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Funny satire stories about recession

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Funny story: UK Out of Recession?

UK Out of Recession?

Industry analysts have announced that the UK is out of recession as of today. This follows on from other industry analysts announcing that we were out of recession at the beginning of December, and yet more industry analysts who have announced that w...

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Funny story: Four Whorsemen of the Acropolis stalk IMF for a handout

Four Whorsemen of the Acropolis stalk IMF for a handout

Athens - (Revelations): Conquest, war, famine, and death are all predicted for 2010 as the Greek government teeters on the verge of bankruptcy. Prime Monster Papandreou has been recalled from Yuletide retreat after Standard & Poor renamed itse...

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Funny story: One Day At The Unemployment Office

One Day At The Unemployment Office

Derek in Accounts Payable was an excitable type, but only to a certain extent. When he rounded the corner to speak to Jason, his boss, colleague and friend he was more excited than normal. The fact that he kept his voice low to avoid others hearing was indicative that it was also something serious. "I've got it Jason! It just came out of the blue and punched me in the eye!" "What is i...

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Funny story: US announce end of recession, US wanker bankers can't wait till Christmas!

US announce end of recession, US wanker bankers can't wait till Christmas!

The US is officially out of recession, it's gonna be a Merry Christmas everyone! After pumping trillions of bucks into their economy, saving corrupt bankers butts, putting Obama on top of their Christmas tree as their first "black fairy" the US g...

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Funny story: Google ends America's recession

Google ends America's recession

Branson, Missouri - The recession ended today, with the signing up of unemployed chicken gutter Vern Limburgh to Google's corporate family. He was the 147 millionth person to do so, and was America's last unemployed citizen. "I couldn't say no to...

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Funny story: Want To Read Something Really Scary? We Interview One Of The Economists Leading Us Out Of The Recession.

Want To Read Something Really Scary? We Interview One Of The Economists Leading Us Out Of The Recession.

Interviewer: What is it you do as an economist? Economist: I sit around with the boys and philosophize all day about money. Interviewer: What do you philosophize about? Economist: How the system works and how to keep it working. Interviewer: Why? Economist: So that we can keep on top of it and profit thereby. Interviewer: But who does the actual work to keep it going? Economis...

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Funny story: UK Economy Clearly Moving Out Of Recession

UK Economy Clearly Moving Out Of Recession

The Bank of England has today released further figures to support its clear contention that the UK economy is moving positively towards the roadmap for a blueprint within the overall template in the search for the merest hint of a suggestion by finan...

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Funny story: Mass Production Of TV's In UK Comes To An End

Mass Production Of TV's In UK Comes To An End

The mass production of TV's in the UK is at an end with the closure of a factory in Plymouth, Devon. For over thirty years the factory had been manufacturing transvestites, but now cheaper dresses in Poland have led the company, Tossiba, to move east...

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Funny story: Recession Affects Beavers

Recession Affects Beavers

Chicago IL: The current recession is devastating to beaver entrepreneurs. Each year the economic downturn lasts, the business smells a little worse. There was a similar slide into a deep hole after the stock market crash of 1987. Mr. Hefner a lean...

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Funny story: Money Now Worth Nothing.

Money Now Worth Nothing.

The long lasting recession has caused in many a belief that money no longer has any value. "What good is it to waste my whole day getting ready for work, going to work, working, going home from work, then spending the rest of my night recoverin...

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Funny story: New Type Of Vampire Discovered

New Type Of Vampire Discovered

A new, terrifying species of vampire has been discovered that has begun a feeding frenzy throughout the world. The horrifying part is that it haunts the least likely of places- your local bank! This vampire is a new one for the books- it feeds...

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Funny story: Walmart's and McDonald's Success In The Midst Of A Recession Proof That God Is A True Jerk.

Walmart's and McDonald's Success In The Midst Of A Recession Proof That God Is A True Jerk.

As a sign of His contempt for mankind and its ways, God has played the biggest practical joke of all time by allowing the worst exploiters of the economy and the human work force to be the only ones making a profit in the present recession. Both...

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Funny story: Obama White House Bases Economic Recovery On Internet Searches

Obama White House Bases Economic Recovery On Internet Searches

I was watching television earlier (the news on one of the networks). On the bottom was the little crawler that gives you the brief story snippets. One of those said something to this effect: The White House announced today evidence that the economic downturn has stopped and is starting to swing the other direction. They base this on the fact that 1/4 as many people have "Googled" the term "e...

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Funny story: Our Financial Leaders Are Already Planning The Next Recession.

Our Financial Leaders Are Already Planning The Next Recession.

American economic whizzes are already hard at work setting up for the next great recession. Building upon the feeble economic foundations that have already fallen once beneath them, they seek to recreate their fortunes out of the daydreams of the...

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Funny story: Flash: Sarah Palin cashes in. Monkeys Pass on McDonald's. Healthcare in a Congressional Coma.

Flash: Sarah Palin cashes in. Monkeys Pass on McDonald's. Healthcare in a Congressional Coma.

(New York-NY) "The New York Times" published an editor's note this week stating pictures used in the paper's Sunday Magazine photo essay were digitally manipulated. The pictorial was shot by Portuguese photographer Edgar Martins, and called "Ruins o...

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Funny story: Repeal on hunting ban to beat recession stress

Repeal on hunting ban to beat recession stress

The Tories revealed today that their main priority during the recession will be to launch a campaign to repeal the ban on fox hunting. Conservative Shadow Justice Minister Egbert Garnier said the ban on hunting with hounds, which came into force in F...

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Funny story: Detroit To Be Dismantled And Moved To Chicago.

Detroit To Be Dismantled And Moved To Chicago.

What was left of the city of Detroit was dismantled and shipped to Illinois this week. The Motor City, long beset by declines in the automotive industry and general economy, has given up the ghost as a separate city entity and will be rebuilt as...

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