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Funny satire stories about Virgin (Sexual)

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Funny story: DVD Menu Loops During Loss Of Virginity

DVD Menu Loops During Loss Of Virginity

Kristen Stabler and Ryan Hokum, both of Havertown, Maryland, engaged in their first coital act together Saturday night while the menu of the DVD they had been watching looped continuously. The DVD in question, Star Wars, Episode IV: A New Ho...

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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth a Virgin

Queen Elizabeth a Virgin

It has been claimed that Queen Elizabeth 2 is a virgin queen. For some time there have been rumours but it is only now that relevant documents have been made available. It is believed that Prince Philip tried to consummate the marriage, but it was...

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Funny story: 99.9999999999 Percent of Brides NOT Virgins!

99.9999999999 Percent of Brides NOT Virgins!

After a huge World survey was performed out of Boston, Massachusetts, it's been found that 99.9999999999 percent of brides have engaged in sexual intercourse before marriage. The revelation came as a shocker to the billion or so people in the wo...

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Funny story: Economic Downturn Hits Al Queda-Pension Funds At Risk-Virgins Cut

Economic Downturn Hits Al Queda-Pension Funds At Risk-Virgins Cut

In yet another sign of just how deep the global economic downturn has become, Al Queda announced today that it's Jihadi Retirement Fund may not be able to meet it's obligations in the near term. The JRF's chief financial officer acknowledged tha...

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Funny story: Virgins Assassinated

Virgins Assassinated

Vatican - Religious officials announced the end of terrorism by fanatical Muslims when 3 members of the Christian Secret Service managed to penetrate, and assassinate the 72 Virgins in Heaven awaiting Muslims upon their death. When news of the pe...

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Funny story: Nation's Last Virgin Is Weakening

Nation's Last Virgin Is Weakening

Gertrude Spotsinsky, the United States' last known virgin over the age of 13, confided in her best friend that she was "weakening" this past Tuesday. "It's hard to resist Mark," she explained, with a faraway look in her eye, "He knows the words to...

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Funny story: Suicide Virgins not what they seem

Suicide Virgins not what they seem

In Israel today Ahmed Al Mahed was resuscitated after a suicide bomb attack in Jerusalem and questioned by police. He had some dramatic news for other would-be suicide bombers. After the bombing, Al Mahed was clinically dead for ten minutes before...

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Funny story: French 'Virgin' Ruling Reversed on Appeal

French 'Virgin' Ruling Reversed on Appeal

A French court of appeal has overruled the decision to annul the marriage of two Muslims because the bride had lied about being a virgin. Fatima Ras al-Slapper had married Ratchit al Haj bin Wankin in a Kandahar-style Muslim wedding ceremony in t...

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Funny story: The 40 Year Old Virgin (+50 Years)

The 40 Year Old Virgin (+50 Years)

We've all heard that some people keep their self pure until marriage. But one Thaddeus B. Jerkwell takes that to a whole other level. Mr. Jerkwell is ninety years old. In the small town of Winchester, Kansas where everyone and their Mum's have a...

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Funny story: 105 Year Old Nazi "Virgin" Was Hitlers Lover

105 Year Old Nazi "Virgin" Was Hitlers Lover

Clara Meadmore the "105 year old virgin" has been exposed as Eva Braun, the former lover of all round Nazi fruit loop Adolf Hitler. In an exclusive we can reveal today that Meadmore who has actually resided in the UK since late 1945 after the stag...

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Funny story: Second Shark Experiences Virgin Birth - Palin's Future Son-in-law Suspected!

Second Shark Experiences Virgin Birth - Palin's Future Son-in-law Suspected!

Omaha, Nebraska was the site of the first known Shark pathenogenesis or virgin birth. There a hammerhead female who had never been in a tank with a male in her life (or so she said...) Now another miracle birth has occurred in Virginia. An Atlantic B...

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Funny story: 105-Year-Old Virgin Invites Man Around For 'A Cup Of Tea'

105-Year-Old Virgin Invites Man Around For 'A Cup Of Tea'

BRITAIN'S oldest virgin who celebrated her 105th birthday this weekend says that, despite the secret to her long life being No Sex, she had decided to invite a man around on her big day. Purple Clara Meadmore, who looks 'not a day over 102', sa...

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Funny story: Virgin Birth Confirmed: DNA Testing

Virgin Birth Confirmed: DNA Testing

Virgin birth has been confirmed. Scientists in Virginia used DNA testing to establish that a female managed to carry a fetus without any exposure to males. The pregnant female, known by the code name Tidbit, died under routine circumstances, and a...

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Funny story: Vaginal Cosmetic Surgery On The Increase

Vaginal Cosmetic Surgery On The Increase

Designer cosmetic surgery has come a long way since facelifts started it all way back in the fashion-conscious 1970s, but today's women have more on their minds than what their faces look like - they want their vaginas looking their best as well!...

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Funny story: Sarah Palin Gave Virgin Birth to All of Her Many Children and Grandchildren!

Sarah Palin Gave Virgin Birth to All of Her Many Children and Grandchildren!

Mary the Mother of God or a Jewish pregnant teen with a great alibi is thought to be the only human to have experienced a virgin birth. Parthenogenesis has been observed in certain frogs but never in a human woman who has given birth five times.

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Funny story: Strawberry Shortcake Breaks her Cherry!

Strawberry Shortcake Breaks her Cherry!

1980's cartoon character Strawberry Shortcake has fallen victim to the Puritanizing of America.

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Funny story: The ONLY Virgin in France Lied!

The ONLY Virgin in France Lied!

French media is exploding with the story of a Muslim couple in Paris who are in the midst of divorce proceeding because the young bride lied to her husband about her virginity.

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