In a last ditch, desperate attempt to save England, a speachless Fab-u-loseio Capello has ordered a top Zuid Afrikaans Witch Doctor in to try and rid England of that ancient curse "Loseritis". (translated in perfect Zulu = Spoilt Brat-itis) Jagged...
Emergency talks are being arranged to discuss the wisdom of continually hiring managers from overseas. The quality of players is not in question. Wayne Rooney is undoubtedly world class with a value of at least £50m - which would be higher if he w...
England training Camp, South Africa: Embedded into the England team during the World Cup, our on the spot reporter, has been able to gain access to the latest Fabio Capello hard hitting Tommy Cooper jokes! On the training pitch has told the playe...
England manager Fabio Capello is leaving the England post after the World Cup in South Africa for a make or break career in Hollywood. The 63 year old is in negotiations with the makers of a new biopic documenting the life of Postman Pat and produ...
British Petroleum's CEO, Tony Hayward, knew he was fucked when he accidentally told the truth to a reporter that he wanted his life back. Then all those made-up "fixes" kept not working, now this one sort of works but all of the American southern co...
Critics have blamed England's poor performance in their opening World Cup game against the USA on 'eccentric' training sessions in which the players practice with bricks instead of footballs. The bizarre technique was recently introduced by coach Fab...
RUSTENBERG, South Africa - Royalistic Sand Grouse Stadium was the sight of one of the most anticipated World Cup games of the 2010 FIFA World Cup Finals. The Three Lions from Britain were pitted against The Three Tigers from The USA. And when the...
LONDON - British TV Presenter Kristy Gallacher, who only five months ago had a baby, has graced the glossy pages of PlayGent Magazine. The stunning 34-year-old beauty is one of the best looking lookers in Great Britain's TV presenting business.
Fooball bosses admitted today that "terrible mistakes" had been made when announcing England's final 23 players for the World Cup Finals. Bosses blamed Fabio Capello's inability to communicate effectively in English for the fact that Boris Johnson...
LONDON - Dr. Andy Harland is the designer of the new Adidas Jabulani football that will be used in the World Cup matches. Dr. Andy, as he is called by is wife and most of his kids, said that he actually worked on the football project with a crack...
There was a mixed reaction to England's storming 2-1 victory over Japan in their final warm-up game before the 2010 World Cup yesterday, as the sweet smell of success was tainted by the ghastly aroma of Frank Lampard shitting his pants over his penal...
After taking a seventh minute lead here in Graz in England's final World Cup warm up match, Japan eventually committed ritual hara-kiri by scoring two own goals. Final score: Japan 1 England 2 But boss Fabio Capello was left with a bigger heada...
Italien England manager, Capello has told the FA, the Royal Family and the England fans, "don't expecte mio to singe de national anthem, i italiono et no engleesi, prima verdi!" This statement has caused quite a stir at "stiff upper lip" FA Englan...
Fabio Capello has already named the first member of his world cup squad. He has chosen former Gurkha soldier Hi Kill Foh Mun Lee, who has recently been working in the security business. FA spokesperson Kelly Brook said "Mr Capello was really impre...
London - (Offside Rule): The England coach is mad as hell: someone has recorded his entire World Cup strategy briefing on their mobile. And the bugged plot has found its way into the hands of a debt collector arm of a foreign bank whose existence...
Lady Gaga took part in a woman's soccer match recently and got Ga Ga goals in fact three goals, she scored a hatrick which is probably appropriate for the person with the worlds biggest hat collection. Lady Gaga mad about hats and fish and chips w...
It's his biggest play since the Los Angeles Scorers beat the Cincinnati Crazies in the final of the US Supreme World Series soccer finals earlier this year, but David Beckham is certain he will put in his best ever performance in the big showdown bet...
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