On the day following the Buckingham Palace security breach where two journalists from the News of the Smut were found calmly sitting in the Royal Motorcade Car, yet another security breach has been discovered in H M the Queen's residence. In the e...
Jade Goody's mother Jackiey Budden sparked a security scare at Gatwick airport yesterday after joking that she was carrying a pig in her luggage. The 51-year-old was strip-searched and questioned for 45 minutes after making the ill-advised quip du...
London, England - The Metropolitan Police today, in attempt to divert attention from the fact that one of their number twatted a woman with a baton during the G20 fiasco, today chose to announce that they had almost arrested a TheSpoof.com writer on...
Chairman of United Widgets PLC "Dancing Derek Doublenose" and his faithful Chauffeur Terry today arrived at their office in the city dressed as Kermit and Miss Piggy after following incorrect advice from Security to come "In fancy dress" today. Mr...
A report commissioned by the Government into the use of security and other CCTV cameras in the capital has discovered that there are now more cameras in London than there are people. With the average camera costing £2000 to deploy this means that...
Pounduniverse, the British high street budget retailer is to shed two thousand jobs across the country in a bid to cut costs. All the jobs will be in the security aspect of the company, with every security guard axed. "It makes commercial sense...
When David Beckham appears for AC Milan in Dubai he will be surrounded by the biggest security operation ever undertaken by the state. 'We are determined to protect Mister Beckham,' said a Dubai security chappie. 'We will not tolerate bombings, sh...
In the last 2 years, there have been several embarrassing news stories describing how sensitive Government data has been "lost" - everything from people's medical records to names of MI5 agents have been copied on to CDs or memory sticks which have...
Charter Industrial Applications announced today their new suite of Picture Perfect Pets home security systems applications. The interactive home protection devices are available in a wide range of species including the popular Tribble from the ori...
Airport Alert - Washington DC In perhaps one of the most embarrassing flight delays in presidential campaigning, Flight 1052, US Air from Miami to Washington was stopped today when a personal vibrating device fell and went off. Senator Joseph Bid...
In an unprecedented move earlier today an MI6 Public Relations Officer released a statement, admitting that Neasden hard-man and crime kingpin Arthur Pewty is under close surveillance. 'MI6 can confirm this morning that Mr Arthur Pewty of Neasden...
Britain went into meltdown yesterday teatime following news that 53 year old ne'er do well Arthur Pewty was rumoured to be going out for a pint. RAF Fighter Command was put on standby, the SAS were recalled from leave, Gordon Brown convened an eme...
Nectarines Geldof, the world famous moron impersonator, who shot to fame through, er, because, er, as a result of, er because of her daddy, has made two fantastic discoveries which may well rock all over the world (not in the same way as entertainers...
The Home Office, Scotland Yard, MI5, MI6, DIY and MFI have today released details of the stalker who has been attempting to stalk (which is what stalkers do) the Prime Minister. The actions of this stalker had prompted a huge increase in the level...
Washington, D.C. - There was frenzied speculation inside the Beltway yesterday after it was revealed that President Bush had ordered all of the White House locks changed. A spokesperson for the White House said that this was nothing more than a regul...
MI6 has today revealed that yet more important documents have been left on a train despite recent publicity and a tightening up of procedures.
WASHINGTON, DC - The US Department of Commerce has refused to comment on a report stating that Chinese officials may have secretly copied the contents of a government laptop reported to have contained some highly sensitive, top-secret pornography.
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