London - She's been quick to pack Philip off to the Hellfire Club's Final Daze Spa & Crematorium at the latest episode of chronic malingering according to Palace sources. This weekend advertisements in the Autumn issues of The Oldie, Fox N Hou...
Balmoral - "He's been short of breasts - er...breath! - ever since hearing that a 30-stone Belarus woman shot-putter's been stripped," a Castle footman claimed today. "Then doctors found a curious lump developing on HRH's er, person, accompanied b...
Her Majesty the Queen has decided that as from next Tuesday the river Thames is to be renamed the 'River Queen Elizabeth II' in her honour. The Prime Minister has been informed of the decision. It was explained to the Prime Minister that she no lo...
In a statement Buckingham Palace has confirmed that after Queen Elizabeth's fake helicopter jump for the Olympic opening ceremony, her Majesty is to make a real jump from a helicopter. Her Majesty will make the jump this Tuesday at noon. The h...
Today's headline news - that Prince Philip has been released from hospital - has been widely reported, but only SEN's Verity Warbling-Trollblog got the real inside scoop on the story, by revealing that the Prince must keep a quail's egg in his underp...
Speculation in the Great Britain is mounting that Prince Phillip, The Duke of Edinburgh and husband of the Queen missed the sovereign's Diamond Jubilee celebrations because he has contracted the Zombie virus which has now infected over 2,000,000 worl...
The mood was dampened today on the Queens Diamond Jubilee celebration, as a rogue MP claimed that Prince Philip should have two days pay deducted for missing the last two of the four day celebration. Philip, who was 90 in February, was admitted to...
London - A dreadful SMS mistake involving just one digit has seen Dr Rowan Williams receive some amusing Diamond Jubilee pics on his mobile phone. The 'Whoa, gedda load of this, darlin!' signed off with 'Randy Bunnykins' messages were apparently m...
London - Holed up in a grotty geriatric ward at London's King Edward Potatoes Clinic for Past-it Duffers the Duke of Edinburgh had a terrifying vision last night. Apparently someone told him that a once-in-a-lifetime Sun-Venus conjunction on Tuesd...
Windsor - Prince Philip has been hospitalised with a bladder infection after using some dodgy facilities on yesterday's boat trip. Apparently he was heard complaining loudly about 'having to share the blasted bog' with the Middleton family and the...
It's been a long time coming, but Prince Philip has finally been declared a 'National Treasure' following his outstanding performance at the Diamond Jubilee Pageant. Where it pissed down all day. The 90 year old consort to HRH - who hitherto ha...
Following Prince Philip's Friday night "Stuff the ruddy buggering Diamond Jubilee!" tirade, Buckingham Palace staff were forced to flee the building again on Saturday evening, when the Prince flatly refused to go on a glorified barge in the Great Jub...
Buckingham Palace staff ran for cover Friday night when the Duke of Edinburgh flew into a rage, when Her Majesty suggested that he ought to retire to his bed at ten pm, as the Royal Family were facing quite a hectic weekend, and that he ought to get...
London - There were red faces at the Palace of Westmonster today as an Anti-Social Behavior Order electronic tag worn by the Duke of Edinburgh was seen by millions on live TV. Apparently he got it for a racist rant at some Palace underling paid ne...
Following the discovery of a dead body on their Sandringham estate, the Royal Family has categorically denied that the body is that of a member of the public who was shot by Prince Philip. The Prince, who had spent Christmas in hospital followin...
Norfolk - And it's off with the intravenous drip and straight back to the family fold for Prince Philip where the traditional post-Boxing Day shooting party awaited him in Sandringham's Golden Triangle Wing. La Famiglia's customary pot shots at in...
After one too many "and what do you do's" and accusations of oderlies having "not defended their homelands against Hitler", Prince Philip was politely requested by two 34-stone hospital security guards to leave Papworth Hospital in Cambridgeshire whe...
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