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Funny satire stories about John Boehner

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Funny story: Shameless Democrats Kill Osama in Naked Bid for Votes

Shameless Democrats Kill Osama in Naked Bid for Votes

Republicans are outraged that President Obama has gotten around to killing terrorist matermind Osama bin Laden. "I'm crushed," said House Speaker John Boehner. "What are we gonna do now? After this it's gonna be a lot harder for our Tea Party friends to say Obama's a terrorist, or that he's secretly a Muslim. Who's gonna believe that nutbag shit now? A few people will say that it's a hoax, tha...

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Funny story: Michele Bachmann Said "Something" Intelligent

Michele Bachmann Said "Something" Intelligent

An inside source on Capital Hill claims that during the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence Michele Bachman said "something" intelligent. There is no word on exactly what she said and apparently both members of her own staff, and members...

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Funny story: Boehner Refuses to Cut Funding to Congressional Tanning Salon

Boehner Refuses to Cut Funding to Congressional Tanning Salon

Washington D.C.- While the battle over budget cuts continues to wage in the capital today, House Leader John Boehner has made one thing clear, "the private congressional tanning salon IS NOT on the chopping block." In a heated discussion with Pres...

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Funny story: Academic Baffled by Newt Gingrich's Fear of Sharia Law

Academic Baffled by Newt Gingrich's Fear of Sharia Law

In his keynote address to the Tenth Annual Conference on Fear in America, noted scholar Dr. O .D. Ebby discussed an emerging fear of Sharia, or Muslim religious law, led by Newt Gingrich. "I frankly don't think Mr. Gingrich's fear is at all rati...

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Funny story: Animal Rights Protesters Demand Republicans and Democrats Change Mascot

Animal Rights Protesters Demand Republicans and Democrats Change Mascot

Washington D.C.- Hundreds of Thousands of protesters converged on Washington this week filling the Capitol Mall and monuments. "We demand the Republicans and Democrats choose new Mascots, they do not embody the fine qualities of Donkeys and Eleph...

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Funny story: Glenn Beck And Jesse James To Form Their Very Own Cable Network

Glenn Beck And Jesse James To Form Their Very Own Cable Network

ALTOONA, Pennsylvania - FOX Network talk show host Glenn Beck, was in Altoona speaking before a crowd assembled in the parking lot at a local McDonald's. He was explaining why it is that he seems to cry so much. He pointed out that he along with...

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Funny story: Boehner: "Smoking Makes Me Cry!"

Boehner: "Smoking Makes Me Cry!"

Majority Leader of the Untied States Congress, John Boehner, appeared on Fox News this past Sunday and was asked by host Chris Wallace about his smoking habit and the fact he seemed to cry quite a bit. Boehner grew red In his face, his mouth quivered as he clenched and un-clenched his hands. He seemed to be having a hard time finding the right words and said, "I cry because I smoke a lot." W...

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Funny story: New House Leader May Dress as 'Where's Waldo' Character for State of the Union Speech

New House Leader May Dress as 'Where's Waldo' Character for State of the Union Speech

John Boehner, the new Leader of the House of Representatives, has said that he may dress as the beloved Waldo character from the "Where in the World is Waldo' children's books fame. An aide to Leader Boehner said that the final decision will rest wit...

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Funny story: Study Finds America is Second Most Violent Country

Study Finds America is Second Most Violent Country

Washington, D.C. - America has fallen behind. No, not in education, healthcare or quality of life. The US is now the second most violent country in the world. So, who is the most violent? The answer is a bit surprising. Would you believe Luxembo...

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Funny story: Red-Necked Southern Peckers Returning in Droves to Washington

Red-Necked Southern Peckers Returning in Droves to Washington

Just as the Swallows have been returning on March 19 to the Mission at San Juan Capistrano in California, so too is the red-necked southern Pecker returning to Washington, D.C. this year in record numbers. In the past, the Peckers' numbers decline...

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Funny story: GOP Leaders Reveal Their Vision Of Health Care For Americans

GOP Leaders Reveal Their Vision Of Health Care For Americans

Washington D.C. - Taking a break from the busy legislative session going on inside, Speaker of the House John Boehner lit up a cigarette on the steps of the Capitol Building and expanded on the Republican Party's idea of what health care should look...

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Funny story: The Truth Behind John "Weeper of The House" Boehner's Constant Crying

The Truth Behind John "Weeper of The House" Boehner's Constant Crying

CINCINNATI, Ohio - A man who went to high school with Speaker of the House John Boehner has told a reporter for The Cincinnati Afternoon Informant newspaper that he knows exactly why it is that Boehner is almost constantly crying when he is on televi...

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Funny story: Orange Alert: There's a Boehner in the House

Orange Alert: There's a Boehner in the House

Washington, D.C. - Capitol Hill correspondent Amethyst Ryder spoke with U.S. Representative John Boehner (R-OH) on Thursday as he settled into his new role as Speaker of the House. "There are going to be some changes around here," Boehner said as...

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Funny story: John Boehner Opens Up

John Boehner Opens Up

Washington, D.C. - House Speaker John Boehner wants everyone to know he's a regular guy. The Ohio Congressman enjoys movies and football. He loves his wife and dabbles in stamps. "I love postage," said Boehner. "Is there any better pairing than...

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Funny story: Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

(Hate Group Monthly) - Several House Republicans are outraged that the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) has added four groups to a nationwide database of colored pins on the map. This brings the number of hate groups in the U.S. even closer to t...

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Funny story: Boehner Recalls Humble Origins in Onion Factory

Boehner Recalls Humble Origins in Onion Factory

WASHINGTON - Presumptive Speaker-of-the-House John Boehner (R-Ohio) recalls his difficult upbringing. "I was one of twelve children, and we were poor. I quit school to work in the onion processing plant. We peeled and diced onions all day. Very t...

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Funny story: Sarah Palin and John Boehner Accuse Trio (Santa Claus/Julian Assange/Barack Obama) of Planning a Sex Attack on Parliament on Christmas Eve Day; WikiLeaks, X Factor, Football to be Unaffected

Sarah Palin and John Boehner Accuse Trio (Santa Claus/Julian Assange/Barack Obama) of Planning a Sex Attack on Parliament on Christmas Eve Day; WikiLeaks, X Factor, Football to be Unaffected

Superfriends Sarah Palin and John Boehner believe they have figured out the "what", the "who", and the "when" -- but the "where" and the "how" remain sketchy. Palin: "I have a source of good intelligence who tells me that those three (Santa Claus,...

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