Portimao - (Slitherin): JK Rowling's raven-haired, doe-eyed sixteen year-old daughter has lashed out at her Mum's legendary control freakery. Jessica Rowling Arantes, holidaying with her father Jorge's family in the Algarve, says her Pa is skint a...
London - (Rotters): Hidden cold war files at the National Archive in Kew may hold the secrets of JK Rowling's nativity according to latest reports. The serial children's book plagiarist had previously been assumed to be Anne 'Weakest Link' Robinso...
London - Bafta audiences were nauseated to learn that serial children's fiction plagiarist JK Rowling has been groomed for stardom by her maternal grandmother, fetid KGB Vanessa Redgrave. The geriatric thespian spoke for about 10 minutes on Sunday...
Talks opened yesterday between representatives of the world's best selling authors, JK Rowling and Stephanie Meyer hoping to give the green light to a collaborative writing endeavour which will shake the literary world to its foundations. The crea...
London - (Philosphers Stoned): Serial children's fiction plagiarist JK Rowling has been named the most entertaining security intelligence diversion of the decade according to a Pole in today's Daily Broadshiite. A Mr Lech Walesa II is quoted as sa...
Edinbgurgh - (Philosophers Stoned): Serial children's fiction plagiarist JK Rowling has come out as the real Belle de Jour genius impersonated by Dr Brooke Magnanti. Rowling said today she is the iconic blog's 'immensely successful, pseudonymous...
London - (Smoke 'N' Mirrors): A covert operation by British security intelligence trailing children's fiction hoaxer JK Rowling has inadvertantly stumbled on Iran's secret second nuclear plant. The Qom site was unearthed after Rowling was caught p...
London UK: Top selling authoress J.K. Rowling today announced a new film which hopefully will please plenty of minority groups around the world. The new film 'Harry Patel and the Single Parent of Four Mixed Race Disabled Adopted Children' heralds...
London - (7/7 Bombings Mess): IRA/Al Qaeda terrorist JK Rowling has enjoyed lifetime protection from criminal arrest because former MI6 CEO Sir Richard Queerlove is her father a Joint Intelligence Committe meeting heard today. The secret JIC confe...
London - (Rioters): Tuesday's world premiere of Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince will take place under the wickedly deceptive forces of the eclipsed Capricorn full moon, children's stories hoaxer JK Rowling has been warned. The former IRA...
J.K. Rowling, during a series of press conferences yesterday, declared that she would be writing an eighth book in a series of seven Harry Potter books. Rowling initially said, shortly after the 7th came out, that no more were to be had (much to...
Who would have thought that JK Rowling would follow up her last Harry Potter Book "Harry Potter stark bollock naked and a horse" with a blockbuster of a biography about Mohamed Al Fayed's Cheuffeur Henri Paul? At a packed venue in New York the gre...
Harry Potter authoress Joanne (JK) Rowling was today condemned to death by the Spanish Inquisition. Issuing the condemnation, the leader of the Inquisition, Joseph (HH) Ratzinger, said: 'Ja, Miss Rowling has been found guilty of spreading heresy,...
Christopher Tolkien son of Lord Of The Rings author J.R.R.Tolkien has hit out at some media claims that the Gandalf character is Gay. Speculation about the wizards sexuality increased following JK Rowling's announcement that Professor Dumbledore...
Harry Potter, the JK Rowling creation, is to become the new Labour Minister for Magic, after the authoress made a huge £1million donation to party funds on Friday. Potter is a little lad magician, and prone to performing magic spells, something Pr...
London - (Cover-up Mess): Serial children's story thief JK Rowling has given Prime Monster Gorgon Brown a £1m bung. The backhander follows a lot of No 10 whinging about the credit crunch affecting the price of perverting the course of justice thes...
London - (Ass mess): Whitehall mandarins are said to be rattled-as-hell after a newpaper revealed that Gustav - the eponymous (sic) Caribbean storm - is MI5's secret codename for Al-QaEda/Mossad double agent, a.k.a J K Rowling. The Scottish childr...
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