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Funny satire stories about Polls

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Funny story: Twenty percent of Americans trust politicians unequivocally

Twenty percent of Americans trust politicians unequivocally

A recent survey asked Americans how much faith they have in their leaders among other related questions.

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Funny story: Ron Paul Winning Spoof Poll

Ron Paul Winning Spoof Poll

Ron Paul is winning yet another internet poll in the 2008 presidential election. On The Spoof, the most popular website in the world among Web 1.7 based satirical British news web...

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Funny story: Ron Paul Surges in Polls

Ron Paul Surges in Polls

Ron Paul is gaining in opinion polls in key states in the presidential GOP nomination race for 2008.

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Funny story: ABC News Online Besmirches Its Own Polls

ABC News Online Besmirches Its Own Polls

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - "The Internets" - In an article on ABCNews.go.com, Rick Klein flat out lies about the ABC Internet Polls, claiming that its voters voted multiple times for Ron Paul. The article reads,...

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Funny story: Blair Welcomes Britain's Success in UN Poverty Poll

Blair Welcomes Britain's Success in UN Poverty Poll

Prime minister Tony Blair today welcomed the news that Britain had come out top in the latest UN poverty poll by saying: "It goes to prove what I've been saying all along, that if the country wants to keep up this consistent high level of ac...

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Funny story: New Poll: 75% of Republicans Won't Vote in November Election

New Poll: 75% of Republicans Won't Vote in November Election

A new Gallup poll, taken between August 29 and Sept 5, 2006, shows that rank and file Republicans have become so disillusioned with their party's leadership, that most are not likely to go to the polls this November.

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Funny story: ER For Bush Polls

ER For Bush Polls

Alarmed by sickening poll figures and fearing the upcoming November election, the Bush White House has formulated a prescription for success called: ER For Bush Polls. Though not running for public office, the President's men suspect that the com...

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Funny story: Cheney popularity rockets after attorney take down

Cheney popularity rockets after attorney take down

Pollsters revealed yesterday Vice President Dick Cheney's popularity has had a massive lift in the aftermath of attorney shooting. Polls taken before the shooting showed Cheney's popularity with voters was at an all time low of 12 percent favorab...

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Funny story: Latest Polls: Election Hinges on Single Undecided Voter

Latest Polls: Election Hinges on Single Undecided Voter

After weeks of differing and fluctuating back and forth, the state-by-state polls for the presidential race now agree that the race will once again come down to Florida, and that the Sunshine State itself comes down to one undecided voter. 68-year o...

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Funny story: Bush Dead Keen For Votes

Bush Dead Keen For Votes

The Whitehouse today released a statement suggesting President Bush may stand down if he fails to win the election outright when the nation goes to the polls on November 2.

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Funny story: John Kerry Holds Slim Lead over George W. Bush in 49 States

John Kerry Holds Slim Lead over George W. Bush in 49 States

The latest polls show that John F. Kerry holds a teeny weenie, slight, barely measurable, 95.5% to 3.2% lead over George W. Bush.

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Funny story: President Cancels Debates

President Cancels Debates

After the president's disastrous performance in the first debate, and recognizing Senator Kerry's jump in the polls, actually his leap, catapult, cannon shot, rocket after burn, volcanic blow, all of the above, the White House announced the P...

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Funny story: Zogby Poll Admits: We Were Trying To Let Bush Down Easy

Zogby Poll Admits: We Were Trying To Let Bush Down Easy

In a press release today Rebecca (Beckaroo) Wittman, Vice President, Managing Editor of Zogby International admitted to manipulating the numbers on certain Zogby presidential polls. Wittman said that full disclosure would be forthcoming and that the...

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Funny story: Nader will keep campaigning after election

Nader will keep campaigning after election

BOSTON -- With polls showing a narrowing gap between President Bush and Sen. John Kerry, Ralph Nader said that he planned to continue campaigning after the election is over.

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Funny story: John Kerry Foreign Policy Clarified

John Kerry Foreign Policy Clarified

Democratic presidential nominee Senator John Kerry has moved swiftly to clarify his Foreign Policy. Polls reflect Kerry is suffering substantial damage in the face of the latest Bush bounce and foreign policy is considered to be the achiles heel of h...

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Funny story: Polls show national depression lifting as Ronald Reagan is finally buried

Polls show national depression lifting as Ronald Reagan is finally buried

After almost a week of ongoing funereal festivities, recent polls show that Americans are beginning to feel happier now that former President Ronald Reagan has finally been laid to rest.

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Funny story: George W. Bush Declares Martial Law

George W. Bush Declares Martial Law

President George W. Bush has taken the unique step of declaring Martiall Law without the country having either been attacked or being under imminent threat of attack. Administration Officials, concerned about falling public opinion polls and the real...

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