Gordon Brown is expected to complete his ministerial reshuffle later, with New Labour's notorious Scandal Kid, Peter (watch yer arses) Mandelson, returning to the cabinet as head of the Ministry of Corruption, which is to be relocated to the Millenni...
Signs of Gordon Brown's desperation and increasing distance from reality have appeared today when he announced his latest cabinet reshuffle, a reshuffle which includes the mouldering corpse of Karl Marx, dead for over a century. In what is seen as...
London - (Saggy Ass Mess): The fetid love-child of Princess Margaret and Ronald Reagan has been invited to take up his rightful seat in the House of Lords as a cross-bencher on the Real IRA side of the upper house. Peter Mandelson, 69, is a former...
Following the recent resurgence in the nation's love for all things shamelessly 80s, Prime Minister Gordon Brown has unveiled a shocking new policy in order to gain popularity among the public. The Prime Minister's aids had been warning Mr Brown...
The National Farmers Union is taking the Speaker of the House of Commons to the European Court on two counts. Firstly, they are questioning why he is called the speaker when he never actually makes a speech. And secondly, and more importantly,...
Today the "Government" has introduced collectable cigarette packets for the first time, following the success of packets with written warnings of impending doom such as, "smoking kills." The new, more colourful, packets will have pictures of cripp...
After months of terrible news, financial disasters, housing and employment crises and an increase in gun and knife crime, there was a fantastic surprise today for everyone living in Britain when the hated Council Tax was abolished. The bolt out of...
Alastair Darling was disappointed when his plan to revive the UK economy failed late on Friday. "I had 4 numbers on the Euromillions and 1 lucky star." said Alastair. "If I had got the other main number and another lucky star we'd have been laughi...
After it being announced at the Labour Party Conference that poor children would have free internet at home the Tory party have hit back. They are disgusted that poor children will be given free access to the internet as this could help them to le...
London - Thought balloons mysteriously appeared over the heads of Members of Parliament last week in the House of Commons disrupting proceedings. Speaker Michael Martin was at a loss as to how to proceed as protocols are largely based on speaking, no...
Harry Potter, the JK Rowling creation, is to become the new Labour Minister for Magic, after the authoress made a huge £1million donation to party funds on Friday. Potter is a little lad magician, and prone to performing magic spells, something Pr...
Plans are being put in place for a dissolution of the Labour-led British government, and the formation of an emergency committee to run the country led by TV funnymen, the Chuckle Brothers. Barry and Paul Elliot, of Rotherham, are two comedians be...
Gordon Brown sacked himself from his post as Prime Minister of Great Britain today in a showing of solidarity with Labour party rebels who argue that he should resign. Brown wholeheartedly supported calls for himself to be let go as Labour party...
Prime Minister Gordon Brown has shocked the nation by firing himself, following allegations that he was ready to move against him. According to a source close to the PM, Mr Brown suffered a moment of self-doubt on Sunday morning whilst having a shit...
As the Lib Dem conference gets underway in Bournemouth, a number of backbench MPs are mounting a challenge to Nick Clegg's leadership with a campaign to draft the legendary David Lloyd George back into office to replace him. Despite the fact that th...
It was revealed today that the Labour Party are preparing to announce the leadership battle that has long been anticipated. David Milliband and Gordon Brown will participate in jousting, crossbow target shooting and broad sword fighting to decide...
Self extinguishing cigarettes that go out in 60 seconds if they are not smoked will become compulsory across Europe within three years. A new EU ruling will force tobacco companies to use fire retardant paper in all cigarettes by 2011 in a bid to cut...
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