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Funny story: FDA Warns Botox Causes Infection and Death

FDA Warns Botox Causes Infection and Death

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The FDA has announced that after intensive investigations it has determined that Botox injections lead to infection and death.

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Funny story: FDA Declares Fingernails Protein in School Lunches

FDA Declares Fingernails Protein in School Lunches

During the Reagan Administration, ketchup on hamburgers was officially declared a vegetable. In the Clinton years, corn chips with cheese sauce and pinto beans (nachos) became acceptable in school lunch programs as a main dish, fulling grain, dairy,...

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Funny story: Doomsday Vault opens

Doomsday Vault opens

Norway made world news recently with the opening of a Doomsday Vault close to the North Pole to safeguard seed stocks that haven't been genetically modified.

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Funny story: FDA Bans Placebos

FDA Bans Placebos

WASHINGTON, DC -- The Food and Drug Administration shocked the medical community today by announcing the banning of placebos in medical testing.

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Funny story: FDA Says Chocolate is a Vitamin

FDA Says Chocolate is a Vitamin

(Washington) - The FDA today announced that it has reclassified chocolate as a vitamin.

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Funny story: The Secret Poisons Hidden In Your Vitamins

The Secret Poisons Hidden In Your Vitamins

Do you take daily multivitamin supplements to better your health? What about your kids? Well, chances are you and your kids may be intaking the same deadly poisons found in cigarettes.

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Funny story: FDA To Outlaw Testing Toys For Lead

FDA To Outlaw Testing Toys For Lead

Washington DC (IP) - The Food and Drug Administration, acting on behalf of corporate America, will outlaw the testing of toys for lead content. They are also going to prohibit the testing of any food that makes it into the United States. Raids are...

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Funny story: Cure for everything discovered; banned

Cure for everything discovered; banned

A US Appeals court sided with several major pharmaceutical manufacturers and the US FDA today in denying a Kentucky man the right to patent or market a product he claims will cure most illnesses, including Aids, heart disease and cancer with no negat...

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Funny story: FDA orders recall of 'Veggie Booty' children's snacks; may cause gastrointestinal illness

FDA orders recall of 'Veggie Booty' children's snacks; may cause gastrointestinal illness

Washington, D.C. - The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) finally took action against the makers of the Booty line healthy food snacks with the obscene, offensive, and sexually suggestive names, according to conservative family value groups.

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Funny story: FDA approves clinical trial using Ecstacy-like drug

FDA approves clinical trial using Ecstacy-like drug

Psychiatrists at the University of Maryland have received FDA approval to begin clinical trials using a drug similar to MDMA, or Ecstacy as it is commonly known, for marriage counseling.

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Funny story: FDA Bans Sugar

FDA Bans Sugar

The US Food and Drug Administration banned sugar today in an effort to stop the spread of diabetes and other illnesses related to simple carbohydrates. The ban, effective August 1, 2007, covers table sugar as well as a variety of sugar-related produc...

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Funny story: Angry Peckers To Sue Government

Angry Peckers To Sue Government

APPLEBY, NC--It was just another feast in the life of a chicken; or so thought the future finger-licking-good fowl at various U.S. based chicken farms. But when reports that the food they were eating may have been contaminated came to light last mon...

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Funny story: FDA Releases Suicide Pills

FDA Releases Suicide Pills

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - The FDA gave the O.K. to "Suicide Pills" today. Many anti-depressants cause suicidal thoughts and actions, especially in younger adults. The "Suicide Pills" are a new push by the Bush Ad...

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Funny story: FDA Warns Public Against Deadly Poison Aspartame

FDA Warns Public Against Deadly Poison Aspartame

WASHINGTON (AP) - FDA Chief Ralph Roachman has warned the American public "against eating Aspartame or getting any on your hands," the distinguished bureaucrat cautioned at a news conference.

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Funny story: FDA Certifies GM Corn As Rat Poison

FDA Certifies GM Corn As Rat Poison

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The US FDA on Wednesday certified that Monsanto's Genetically Modified (GM) corn MON863 is an "excellent" rat poison since FDA studies show that it causes kidney and liver toxicity in animal studies.

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Funny story: FDA Approves Treatment for March Madness

FDA Approves Treatment for March Madness

Asslete Pharmaceuticals announced today that the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has approved Vitalecillin® (vitale baldinate) for the treatment of patients with March Madness Disorder...

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Funny story: FDA Finds Bees Dying from Genetically Modified Crops, Pollens

FDA Finds Bees Dying from Genetically Modified Crops, Pollens

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The die-off of bee populations throughout the world is being caused by genetically modified crops, FDA chief Ralph Roachman announced on Friday.

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