Local technophobe, Martin Shuttlecock, today threatened in no uncertain terms to "take a fucking hammer" to a mobile phone, after a trip into town almost resulted in a bloodbath. Expecting an important call, Shuttlecock agreed to take a mobile pho...
In this age of political correctness and lack of patience for one's fellow man, things seem to have dipped to a new low. Barry Ludlow, 37, a high ranking executive in a city firm, was unceremoniously removed from a train on his way to work last Mo...
The Federal Communications Commissions (FCC) acting in consort with the Democratic National Committee (DNC) have mandated cell phone manufacturers include a special Obama Chip in each new Cell Phone in order for the President to 'stay in touch' in t...
In far-reaching and draconian new legislation soon to be brought in by the Coalition, it can be revealed people who dawdle at the top or bottom of escalators, whilst gawping at their mobile phones, could soon be facing £5000 fines, or in some cases,...
David Brady of Durango, Colorado has been arrested by local authorities for deviant behaviour. The sixteen year old high school student is being held in county jail pending psychiatric evaluation and could be sentenced to time in a state mental hospi...
The Coalition Government are set to announce a major new initiative that is sure to upset millions of iPhone users and texters. Theresa May, Secretary of State for the Home Department, today will announce that all service users in the U.K. will be...
Burnley M.P Gordon Birtwistle has been censored for playing with a children's Mobile in the House of Commons. John Bercow, the Commons Speaker, had to tell the Liberal Democrat MP to put the mobile away and sit down as the rotating leaves and colo...
This world is constantly being tied up with red tape and bureaucracy and even with the simplest, cheapest gadgets (usually made in China, and therefore translated rather badly) come a plethora of instructions that can take weeks to digest before even using new equipment for the first time. Then of course there is the gobbledygook to contend with. For example: I recently bought one of those new...
Government inspectors have condemned over 90% of West Midlands Police Force's cells,sources have claimed. 4,500 of the force's cell phones have been scheduled for immediate replacement as they are "totally inadequate for the needs of a 21st centur...
Daniel Morales, a 58 year old homeless man in New York City, has been reunited with his mobile phone after being separated for 10 years. Morales was one of number of persons who had been participating in a project in the city whereby unfortunates...
Las Vegas NV: Multi Tasking, Orange Computer's CEO, made an announcement today at the Western Electronics Show about his start-up company's first product called the O-Phone. The hand held O-Phone was developed using some of President Obama's stimulus...
Recent reports into the effects of using a mobile phone on the brain were welcomed throughout the world community yesterday. Although slow to admit it, most major mobile phone giants have accepted there is a risk of brain dysfunction over middle...
Hordes of screaming teenage fans and the odd parish priest were disappointed today as they flocked to teenage heartthrob Justin Bieber's website following his announcement of the acquisition of a new penis tone. While many of the girls were hoping...
Boris Johnson is hoping to be able to revamp the capital's mobile phone network before the London Olympics in 2012. A generous Chinese phone technology giant has offered to install new receivers into the London Underground System so that for the f...
The Director of Spain's Emergency Medical Services unveiled the latest communication innovation -- The Life-Saver Phone. Madame Director, Juanita Baracuda, declared that this new device will save thousands of lives annually. "It takes your puls...
PALO ALTO, CA - After news emerged that Nokia would use Microsoft's Windows Phone Seven OS, Nokia has been caught in a scandalous affair. The company, which has arguably made the best handsets in the world since the 90s, and still owns over 70% of...
Sebring, Fla. - A new app available for downloading promises to turn an ordinary cell phone camera into an X-Ray machine that can see through clothing. Invented by thirteen year old Randy Cummings from nearby Titusville, the middle school student sai...
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