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Funny satire stories about Health

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Funny story: HHS Requires Hospital Accreditation to Depend on Faith-Based Healing

HHS Requires Hospital Accreditation to Depend on Faith-Based Healing

Washington, DC--The Department of Health and Human Services, acting on instructions from the Bush Administration, today dissolved the JCAHO and the NCQA and instead instituted a faith-based system of accreditation for hospitals and healthcare profess...

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Funny story: Vioxx scare hits healthcare costs

Vioxx scare hits healthcare costs

Further fallout from the Vioxx health scare today hit the headlines as it emerged that the withdrawal of the drug may have a huge and previously unforseen impact on the federal health budget.

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Funny story: Geriatric Foreplay

Geriatric Foreplay

Let me begin by saying I have a wonderful, thoughtful, kind and considerate, husband whom I adore. I am a woman pushing sixty with a few health problems, and my dear husband asks me how I feel every single day. A while ago I noticed there were certain days when he asked how I was feeling four or five times in the space of an hour. Initially this perplexed me, but I eventually figured it o...

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Funny story: Pope Idol 2005

Pope Idol 2005

With the hints made by the Vatican today of the potential retirement of Pope John Paul due to his numerous health problems, the council...

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Funny story: George Bush Health Scare

George Bush Health Scare

WASHINGTON (AP) President George W. Bush was taken to Walter Reed Army Medical Center today just after his staff finished the morning news briefing. The president was listening to Karl Rove read the main headlines in USA Today - the only paper Mr. Bu...

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Funny story: Bush Unveils New Initiatives Designed To Promote Self-Reliance and Increased Height

Bush Unveils New Initiatives Designed To Promote Self-Reliance and Increased Height

Washington, DC--Building upon his belief that Americans need to assume more responsibility for all aspects of their health, financial security, and overall well-being, as well as reminiscing with nostalgia about his youthful comment that poor people...

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Funny story: Cabin Fever Devastating to NHL Players

Cabin Fever Devastating to NHL Players

TORONTO, CANADA - As the lockout of National Hockey League (NHL) players reached its 117th day (January 10), the Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA) blamed out-of-work hockey players for a disturbing spike in cabin fever-related incidents. Acco...

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Funny story: George W. Bush Made Me a Fundamentalist Christian

George W. Bush Made Me a Fundamentalist Christian

Well, the elections are over and I've been thinking: 51% of the voting public must be onto something that I've been missing. All this time I'm thinking that illegal and unnecessary wars, negative job growth, tens of millions without health insurance...

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Funny story: Arafat Announces Successor

Arafat Announces Successor

As his health suffered a further setback today, Yasser Arafat announced whom he wishes to take over his role in the event of his demise.

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Funny story: Tom DeLay Accused of Unethical Behavior: What a Shock

Tom DeLay Accused of Unethical Behavior: What a Shock

Republican House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, rebuked by a House Ethics Committee at the end of September for pressuring a fellow member of the House of Representatives to switch his vote on a health care bill, may soon face more serious charges if the...

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Funny story: Bush Administration Vows To Offer National Health Insurance To Other Nations

Bush Administration Vows To Offer National Health Insurance To Other Nations

Washington, DC, and Crawford, TX--President Bush today confirmed that if re-elected, he will offer government-sponsored health care coverage to all other nations who do not currently have national health insurance for their citizens, but his Administ...

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Funny story: English Pubs Introduce Compulsory Ugliness

English Pubs Introduce Compulsory Ugliness

Health Secretary Dr John Reid is to introduce a bill in parliament making it compulsory for less attractive women to attend their local pub every evening. The bill is in response to pub landlords who believe that far more product is consumed when men...

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Funny story: Bush Administration Offers Vouchers to Middle Class Citizens Seeking To Flee

Bush Administration Offers Vouchers to Middle Class Citizens Seeking To Flee

Washington, DC--President George W. Bush today outlined his proposal to give vouchers to middle-class Americans seeking jobs, job security, affordable health care, and the promise of an eventual retirement that does not include sleeping on the street...

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Funny story: Five-in-one Baby Jab Safe

Five-in-one Baby Jab Safe

British health officials say that they are unmoved by the bruhaha in the media and among interest groups regarding the new 5-in-1 jab. A spokesman says that like the 3-in-1 they will look to experts abroad rather than hysterical doctors.

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Funny story: Artistry Eludes Me

Artistry Eludes Me

I always figured that someone with a healthy life, a good set of friends, or a stable family wouldn’t be able to become an artist. My theory was based on Van Gough’s ear, Picasso’s blueness, and Frida Kahlo’s broken back. Health, family, AND friendships all had to be faltering in order for your artistry to materialize. It was clear to me that if I ever wanted to accomplish being an artist I had to...

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Funny story: Capitol Hill Named Nation's Clap Capital

Capitol Hill Named Nation's Clap Capital

Washington, DC - Public health experts and beltway spin doctors are trying to understand and explain why the gonorrhea rate among the nation's legislators, their staff and aides is over twelve-times the rate for the general population.

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Funny story: Rummy Still Suffering "South of the Border"

Rummy Still Suffering "South of the Border"

Bethesda, MD - Earlier this month, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was given a clean bill of health by Dr. Jeremy North at the Bethesda Medical Center following a prostrate cancer scare. However, all is not well in Mr. Rumsfeld's nether regions...

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