You can't keep a good news story down, and, even though the following aren't exactly what you would call 'good news stories', they aren't exactly shite either, and so here they are, for your perusal:
CONCERNS OVER MUSLIM UPRISING
There were 'gr...
Another hectic day in the steaming, stinking metropolis of Bangkok, and nowhere in the metropolis is it more steamy and stinky than at the Bangkok Zoo, from where our intrepid reporter Donkey Wooms brings you these headlines.
CRAP MURALS REPAINTED...
Hello, good morning and welcome to another gripping instalment of Thai Daily News. A somewhat mundane day in the capital, Bangkok, today, it has to be said, but from the remnants, here are the day's boring headlines, brought to you by our sponsors, F...
After another exciting day on the streets of Bangkok, here are the main news stories brought to you by a waster with nothing better to do than to bore you with them.
WOMAN'S TIT SEEN THROUGH BLOUSE
News has just come in that a foreign passenger...
Rescuers are still trying to locate people buried under the rubble of last week's earthquake in Haiti, but it's also been a particularly busy day in the Thai capital of Bangkok today, where several stories have caught the eye.
For details, here i...
The aroma assaults me
The heat is intense
Choking on chillis
To me, makes no sense
But here is all life
And all life is here
The noodles, the men, the women, the beer
The vendor surveys me
Her stare is intense
She throws in more chillis
She can't comprehend
A farang in her shop?
It doesn't make sense
But why complain
If he's willing to spend?
I survey the menu
But 'Mai kow ja...
Limericks are fun, aren't they, children? And they're easy to write too. There are five lines in a limerick, with the first, second and last lines rhyming with each other, and the third and fourth lines rhyming with each other as well. There's a simple 3, 3, 2, 2, 3 syllable pattern as well.
Limericks were a great source of fun in the long-ago days when there were no Playstations, and there was...
You are my refuge, my Big Shoppe,
You save my life, ev'ry day,
When I dither in your car park,
Trying to decide what to eat today -
You show me the way,
To the supermarket,
In your basement underbelly.
Oh, the aisles! There are so many!
And plentifully stocked,
But the locals and their trolleys,
Keep them permanently blocked -
You show me the way,
To an empty till,
Where a girl eage...
There was deep consternation amongst local Bangkok residents yesterday after it was discovered that an expatriate English teacher living in their midst had undertaken a domestic duty normally reserved for the fairer sex (women) - he had ironed a shir...
It might seem like a strange kind of pet to many people, but one Englishman living in Thailand has adopted what seems to be the perfect live-in companion for his Bangkok apartment - a cockroach!
Monkey Woods, originally from Hull in East Yorkshire...
It was supposed to be a friendly round of the much-loved family word game Scrabble, played out in the surroundings of a Thai primary school between an English teacher and his students, but what happened next turned into an ugly brawl that will long r...
There was panic then total relief in Thailand today when an English teacher in Bangkok thought he'd shit himself, but, as luck would have it, had only farted in his underkegs!
The man - me, of course - had just finished eating his horrible dinner...
There was near-pandemonium in a Bangkok school this lunchtime, when an English teacher originally from Hull in East Yorkshire, spotted the upset remnants of a child's dinner on the stairs, but refused to do anything about it, and left it right where...
There was drama 'in store' for shoppers at a large supermarket chain in Thailand on Thursday, when a man became lost in amongst the superstore's vast number of aisles, and had to be rescued by a search party.
Moys Kenwood, originally from Hull in...
It should have been a fun experience, and an enjoyable lesson in English for a group of students in the Thai eastern seaboard resort of Pattaya this week, but the dream turned into a nightmare for them and their teacher, after he attempted to teach t...
Dudley, UK/ Swine Flu and STI News - Following a slow breaking UK story where a man from Dudley was forced out of his habitat that he had occupied for nigh on 40 years by an odoriferous fanny of a nearby neighbor, public interest in Yeast Infections...
A British man living in the Thai eastern seaboard resort of Pattaya caused pandemonium yesterday when, after taking a piss and passing a pebble-sized kidney stone, he launched the offending article off his 9th floor balcony and straight through the w...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!