Albuquerque, New Mexico - In what Sheriff Deputies called "a scene reminiscent of frontier vigilante justice," an Albuquerque area magician was treed by a drunken mob that took exception to his act. Performing at an airport Ramada Inn, the magicia...
Baltimore - First Lady Michelle Obama escorted a group of mostly Hispanic, non-English speaking kids to a ghetto community garden on the first leg of her month long "Garden Organic Now America!" tour, where she told them "organic gardening teaches th...
It turns out that having a massive penis is not the umitigated blessing most men aged 8 through 80 think it to be. Though it may boost mightily one's self-esteem, a recent research study says it can be quite hard on the pocketbook. In a paper tit...
The Vatican well known for it's lofty metaphysical discussions about the meaning of life like whether children will go to hell for masturbating and if women's orgasm are sinful and important philosophical quandaries like that - has now turned to deep...
RAF Lossiemouth confirmed to the The Daily Nettle today, that one of their most daring pilots, Flight Lootenant Wing Commander Flight Captain Viceroy Gordon 'Goose' Maverick, has been carpeted by station big-wigs for the second time in a week, after...
GRANITE PEAK, WHEELING, WV -- An Ohio County man whose morning wood lasts well into the afternoon has prompted the medical community to rethink its definition of the condition. Dr. Fernando Massive, director of Wheeling Hospital's Center for Stiff...
Forget crystal Meth and Marijuana, as they are both easily made or legal here and several other countries, the Mexican Drug Lords are now making most of their money by selling expensive body parts like kidneys and livers. "I can't believe all the...
An extremely eager Spoof writer, determined to increase his points total and spew out yet another ill edited, ill thought off and frankly unfunny spoof news article missed his flight home to Fort Lauderdale after he was too busy compiling an article...
HOLLYWEIRD, CA -- Henrik received a standing ovulation--uh, ovation--when he unveiled the new look of the Academy Award-winning Academy Award trophy, Oscar, which he has "fully restored" to the sculpture's original state, adding the penis that the fi...
A laboratory helper at a Think Tank has stolen the papers there and given another scientist outside a copy of them as the papers were returned. "These are a sure-fire almost magic penis pill directions and those guys in there were just hanging ont...
Forget Levitra, Cialis and Viagra. Try one small $1.00 a pill, "A-Rod for A-Big-Rod!' The suspended Yankee slugger has joined up with a new laboratory in New York City to be their man up front. "If you always wanted to be the big slugger in bed...
It was the most embarrassing thing in the world according to Mrs. Jane Myers of Miami. I realize that I should not be complaining about things, she reportedly told a lifeguard, when the whole south almost, has had a rough winter and here I am taki...
Talk about worrying about the size of your penis, there are people out there who claim their penis disappeared during the night. "It comes back up into your body and you cannot get it out", says a native of West Africa. "It happened to many last y...
About 5 billion years ago, earth came into existence. Some billion years later, life emerged. Additional changes resulted in creation of the first organisms. Next, plants and animals, carnivorous and non-carnivorous, appeared. Then, a new species was born, called Homo sapiens. This odd animal inherited the original traits of the beasts of the world. According to Freud the id, or rather the anim...
ORLANDO, FL - Having grown up as the middle child in a family of six boys, 16-year-old Sammy Beezer has seen his fair share of penises in his day. "We took a lot of showers together to save on hot water. My life's been a regular sausage fest, so...
British gynaecologists warned today that increasing numbers of men, teenage girls and women are undergoing genital cosmetic surgery, driven in part by unrealistic images of how they should look based on pornography and today's freak artists. "I g...
"This happened to a guy in London, England recently and was reported in all the newspapers so I guess this idiot thought it must be some wonderful thing and he winds up needing help also", says Fire Chief Nick Shaft. Shaft was talking about the re...
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