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Funny story: Vermont Bans Rap Music

Vermont Bans Rap Music

MONTPELIER, Vermont - The Vermont state senate has just voted on a music bill which is the first of its kind in the entire United States. Congressman Cooperton Blizzardbinster, 68, told the news media that after every state congressman received hu...

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Funny story: Senator Joe Manchin has Existential Crisis after Reading Facebook Comment

Senator Joe Manchin has Existential Crisis after Reading Facebook Comment

Facebook vigilante, Bobby D. Foster's has struck yet another Senator. The unprovoked Facebook comment reads as follows: Dear Senator Manchin, I just wanted to inform you that I am quite disappointed that your chin is not as manly as you name suggests. Have a nice day. -BDF The Senator has reportedly not shown up to a single congressional session since he read the post last Thursday.

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Funny story: U.S. Congress Sets Fixed Price on Free Speech

U.S. Congress Sets Fixed Price on Free Speech

A bill explicitly stating that citizens will be allocated 1 second of free speech for every $10,000 of pre-taxable income they earn per year has made its way through the Senate subcommittee process. The following is a transcript of the final hearing. 2012 A BILL TO CODIFY, GUARD, AND BOLSTER FREE SPEECH RIGHTS IN THE UNITED STATES HEARING BEFORE THE SUBCOMMITTEE ON THE CONSTITUTION,...

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Funny story: Learning How to Lobby on Capitol Hill

Learning How to Lobby on Capitol Hill

Congratulations! Your fresh out of collage, and you have decided to embark on a career as a Capitol Hill lobbyist. One of many things that you must always keep forefront in your mind is that you are joining the ranks of an exclusive prestigious club where access is earned through hard work and using your head. There is much to be gained if you are up to the task at hand. The people who you wil...

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Funny story: Senator Mitch McConnell Morphs into Chipmunk on Senate Floor - Rabies Suspected!

Senator Mitch McConnell Morphs into Chipmunk on Senate Floor - Rabies Suspected!

According to eye witnesses, it was a scene like never before witnessed in US Senate history. Senator Mitch McConnell (R-Kentucky) observers noted over the years looks very similar to a chipmunk had actually morphed into a giant a rodent right before...

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Funny story: Mississippi Has Just Outlawed "Hoodies"

Mississippi Has Just Outlawed "Hoodies"

JACKSON, Mississippi - The state of Mississippi Senate has stated that in an effort to avoid what has occurred in Sanford, Florida, they will be enacting a state senatorial directive. Mississippi State Senatorial Directive T-17003 is to take effec...

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Funny story: Congress Strikes Back: Gives Taxpayers a 4% Approval Rating

Congress Strikes Back: Gives Taxpayers a 4% Approval Rating

Washington -- Still stinging from the lowly 10% approval rating it received from the American public, Congress has taken revenge, bestowing a measly four percent approval rating on taxpaying citizens. "Taxpayers are doing a terrible job of providi...

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Funny story: Ron Johnson doing the least amount of work in the Senate

Ron Johnson doing the least amount of work in the Senate

Washington--Senator Ron Johnson of Wisconsin promised that he would fix America and that he would work hard to fix the tax code, but that was just doublespeak for hiding in his office, while staring at his poster of Ayn Rand. "I spent a lot of e...

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Funny story: Octomom Condemns Congressional Debt Talks, Commends End of NFL Lockout

Octomom Condemns Congressional Debt Talks, Commends End of NFL Lockout

During an unprecedented and controversial meeting with various news organizations Monday morning, Nadya Suleman-known nationwide in the media as "Octomom"-spoke out against the recent U.S. Congressional debate concerning the federal debt ceiling.

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Funny story: Congress cracks the debt ceiling; crisis triggered when Boehner borrows a twenty from Obama

Congress cracks the debt ceiling; crisis triggered when Boehner borrows a twenty from Obama

Washington, DC - The request was innocent enough. Representative John Boehner (R-Ohio) asked president Barack Obama if he could borrow $20 to pay for his lunch in the Congressional cafeteria. But when the president handed over the cash, all hell b...

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Funny story: Senate bans summer vacations for all Americans

Senate bans summer vacations for all Americans

Washington, DC - "If we Senators have to miss out on our summer vacations, then everyone is going to miss out on their summer vacations." Those angry words came from Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, as he gaveled home a law which prohibits Amer...

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Funny story: State of Union becomes 51st State

State of Union becomes 51st State

Shortly after president Obama's State of the Union speech a group of influential senators and congressmen from both parties met to discuss legislation that would leapfrog the competitors in the global race for economic dominance. After a few cou...

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Funny story: Fried Squirrel Replaces Bean Soup at Senate Cafeteria

Fried Squirrel Replaces Bean Soup at Senate Cafeteria

The US Senate cafeteria has been renowned for its bean soup. In a bulletin released today, cafeteria management announced that it is replacing the famous bean Soup with fried squirrel. The statement reads in part: "In an effort to keep up with th...

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Funny story: Opinions from an Unemployed Maverick Senator

Opinions from an Unemployed Maverick Senator

Eighteen years in the Senate taught me, Russ Feingold, that being bitter about losing my job to Ron Johnson. A man that campaigned with the promise that he was going to create jobs, well, my job is gone. I can't wait to see what Mr. Johnson does for this unemployed Senator. I worked hard for the people of Wisconsin and this is the thanks they give me. They give me the boot. I promised to c...

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Funny story: Congress Passes American Incontinence Act of 2010 To Provide Free Adult Diapers To Senior Citizens

Congress Passes American Incontinence Act of 2010 To Provide Free Adult Diapers To Senior Citizens

In their last act on Friday before adjourning for the weekend, the United States Senate ratified a bill already passed by the House of Representatives. The new law, called the American Incontinence Act of 2010, now goes to President Obama for his si...

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Funny story: Senate clears way for Obama's small 'package'

Senate clears way for Obama's small 'package'

WASHINGTON, DC - The Senate on Tuesday advanced Obama's 'package' for small business but failed to relieve millions of companies from the fear of being 'upped in the cadbury's' by the federal government. Two Republicrats joined Demolickans in the...

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Funny story: Senate Committee to Subpoena Mother Nature

Senate Committee to Subpoena Mother Nature

WASHINGTON, DC - Senate Homeland Security and Government Affairs chairman Joseph I. Lieberman issued a subpoena for Mother Nature to explain why Hurricane Earl failed to cause substantial damage as predicted by most cable news networks. "The feder...

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