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Funny satire stories about University

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Funny story: Top University to Close Down

Top University to Close Down

The self styled "top" University of Buckingham is to close its doors for the very final time at Easter 2012. Vice Chancellor and general know-it-all Dr Terence Kealey explained: "We've been quietly ripping idiot folk off for years but now that r...

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Funny story: Egyptians celebrate new discovery

Egyptians celebrate new discovery

Egyptian scientists have found that a Camel's toe can actually be used as an aphrodisiac. The discovery was made by three University undergraduates who had stolen their local University rivals football mascot. On getting the camel home they embar...

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Funny story: Penn State University Has Decided To Change Its Name In Order To Get Rid of The Coach Jerry Sandusky Stigma

Penn State University Has Decided To Change Its Name In Order To Get Rid of The Coach Jerry Sandusky Stigma

UNIVERSITY PARK, Pennsylvania - In a collegiate move that has surprised 91 percent of the Penn State faculty and 93 percent of the Penn State student body, school administrators have moved to change the university's name. Penn State spokesperson...

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Funny story: Penn State University In An Effort To Combat All of The Recent Bad Publicity Lowers It's Semester Tuition Fee to $7

Penn State University In An Effort To Combat All of The Recent Bad Publicity Lowers It's Semester Tuition Fee to $7

UNIVERSITY PARK, Pennsylvania - It is no secret that the University of Penn State has really taken a beating in the media lately due to the countless alleged unbelievable actions of former football coach Jerry Sandusky. And on top of those allegat...

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Funny story: Penn State Requests Jerry Sandusky To Not Wear Penn State "Sweats" When Being Arrested

Penn State Requests Jerry Sandusky To Not Wear Penn State "Sweats" When Being Arrested

The Board of Trustees of Pennsylvania State University has unanimously passed a resolution to ask Jerry Sandusky to please stop wearing Penn State sweat suits every time he gets arrested. It was at a Happy Valley news conference that Peter Fillia, C...

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Funny story: Ex-Penn State Football Coach Jerry Sandusky Emailed Officer John 'Pepper Spray' Pike Saying "Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!"

Ex-Penn State Football Coach Jerry Sandusky Emailed Officer John 'Pepper Spray' Pike Saying "Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!"

UNIVERSITY PARK, Pennsylvania - Members of the news media are reporting that for the first time in over a week, the former defensive coach of Penn State University Jerry Sandusky has managed to smile. According to Sports Territory Magazine Sandusk...

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Funny story: Applications for worthless bits of paper, down 9% according to Universities

Applications for worthless bits of paper, down 9% according to Universities

Applications by college leavers seeking to acquire a worthless piece of paper confirming they too had successfully been exploited for three years of their lives at University, are running at 9% below last year's level, says the Ucas admissions servic...

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Funny story: David Starkey Misses Out As Controversial Academic Accepts Top Job

David Starkey Misses Out As Controversial Academic Accepts Top Job

TV historian David Starkey was put out of his misery earlier today when controversial colleague Ken Lucid accepted a new job at Hounslow University. The academic community has been waiting with bated breath since earlier this summer when the autho...

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Funny story: Jedward awarded honorary music degree

Jedward awarded honorary music degree

Eastbourne's University at the Municipal Swimming Pool has awarded dancing and singing whatevers (they do neither well) and walking toilet brushes Jedward with honorary degrees in music. 'This is just like, so awesome' said one of the Brothers. 'I...

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Funny story: David Starkey In Limbo As Lucid Considers Hounslow Offer

David Starkey In Limbo As Lucid Considers Hounslow Offer

Broadcaster and historian David Starkey is being made to wait to learn if he is to take over from Ken Lucid at Maidenhead University. Prof Lucid, the controversial head of history at Maidenhead, had only been in the job for a few months by the end...

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Funny story: Oxbridge "discriminates against the thick"

Oxbridge "discriminates against the thick"

A charity for the intellectually challenged called DUH has today released a report showing that less intelligent people are shockingly under-represented at Oxford and Cambridge universities. In 2009, there were a total of 974 sixth-year school pup...

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Funny story: Britain's New Universities Show the Way

Britain's New Universities Show the Way

A press release, made on behalf of Britain's more recent Universities, announced that while the actual degrees from these establishments will not be of any use until the day we run out of Andrex, they are leading the field in providing plausible, if...

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Funny story: First Year Undergraduate goes entire second term without duvet cover

First Year Undergraduate goes entire second term without duvet cover

Following the conclusion of his second term at Westminster University, Duncan Gilmore announced today that he had spent the entire duration of his second term at the institution without a duvet cover. "After I washed it I just could figure out how...

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Funny story: University Degrees Not Worth The Money - Top Academic Hits Back

University Degrees Not Worth The Money - Top Academic Hits Back

A top academic has today launched a scathing attack on middle-class parents who feel that a university degree is no longer worth paying for. Ken Lucid, controversial Head of History at Maidenhead University, described the findings of a new survey...

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Funny story: LSE Fees Announcement Welcomed By Top Academic

LSE Fees Announcement Welcomed By Top Academic

The London School Of Economics has become the first elite university to announce that it will charge less than £9,000 in fees. From the next academic year undergraduates at the LSE will be charged £8,500, a move that the university claims sends "a...

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Funny story: U.K. Study Claims Crossing of Arms Reduces Pain

U.K. Study Claims Crossing of Arms Reduces Pain

Scientists from University College London released a report yesterday that supported the claim that a simple crossing of arms in front of the midsection dramatically reduces the feeling of pain. Supposedly blocking some signals to the brain, the c...

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Funny story: U.K University To Open U.S Campus

U.K University To Open U.S Campus

Warwick University is about to become the first British university to set up a campus in the United States. Its favourite to win a global competition to establish a science campus in New York, despite facing stiff competition from other universiti...

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