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Funny satire stories about New England Patriots

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Funny story: Two Men Arrested In A Plot To Break Aaron Hernandez Out of Prison

Two Men Arrested In A Plot To Break Aaron Hernandez Out of Prison

DARTMOUTH, Massachusetts - A spokesperson for The Bristol County House of Corrections has just announced that a plot to break out former New England Patriots wide receiver Aaron Hernandez out of jail has been foiled. Two men identified as Sheridan...

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Funny story: Tim Tebow, Who Is Now A Free Agent, Could Be Getting A Call From The Green Bay Packers

Tim Tebow, Who Is Now A Free Agent, Could Be Getting A Call From The Green Bay Packers

GREEN BAY - The Green Bay Packers have just done something that no other NFL team in recent memory has ever done. They have just cut four quarterbacks, B.J. Coleman, Vince Young, Derek Mango, and Hunter Dillstromdinger and are now left with only o...

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Funny story: Tim Tebow Cut By The New England Patriots

Tim Tebow Cut By The New England Patriots

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Tim Tebow learned that he had been cut from the New England Patriots and he took it all in stride. He told Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review that it's just business and like they say in Pittsburgh that's just the...

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Funny story: Tim Tebow's Kind Gesture Amazes All Of His Fellow New England Patriot Teammates

Tim Tebow's Kind Gesture Amazes All Of His Fellow New England Patriot Teammates

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Newly acquired Patriots player Tim Tebow knows how to win over his fellow players, coaches, and even fans. The man who is number 5 in the Patriots program has now become number 1 in the hearts of many at PatsLand. Te...

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Funny story: Belichick: No idea where Hernandez learned criminal disregard of others

Belichick: No idea where Hernandez learned criminal disregard of others

FOXBORO, MA--Speaking publicly for the first time about the murder charges facing former tight end Aaron Hernandez, Patriots head coach Bill Belichick emphasized that pathological wrongdoing and a lack of empathy for others were not the kind of v...

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Funny story: Aaron Hernandez Will Not Be Having A Prison Wedding

Aaron Hernandez Will Not Be Having A Prison Wedding

BRISTOL COUNTY, Massachusetts - Aaron Hernandez is in a world of trouble and the ex-$8 million per year New England Patriots player cannot even afford to pay for a Get Out of Jail Free Card. In the span of just a few short weeks Hernandez has gone...

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Funny story: The Aaron Hernandez Bobblehead Dolls - The Good News and The Bad News

The Aaron Hernandez Bobblehead Dolls - The Good News and The Bad News

CHICAGO - The Hasbroken Toy Company that manufactures the Aaron Hernandez Bobblehead Doll has just made an announcement regarding the ex-New England Patriots player. Company spokesperson, Zandreeka LaSheena Lovecake, 29, said that they will be rec...

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Funny story: New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick Says Tim Tebow Will Replace Aaron Hernandez

New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick Says Tim Tebow Will Replace Aaron Hernandez

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Coach Bill Belichick is still in a state of semi-shock regarding former Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez. Belichick spoke with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and stated that upon reflection he now realizes that some o...

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Funny story: Aaron Hernandez of The New England Patriots Arrested - Gisele Bundchen Is Furious

Aaron Hernandez of The New England Patriots Arrested - Gisele Bundchen Is Furious

NORTH ATTLEBORO, Massachusetts - Well like the saying goes, You can run but you can't hide. Police have arrested Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez and charged him with suspicion of murder. Hernandez told Rufus Reno with Sports Balls Illustrated D...

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Funny story: Police Warn New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez To Turn Himself In Or They'll Sell His House

Police Warn New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez To Turn Himself In Or They'll Sell His House

NORTH ATTLEBORO, Massachusetts - The North Attleboro Police Department has informed the news media that they are tired of New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez playing games with them. The Pats receiver has been told to turn himself in to...

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Funny story: New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez Could End Up Playing Football In Prison

New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez Could End Up Playing Football In Prison

NORTH ATTLEBORO, Massachusetts - It appears that New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez has just found himself in a great big 44-gallon drum of hot water. Police have issued an arrest warrant for #81 on three different grounds. Hernandez i...

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Funny story: Vladimir Putin: What The Heck Would I Want With A Super Bowl Ring?

Vladimir Putin: What The Heck Would I Want With A Super Bowl Ring?

BOSTON - The owner of the New England Patriots Robert Kraft has stated that his trip to Russia was not exactly a pleasant one. The Pats owner told Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Gazette that as he and President Putin were having dinner at Mosc...

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Funny story: The New England Patriots Sign Tim Tebow

The New England Patriots Sign Tim Tebow

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Coach Bill Belichick has said that he really feels that Tim Tebow can help the Pats. The New England coach spoke with Rufus Reno of Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and said that he still is not sure how he will use Tebow...

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Funny story: White Smoke from the Patriots on Tim Tebow

White Smoke from the Patriots on Tim Tebow

The word out of Foxboro lately is white smoke. Cardinal Bill Belichick is leading the conclave, and he has chosen to elect Tim Tebow to the team. Tebow was never a serious contender for the Patriots' big job, which is tied up for the foreseeable f...

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Funny story: Father Bill Belichick Runs Patriots Version of Boys Town

Father Bill Belichick Runs Patriots Version of Boys Town

Alonzo Dennard, wayward boy of the New England Patriots, has been sentenced to serve thirty days in Nebraska at Boys Town Prison. Since he usually spends his time at Father Bill Belichick's home for wayward youth, this will be a piece of cake.

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Funny story: Wes Welker's Mini-Me Signs on the Dotted Line

Wes Welker's Mini-Me Signs on the Dotted Line

In an offseason when the New England Patriots looked like a gutted fish, they surprised a few free agents by re-signing Julian Edelman. Known as a poor man's Wes Welker, he had a short one game run as the alleged replacement of Welker. By starting...

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Funny story: Gronk Infected but not Contagious

Gronk Infected but not Contagious

With medical and personal privacy no longer in operation among New England fans, inquiring minds are demanding to know whether Rob Gronkowski has become a pariah. Reports from unknown sources are circulating that the big tight end and superstar da...

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