SPRINGFIELD, Illinois - The Illinois Senate is getting ready to vote on one of the most talked about bills in recent history. Senator Hayley Martha Tuckerbucker [D-Kankakee] has informed the media that a vote has been scheduled to take place on Mo...
Animal Crackers are animal-shaped cookies (?) designed by carnivorous subhumans as brainwashing tools by which to corrupt innocent children who, without such indoctrination-disguised-as-treats, might become vegetarians, eschewing the abuse of the ver...
HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM, TEXAS - Cheyenna Richards, of Houston, Texas, who admits she's "not all that," nevertheless claims that Jesus frequently joins her in the shower. The former atheist, who now describes herself as "a believer," says that his...
WEST HOLLYWOOD - The Caribbean singer, Rihanna, 25, has just sold The Naked As A Jaybird Nudist Resort which is located just outside of Petaluma on Highway 101. Rihanna purchased the nudist resort in April of this year. She told Margarita Mixx wit...
LOS ANGELES - The ratings for the television series The Vampire Diaries have been very good and they are fixing to get even better. The show's producer Manolo Middlezuck has just announced that an upcoming episode promises to send the ratings thro...
WEST HOLLYWOOD - The star of The Twilight Saga series, Kristen Stewart is said to be feeling very down and depressed about the fact that her career has seemed to hit a fortified brick wall. Stewart recently spoke with Barbara Walters on The View a...
PARIS - France's national news agency Le News Agency has just announced a new French law that will take effect on Tuesday, May 28. Gigi de Maupassant, a reporter for Le News stated that due to the declining number of tourists visiting the world fa...
CHICAGO - In what is being billed as one of the biggest retail mistakes in the history of the retailing business, millions of Britney Spears Bobblehead Dolls are being recalled. Three of the nation's largest retail stores, the Dilly Dally Retail S...
St. Louis - Matt Holiday of the Cardinals announced today that the Cardinals have picked Satan to be the new Pope. While there are no good Catholics on the team, many are well versed in the ways of the Vatican. "We feel Satan best represents the...
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Britney Spears has really seen more than her share of ups and downs lately. The "Oops!...I Did It Again" girl was recently fired from her $15 million a year job as judge on Simon Cowell's X-Factor. And Spears after seeing her...
BEVERLY HILLS - Paris Hilton was in the Haven of Hair Salon getting her split ends taken care of. As she sat in her chair she noticed that there was a copy of her brand new 2013 Paris Hilton Nude Calendar sitting on top of a Cosmopolitan Magazine.
CHICAGO - Last year Lady Gaga was approached by PlayMale Men's Magazine about appearing in a nude layout with a Halloween theme. She turned it down saying that she did not want to be associated with Jack-O-Lanterns and ugly old witches. A repre...
London - US networks have just picked up a fast-breaking British story about a fierce counter-intelligence op underway in London after risqué pics of a naked Prince William and a six foot eight squaddie 'doing what comes naturally' were leaked to the...
SAN FRANCISCO - Christina Aguilera, one of the stars on The Voice, flew to San Francisco to perform a one night concert at The Veni, Vedi, Vici Coliseum. After her performance she spoke backstage with Fajita San Guacamole of Hollywood Innuendo. Sh...
The discovery of the body of Richard III in the Leicester car park has caused consternation in Royal circles as his body was found without any clothes on. Royal authority Kneel Starkers told a press conference outside Crystal Palace that the the...
Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge (Catherine Elizabeth "Kate"; Middleton; born 9 January 1982) the the wife of Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, and a member of the British Royal Family, second in line to the thrones of the 16 Commonwealth realms is...
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. That's been the calling card for Sin City for the last few years. Usually it's the truth, you go to Vegas, party you're ass off and go home, "no harm no foul". Recently though some one broke the sacred code a...
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