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Funny satire stories about John Terry

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Funny story: John Terry And Steven Gerrard To Holiday Together In Benidorm In Bonding Exercise

John Terry And Steven Gerrard To Holiday Together In Benidorm In Bonding Exercise

Unreliable sources reliably inform us unreliably that John Terry and Steven Gerrard are to holiday together in Benidorm with their respective partners in a teambuilding cum bonding exercise - following England's monumental World Cup fuck up, which th...

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Funny story: John Terry Revealed As German Sleeper Agent "I'm Gonna Win For Ze Fatherland"

John Terry Revealed As German Sleeper Agent "I'm Gonna Win For Ze Fatherland"

The penny finally drops. We've known for a while that John Terry's recent erratic behaviour was perhaps part of a larger plan but only now can we truly appreciate the gravity of the situation. He's repeatedly mounted his team mate Wayne Bridge's...

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Funny story: Capello v Terry Round One Report

Capello v Terry Round One Report

England's former captain, John Terry, has made a strong start in the World Cup Heavyweight Contest between Fabio Capello, Mafia boss of England's team and himself. Round one was scored to Terry on points by the three referees, two were linesmen bu...

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Funny story: England And The United States Tie 1-1 in World Cup Play - Queen Elizabeth Wants To Talk To Goalkeeper Robert Green #12

England And The United States Tie 1-1 in World Cup Play - Queen Elizabeth Wants To Talk To Goalkeeper Robert Green #12

RUSTENBERG, South Africa - Royalistic Sand Grouse Stadium was the sight of one of the most anticipated World Cup games of the 2010 FIFA World Cup Finals. The Three Lions from Britain were pitted against The Three Tigers from The USA. And when the...

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Funny story: Pristine clean John Terry and Ashley Cole scoop the "Double"

Pristine clean John Terry and Ashley Cole scoop the "Double"

Chelsea scandal pair, John Terry and Ashley Cole have scooped the "Double" in 2010. A master performance was required from both of them and the soccer world is now a better, cleaner place, in fact they have both been recommended as ambassadors for...

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Funny story: John Terry's in the News again

John Terry's in the News again

John Terry's in the News again thanks to his dad. As if the Chelsea and England footballer didn't have enough to contend with, now his father's becoming a bit of an embarrassment. Terry's dad is up on drug charges. If this is an example of o...

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Funny story: John Terry's Dad Admits "My Son Is A Footballer"

John Terry's Dad Admits "My Son Is A Footballer"

Woking Crown Court heard today that Edward Terry admitted being the father of a footballer. Terry, 56, admitted supplying the world with a center half and is expected to be found guilty. He faces a maximum sentence of seven years as a season ticket h...

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Funny story: South African Rubber Producers Brace Themselves For English Invasion

South African Rubber Producers Brace Themselves For English Invasion

South African rubber producers are said to be "shit scared" of the impending arrival of the England World Cup Squad. Spokesman Thabo M'Johnnie said "We just don't know if we will be able to keep up with the demand. John Terry and Ashley Cole on the l...

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Funny story: John Terry and Ashley Cole shortlisted for PFA award

John Terry and Ashley Cole shortlisted for PFA award

Chelsea stars John Terry and Ashley Cole are among four players shortlisted for this year's PFA award. Not the Professional Footballer's Association player of the year award, but the Professional Fucking Around performance of the year award. John...

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Funny story: John Terry's dad takes the spotlight off his son

John Terry's dad takes the spotlight off his son

Ted Terry, father of John 'naughty boy' Terry has been charged with possession of a class A drug. Cocaine. Perhaps this is a fatherly gesture aimed at taking the spotlight off his 'playing away from home' famous son, for a while at least. It...

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Funny story: JT Can't Keep the Gnome Fires Burning Like Rio

JT Can't Keep the Gnome Fires Burning Like Rio

Love rat and former England and Chelsea statue John Terry has failed miserably to take a leaf out of Rio Ferdinand's book on happy families, writes Virginia Ratpoison. Ferdinand recently bought four garden gnomes for his Cheshire mansion, and had...

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Funny story: Chocolate-Smeared Hugh Grant Is Demanding Chocolate Cake At 50 Paces

Chocolate-Smeared Hugh Grant Is Demanding Chocolate Cake At 50 Paces

LONDON - Public Relations Guru Matthew Freud, no relation to the Lloyd Freud family of West Wickham, took the old Ukrainian phrase 'Let them eat chocolate cake' quite literally. The two British chaps were at London's Annabel's Nightclub celebratin...

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Funny story: John Terry In Car Park Accident

John Terry In Car Park Accident

National hero and all round good guy, John Terry, has been helping police with their inquiries, and may be forced to miss the World Cup, following allegations by Katie Price that he ran her over in his Rage Rover. The reported incident occurred as...

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Funny story: John Terry car prang: no golf clubs, hedges, trees, fire hydrants or prescription meds involved!

John Terry car prang: no golf clubs, hedges, trees, fire hydrants or prescription meds involved!

London - (4X4 Mess): Was something - or someone? - on John Terry's mind last night when he accidentally ran over a Stamford Bridge security guard while enroute home to Surrey? Tabloid pics today show ashen-faced wife Toni gobsmacked as her Chelsea...

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Funny story: John Terry - True sportsman

John Terry - True sportsman

John Terry answered his critics last night with a sterling show of sportsmanship following Chelsea's Champions League exit. English hearts once again swelled with pride as the role model insisted on voraciously congratulating all four match offici...

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Funny story: Bad Boy Tiger plays St Andrews

Bad Boy Tiger plays St Andrews

Freed from their sex therapy clinic near St Andrews, Scotland the bad boys, Terry, Cole, Wood and Owens are having a rare day out at the home of golf, St Andrews. Things did not begin well as Tiger was banned from the posh locker room by the up th...

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Funny story: Billionairess Nicole Sconciaforni 'set up' John Terry

Billionairess Nicole Sconciaforni 'set up' John Terry

Billionairess, Nicole Sconiaforni is a bitter, bitter woman. John Terry making a play for her? Who is she trying to kid? After reportedly spending over SIX THOUSAND POUNDS on booze the night in question, a witness came forward saying that Nicole...

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