WASHINGTON, DC -- Responding to a recent public outcry denouncing American troop involvement in the death of countless numbers of Iraqi civilians, U.S. Secretary of Defense Robert Gates has stated that American troops have never killed a single Iraqi...
In a startling revelation, George Bush appears to be a loyal president. A recent report released by the 51st Congressional Oversight Committee revealed that the Pentagon had 'lost' over 190,000 AK-47's and thousands of other assorted wea...
BAGHDAD (Early Bird News Service) - Just in time for upcoming Fourth of July celebrations, Pentagon officials have announced that the United States will recommence a 'shock-and-awe' bombing campaign in Iraq.
The Pentagon, Saturday - In an altogether shocking display of violence and forcefulness not usually seen by government bureaucrats and with sheer maliciousness equaled only by those in DMV's and the IRS, the Bush administrations intelligence Tsar...
A massive immunisation for measles is about to take place in Iraq... or is it?...
Solar system - (Rotters): The first overwheming proof that the Cosmos has registered its dismay at Earth's global crisis has appeared in a bizarre weather pattern photographed around the ringed planet Saturn, where the Hubble telescope has spotte...
Washington AC/DC: (Rioters): A massive damage limitation excercise is underway at the Pentagon after persistent leaks that George W Bush is a violent, holograpically-generated remote-controlled image modelled on Star Trek Voyager's holodoctor. An...
In what has been hailed as 'a great day for torture' Khalid Sheikh Mohammed has confessed to... well... pretty much everything.
The US, today, breathed a sigh of relief when Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld addressed the nation with the conclusive evidence, collated by the White House Enquiry, on the identity of the aircraft that struck The Pentagon on September 11th...
There was joy unconfined today on the streets of Kentucky's largest city, as news of the state's most famous resident's promotion to General leaked out. Early this morning, in a specially arranged news conference, Major Ed O'Hanlon, CEO and larges...
The office of the Vice President Dick Cheney today announced that the allegations that have surfaced in some sections of the media claiming that the Vice President played the super villain known as The Penguin in the 60's TV series of Batman are...
BAGHDAD - The Defense Department has recruited hundreds of American carnival "geeks" to instill courage in the fledgling Iraqi Army, according to U.S. military sources.
LOS ANGELES (UPI) - Senior officers in the Pentagon and in the Bush Administration have "finally achieved orgasm" as an interceptor missile successfully destroyed a mock warhead over the Pacific Ocean on Friday in a test of the missile-defence system...
YOKOTA AIR BASE, Japan -- Soldiers taking the Patriot Express and other military hops face more restrictions than those applied to commercial flights in the United States and other countries following the terrorist threat in the United Kingdom, a Yok...
THE PENTAGON-Colonel "Bull" Buntline of the Pentagon announced on Thursday that national security has successfully been undermined by Pentagon bureaucracy which promotes cost overruns and delays in the development of complex new weapons systems for U...
Rummy caught leaking!...
WASHINGTON D.C. Burried in a recently passed $419 Billion defense authorization bill, analysts have found an outlay for $1 billion for a HandyTools household hammer. The hammer, which is needed to pound in some nails, in the oilfields of Ira...
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