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Funny story: Currys Are Us

Currys Are Us

High Street Electrical giant Currys have just announced that as from Monday, not only can you browse for all your electrical needs, you can also order your tea! Joint owners, Edwina and Tim Curry are delighted with the plan, and Tim explained how...

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Funny story: Valentine's Day Shopping Frenzy

Valentine's Day Shopping Frenzy

Shops across the UK have braced themselves for the influx of inexperienced male shoppers desperately trying to find a last second Valentine's Day gift for their partners. "We've put extra staff on," said Mark St John, manager of Lataman, Altrincha...

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Funny story: Code of Conduct for Shoppers

Code of Conduct for Shoppers

The Consortium of Shopping Centre Retailers have issued a Code of Conduct for anyone using their more specially challenged facilities. 1. Single persons are not allowed access. Shoppers must enter the centre in at least pairs. 2. Shoppers will only be allowed access if they are carrying at least 3 fully laden carrier bags. 3. Customers are only allowed to stop and talk to people they re...

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Funny story: Man Went Shopping Without Trousers!

Man Went Shopping Without Trousers!

Reports are coming in that an ordinary man, who isn't a celebrity or a sports star endured a horrifying ordeal yesterday evening, when he went shopping at a local supermarket, only to realise, half way round the store that he had somehow inadvertentl...

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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth, Susan Boyle and Spoof Writer, Lady Godiva to go on shopping spree for wedding frocks

Queen Elizabeth, Susan Boyle and Spoof Writer, Lady Godiva to go on shopping spree for wedding frocks

Lady Godiva, Spoof Writer, has been invited to go on a shopping spree with Queen Elizabeth and Susan Boyle this month. Queen Elizabeth, an avid reader of the Spoof, and a special fan of the 'female' Spoof writers, heard that Lady G's eldest daught...

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