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Funny story: Scientists discover new species of fish

Scientists discover new species of fish

PAPUA, NEW GUINEA - Scientists know it as "pacu," but the natives of New Guinea refer to the same marine species as the "fellatio fish." "It's a real ball-sucker," Jimmy Wade told this reporter. "Sometimes, the fish goes even further, becoming a real...

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Funny story: Republicans Have Turned into Duck Penises

Republicans Have Turned into Duck Penises

Several members of the Republican Party have transformed into duck penises. The mysterious condition began to take hold soon after they expressed outrage at a government funded research project on duck penises. Like the sexual anatomy of the male...

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Funny story: Giant hanging penis discovered in Amazon forest!

Giant hanging penis discovered in Amazon forest!

Amazon Forest, somewhere in Brazil: A huge hanging penis has been discovered by anthropologists studying hidden, indigenous tribes in the Amazon rainforests. The discovery is a sensation because never before has a living penis been discovered with...

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Funny story: Developers of Penis Keyboard Give Up, Saying It Just Won't Work

Developers of Penis Keyboard Give Up, Saying It Just Won't Work

A once promising high-tech startup company that had hoped to market a computer keyboard that allowed men to type with their penis has gone out of business.  "We had high hopes for 'The Squirty Qwerty,' said Munsen Funjit, marketing manager of the...

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Funny story: Orb-Web Spider's Removable Penis Finishes Without Him. Lucky Orb-Spider.

Orb-Web Spider's Removable Penis Finishes Without Him. Lucky Orb-Spider.

Orb-Web Spider's Removable Penis Finishes Without Him. Lucky Orb-Spider. Dig if you will a picture: It's 6:30AM. You have 45 minutes to shit, shower and shave before you trudge off to the job that is slowly sucking your life-force away. Ripping Your Own Yogurt Chucker Off, Mid-hump, Makes As Much Sense... ... as calling a story with no actual names "too defamatory". Sadly, both happen more...

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Funny story: Penis Bomber Thwarted at Boston's Logan Airport

Penis Bomber Thwarted at Boston's Logan Airport

BOSTON, MA ---The FBI thwarted a suspected would-be-suicide bomber scheduled to fly Laker Airways flight 666 to London's Heathrow airport. The 'man' in custody is identified as Gregory Pecker. FBI agents are still in the early stage of the investigat...

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Funny story: Romney loses penis, blames Secret Service

Romney loses penis, blames Secret Service

ROMNEY, WV (ABSNN) Republican front-runner Mitt Romney lost his penis somewhere in Pennsylvania. He blames his Secret Service protection detail. The news of the lost penis was made public this morning in this tiny West Virginia town on the Maryland...

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Funny story: Howard Stern's Tiny Penis Is Growing Bigger From Being An America's Got Talent Judge

Howard Stern's Tiny Penis Is Growing Bigger From Being An America's Got Talent Judge

Shock Jock Howard Stern, who for many years has made it public information that his penis is tiny, itsie bitsie, little and embarrassing in general, has been astounded by the results he has been getting from being a judge on the popular television sh...

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Funny story: Bad girl Miley Cyrus snapped getting down and dirty with giant penis cake at birthday

Bad girl Miley Cyrus snapped getting down and dirty with giant penis cake at birthday

Yes you heard it right Sweet innocent little Miley Cyrus was heard saying at a birthday party, "she loved the taste of that sweet black penis". And why wouldn't she love the taste. It was an X-rated birthday cake she had purchased for her BF Liam...

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Funny story: Theologians discover the Judgement Day Staff is a sexual reference

Theologians discover the Judgement Day Staff is a sexual reference

"And on judgement day, He will walk among us with his staff held erect," says Revelations 12:8. "We have been looking at this phrase for the past two thousand years," said Biblical scholar, Samuel Ahmed. "And it was only yesterday when we realised that when God bestrides the earth at the end of days, he will do so with his cock out. It certainly is a book of revelations!" Based on this rem...

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Funny story: TSA falsely accuses man of transporting snake and tortoises, finds instead man's huge genitals

TSA falsely accuses man of transporting snake and tortoises, finds instead man's huge genitals

MIAMI, Florida--TSA screeners at Miami International Airport ordered that a man be held for transporting an exotic snake and two tortoises. A strip search revealed that the man instead sported an extremely long penis and large scrotum. Billy Sande...

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Funny story: Back home: Strauss-Kahn arrives in French Capital, Two Stewardess, A Pilot, and One Nun Acuse Him of Copping A Feel

Back home: Strauss-Kahn arrives in French Capital, Two Stewardess, A Pilot, and One Nun Acuse Him of Copping A Feel

In Paris, the much maligned Strauss-Kahn arrived to a cheering and jeering crowd of people. But before he could even step off the plane, word came that Air France would be launching an investigation of Mr Dominique Strauss-Kahn's behavior during the...

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Funny story: Penis Biometrics Installed In Vatican City

Penis Biometrics Installed In Vatican City

A New era in Vatican security has been realized today. The introduction of Genital Biometrics to Vatican City, brings with it much hope for the rehabilitation of Holy Mother Church's reputation. This high tech solution to an age old problem is the cu...

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Funny story: Who Would Have Suspected That Men Have a Second Brain In Their.... Um.... 'Naughty Bits'?

Who Would Have Suspected That Men Have a Second Brain In Their.... Um.... 'Naughty Bits'?

Physiological scientists have made an amazing discovery in that man (and we mean specifically 'man' here, not 'wo-man') much like the dinosaurs of ancient times possess a second brain located at an extremity of the body. Both man and dinosaurs have t...

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Funny story: Finger length gives clue to size of manhood, say scientists

Finger length gives clue to size of manhood, say scientists

THE length of a man's fingers gives a clue to the size of his manhood. An index finger that is shorter than the ring finger may indicate a longer penis, according to scientists. Previous studies have shown strong evidence that testosterone in t...

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Funny story: Crop Circle Discovered In Pensioner's Garden

Crop Circle Discovered In Pensioner's Garden

[Burnley Echo] Conspiracy theorists were buzzing today after photographs were published of what appears to be a crop circle in a pensioner's garden. The out-of-this-world design, which resembles a giant penis, was first spotted by eager-eyed grandmot...

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Funny story: The Isle of Wight to ban the use of the words 'penis' and 'vagina'

The Isle of Wight to ban the use of the words 'penis' and 'vagina'

Adult residents of the Isle of Wight are moving, quickly, towards removing the words 'penis' and 'vagina' from use on the Isle. Islanders are tired of their children Googling the words and looking up You Tube videos with the two words in the title...

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