THE PENTAGON (AP)-- A new draft US defense paper calls for preventive nuclear strikes against any foreign state if its people don't buy enough audio CDs by Britney Spears or some other American musician.
Washington, DC (AP)-The recent outbreak of nanobug "eaters" which has reduced the immense Pentagon building to a "gray goo" has been contained, claimed Colonel Bull Buntline at a hastily called and sparsely attended news conference at a Howard Johnso...
Larry Franklin, 58, Kearneysville, W.Va., a Pentagon analyst has leaked documents and scientific papers that show the US military could soon benefit from an enhanced military capability - home grown dinosaurs ready to fight any conflict anywhere in t...
The Pentagon.-"Jeff Bezos had better watch out!" ejaculated Secretary of Defense Don Rumsfeld today as he answered questions from the press about Pakistan's purchase of U.S. made F-16s.
The Wailing Wall, Thursday (Rioters) - The Pentagon as announced that a high-ranking Iran specialist has been arrested at the Israeli embassy in Tel Aviv and charged with espionage.
The Pentagon press corps was embarrassed by Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld's "coming out" announcement this morning at the 9 A. M. briefing. Mr. Rumsfeld, normally conservative in appearance and manner, seemed uncharacteristically at ease as he...
The man American Theater Commander General Tommy Franks called the "F---ing stupidest guy on the face of the Earth," Douglas Feith, the former Under Secretary of Defense for Policy, has resigned his position at the Pentagon to open pork barbeque sta...
WASHINGTON (AP) Sources at the Pentagon revealed today that a totally new design is on the table for the next US Air Force supersonic fighter plane. Major General Richard Lemasters said, "The Air Force requires a plane that is fast, easy to fly,...
With some critics calling for him to be stripped naked and led out of the Pentagon on a dog leash, Donald Rumsfeld stepped up the campaign to save his skin by announcing a lavish compensation package (including Halliburton stock options and McDonalds...
Pentagon officials, in conjunction with Rhino Records, have announced the formation of a new boy band based in Iraq, named "Bad Dad and The Masked Killers." Bag Dad, the lead singer and only American of the bunch, will perform naked at concerts, w...
Bosnia -- The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Richard Myers, showed up late and for the wrong war today, Pentagon sources told The Spoof. Apparently, General Myers took a wrong turn at Turkey and ended up in Bosnia.
Citing their excellent record for arranging the attendance of uniformed applaud-on-demand flag-wavers, the Bush-Cheney 2004 Re-Election Committee proudly announced the awarding of the Campaign Rally Location Contract to the Pentagon.
Now that the number of U.S. soldiers killed in Iraq since the March 20 invasion has topped 500, the Pentagon has announced an enhanced version of its "stop-loss" policy to minimize troop losses during the occupation.
Documents obtained from the now famous briefcase that was in Saddam's possession down in that "spider hole" have yielded a plot so sinister and frightening that one Pentagon senior official called it, "...disturbing."...
The Pentagon has announced a review of internal security following the revelation of the identity of an undercover reporter for The Spoof. Donald H. Rumsfeld has been working as Secretary of Defense at the Pentagon since January 2001 after applying u...
The US military has put on hold a controversial $380 deal to buy McHubert hamburgers.
The Pentagon has made an official announcement to confirm as true the rumours that the American Government has set about creating the world's first infallible spy.
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