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Funny satire stories about Pat Robertson

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Funny story: 'Jesus Forgives Osama' ignites Pat Robertson

'Jesus Forgives Osama' ignites Pat Robertson

Sydney, Australia - (Rioters): A Sydney baptist church's placard proclaiming that Jesus Forgives Osama has outraged age-defying protein pancake peddler the Reverend Pat Robertson into condemning Antipodean theology as perverted homosexual brainwa...

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Funny story: Fetid orange snow is God's punishment Robertson warns Putin

Fetid orange snow is God's punishment Robertson warns Putin

Virginia Beach - (Rotters): Crusading evangelical preacher and age-defying protein pancake salesman Reverend Pat Robertson has warned Russian President Vlad 'The Impaler' Putin that the foul-smelling orange snow falling on the Omsk region of...

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Funny story: NYC Sanitation Department blames Pat Robertson's Age-Defying Protein Pancakes

NYC Sanitation Department blames Pat Robertson's Age-Defying Protein Pancakes

New York, NY - (Ass mess): The recent foul stench that swept New York has been traced to a collapsed section of 100 year old sewers that criss-cross Lower Manhattan, the Hudson River and all the way to New Jersey. And now angry forensic bacteriologi...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson warned of Yahweh's thunderbolt season

Pat Robertson warned of Yahweh's thunderbolt season

Virginia Beach - (Ass Mess): Age-defying protein pancake peddler and evangelical bigot the Reverend Pat Robertson has once again tempted the derision of Jehovah by terrifying TheoCon TV viewers with his prediction of the killing of millions of Americ...

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Funny story: God Admits Being Drunk While Speaking to Pat Robertson

God Admits Being Drunk While Speaking to Pat Robertson

God admitted today that he was intoxicated when He spoke to evangelical broadcaster Pat Robertson about a "mass killing" to occur in 2007. In a written statement, God apologized and said Robertson was "much too dense" to understa...

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Funny story: Rev. Pat Robertson to Bench Press 2007 Pounds

Rev. Pat Robertson to Bench Press 2007 Pounds

Pat Robertson is accepting the challenge of critics who say that he made up the story that his energy drink, or Jesus Juice if you will, allowed him to bench press 2000 pounds when the best weightlifter in the world can only bench press no more that...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson Embraces Islam

Pat Robertson Embraces Islam

M. G. "Pat" Robertson has achieved national and international recognition as a religious broadcaster, philanthropist, educator, religious leader, businessman, and author. He is the founder and chairman of The Christian Broadcasting Network...

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Funny story: God reveals renewable energy source to Pat Robertson

God reveals renewable energy source to Pat Robertson

In a stunning move that promises to reshape the world energy landscape while simultaneously addressing raging cultural-religious problems, God has revealed a bold new energy plan through his chosen earthly mouthpiece, Pat Robertson.

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Funny story: Osama Bin Robertson?

Osama Bin Robertson?

News peoples around the world were stunned - well, not stunned, but surprised - moderately - by the stunning news from the Justice Department that audio analysis of several audio tapes confirms the rumors - Osama bin Laden and Pat Robertson are the s...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson Explodes after Brokeback Mountain wins Golden Globe

Pat Robertson Explodes after Brokeback Mountain wins Golden Globe

Funeral services for Pat Robertson will be held this Friday after the televangelist exploded, witnesses say "in a billion and one pieces" after Denzel Washington announced last night that the Golden Globe winner of best drama was .. Bro...

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Funny story: TBN Duck tapes Pat Robertson's Mouth Shut

TBN Duck tapes Pat Robertson's Mouth Shut

DUCK tape brand, predecessor to "DUCT" brand tape gets the job done and it indeed GOT the job done when TBN officials officially Duck taped Pat Robertson's mouth shut good and tight. TBN said it's on so tight that God Himself can...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson: "I Am Crying For Help"

Pat Robertson: "I Am Crying For Help"

VIRGINIA BEACH - On his 700 Club television show, Pat Robertson told his audience that Israeli Prime Minister's recent massive stroke was divine retribution, stating "I would say woe unto any Prime Minister of Israel who takes a similar course to app...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson: "I Just Baptized Everyone On Mars"

Pat Robertson: "I Just Baptized Everyone On Mars"

VIRGINIA BEACH - On his 700 Club show, Pat Robertson announced that he had "just returned from Mars, where I baptized everyone on the red planet."...

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Funny story: Bush Praises Faith-Based Storm Initiatives

Bush Praises Faith-Based Storm Initiatives

New Orleans - Flanked by a glowing contingent of evangelical supporters, including the Rev. Pat Robertson and Left-Behind Rapture guru Tim Lehaye, President Bush on Thursday unveiled a bold new initiative to help victims of Hurricane Katrina. "...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson Goes to Hell for Threatening Hugo Chavez

Pat Robertson Goes to Hell for Threatening Hugo Chavez

VIRGINIA BEACH, Va (AP)--Viewers watching the 700 Club on TV were confounded on Tuesday when they witnessed TV evangelist Pat Robertson embraced by the Devil and carried bodily off to Hell because of his recent call for the United States Government t...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson calls on God to "Take Jesus Out !"

Pat Robertson calls on God to "Take Jesus Out !"

Pat Robertson, in Tuesday's 700 Club show, concerned that Jesus has not, in Robertson's opinion, done enough to alleviate human suffering or adequately line the collection plates at his 700 Club, asked in prayer for God to "Take Jesus ou...

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Funny story: Pat Robertson Prays, God Smacks Lynyrd Skynyrd

Pat Robertson Prays, God Smacks Lynyrd Skynyrd

Pat Robertson, who has recently prayed away a hurricane and single…um…double-handedly prayed at least one conservative Supreme Court nominee within inches of the Court, had a divine misfire this week and accidentally smote Lynyrd Skynyrd. "I was aimi...

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