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Funny satire stories about Earthquake

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Funny story: Medical Marijuana Dispensaries Swamped as California Prepares for Tsunami!

Medical Marijuana Dispensaries Swamped as California Prepares for Tsunami!

Lines formed around the block in San Francisco at the city's marijuana distribution points as citizens prepared for emergency conditions following an 8.9 earthquake in Japan and a Tsunami warning extending from the California coast up to Washington...

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Funny story: Unexploded WWII nuke suspected 'somewhere under Christchurch Harbour'

Unexploded WWII nuke suspected 'somewhere under Christchurch Harbour'

New Zealand - (Fallout Mess): Was a missing WWII atomic bomb behind the 6.3 magnitude tremor that struck New Zealand late last night? Official Pentagon records are having none of it of course. But the Soviet Union may be in the frame after deca...

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Funny story: Baby Doc Duvalier: I've Been Gone 25 Years. You... You All Could've Cleaned Up a Little.

Baby Doc Duvalier: I've Been Gone 25 Years. You... You All Could've Cleaned Up a Little.

Jean-Claude "Bebe Doc" Duvalier, who ruled Haiti from 1971 until his overthrow by a popular uprising in 1986, has returned to Haiti after 25 years of self-imposed exile. And he's not happy with what he sees. "I must admit, I am a little shocked...

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Funny story: UK should brace for a new Earthquake Swarm

UK should brace for a new Earthquake Swarm

During the late nineties the UK was rocked repeatedly by earthquakes measuring up to four on the Richter scale, leading to the creation of the new term "Earthquake Swarm". Back then, the earthquakes were centred on a previously unknown fault under Sa...

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Funny story: England hit by 2 earthquakes!

England hit by 2 earthquakes!

As Great Britain woke up after its extra day off they were hit by 2 earthquakes. The first was registered in Yorkshire and measured 3.6 on the Richter scale, caused hardly any harm or structural damage, but Grannies who were thrown out of their be...

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Funny story: Earthquake hits northern England - Takwana Smith and Anitakapita Jones share their story

Earthquake hits northern England - Takwana Smith and Anitakapita Jones share their story

Earthquake hits northern England. Tremors felt for miles around. A small earthquake hit northern England today. Takwana Smith and friend Anitakapta Jones, both of Cargo Fleet, Middlesbrough, were just sitting down to lunch at their favourite restaurant in Morrisons, Berwick Hills branch. Our reporter was inside the store following up on an unrelated story when the 'quake hit. When things...

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Funny story: Winter solstice/lunar eclipse seismology fallout spreads to Cumbria

Winter solstice/lunar eclipse seismology fallout spreads to Cumbria

Cumbria - (Tremors): The 3.5 quake rattled much of the Lake District today as locals blamed Druidic hankypanky on the Winter solstice for the tremor that shook their peaceful habitat. The tremor's epicentre was identified as being some 8.9 miles u...

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Funny story: Seismic double whammy as Winter solstice and lunar eclipse trigger major earthquakes

Seismic double whammy as Winter solstice and lunar eclipse trigger major earthquakes

Pacific Ocean - (Tremors): A Winter solstice delirium tremens hit South Eastern Iran today. The 7.4 magnitude quake near the holy city of Bam also triggered a seismic tipple - er...ripple!- effect that battered Japan's Bonin Isles 1,000 km south o...

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Funny story: Pakistan Flood Appeal Not Going Well

Pakistan Flood Appeal Not Going Well

Organisers of the Pakistan flood appeal, which will help in providing much-needed essentials for those affected by the terrible flooding in the country, say that progress has been 'extremely sluggish', and latest figures seem to suggest that practica...

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Funny story: Ramadan earthquake prediction rattles Iran nuke factories

Ramadan earthquake prediction rattles Iran nuke factories

Iran - (Shaikh, Rattle & Roll-over): Stargazers monitoring Iranian airspace paths of the annual Perseid meteor shower are gobsmacked. The cosmic lightshow emanating from the constellation Persia is wreaking havoc with Tuesday's new moon, hera...

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Funny story: Etch a Sketch Artist loses life's work in earthquake

Etch a Sketch Artist loses life's work in earthquake

Mr Leonardo Smith, 27, has seen his life's work destroyed in an earthquake. The Earthquake only measured 0.7 on the Richter scale, but the artist works solely on Etch a Sketches. The retro 80's favourite was seen as a fore-runner for many graphic...

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Funny story: Scientists Warn U.S. Could Be Cut In Half!

Scientists Warn U.S. Could Be Cut In Half!

Although the flow of oil has been cut off finally according to BP Oil officials, there is still much to deal with in the future, in fact the history of the United States. "Most people have heard about our earlier warnings about the Gulf floor shi...

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Funny story: DC earthquake aftershocks rattle CIA HQ

DC earthquake aftershocks rattle CIA HQ

Washington AC/DC - (Snake-in-the-Grass News): The ubiquitous 'Did the earth move for you, darlin'?' took on a new, troubling meaning today shortly after 5.04am EDT. A 3.6 tremor epicentered on the White House Queen's Bedroom was felt as far away a...

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Funny story: Cuba earthquake/tsunami fears up the ante in BP oil spill

Cuba earthquake/tsunami fears up the ante in BP oil spill

Gulf of Mexico - (Apocalyptic Mess): The US Geological Survey has issued a tsunami warning ahead of a widely anticipated Havana earthquake on Fidel Castro's 13 August birthday. The tremor monitoring agency says such a quake could lift the billions...

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Funny story: A 5.1 Magnitude Earthquake Hits Southern California - Early Reports Are That Gabourney Sidibe Was In The Area

A 5.1 Magnitude Earthquake Hits Southern California - Early Reports Are That Gabourney Sidibe Was In The Area

EL CENTRO, California - The California-Mexico border was rumbled with an earthquake measuring 5.1 on the Richter Scale. The daytime dispatcher for the El Centro Police Department, Orion Orville Fragglefaust, Jr., said that there were reports of so...

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Funny story: A 7.4 Earthquake Hits Indonesia and Amazingly Settles Down The Volcano in Iceland

A 7.4 Earthquake Hits Indonesia and Amazingly Settles Down The Volcano in Iceland

JAKARTA - A powerful 7.4 earthquake has hit the Northern Sumatra area of Indonesian causing some damage to buildings, homes, some fast food restaurants, a huge piƱata factory, and 14 whorehouses. Hung Fufi Maliwan, III, a part-time meteorologist w...

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Funny story: Boobquake - Sedighi replies

Boobquake - Sedighi replies

It has been brought to my attention that a certain Western young woman of sadly limited intellectual abilities has endeavored to call into question the unquestionable revealed truth relating to the link between earthquakes and immodesty expressed in my recent article in the Chicago Tribune, and this by means of an ill-judged "experiment" involving the massive display of so-called "tits" at various...

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