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Funny satire stories about Depression

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Funny story: Leg hair Links To Depression

Leg hair Links To Depression

A study has discovered that the early onset of leg hair in teenage boys is linked with depression in later life. Dr L. John of the Institute for Back, Bum, Leg and Pubic Hair released a short statement. Dropping it from the institutes blimp as it soa...

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Funny story: Mind-Blowing New Study Reveals Link Between Poverty and Depression

Mind-Blowing New Study Reveals Link Between Poverty and Depression

A mind-blowing new study, The Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index, recently revealed a link between poverty and depression, reporting that people living in poverty are actually twice as likely to be depressed as those who are able to provide for their...

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Funny story: Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

While many consider miracles a thing of the past, New York man Kellogg Tracey experiences spiritual magic every single day, courtesy of the "Old River East" - more commonly known as the East River. "That Old River East is a boon to my spirit and...

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Funny story: Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Flint, Michigan - Determined to win back the good name of government, all of the remaining contenders for the presidency have agreed to personally test and evaluate the municipal water supply of this beleaguered city. "How bad can it be?" dema...

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Funny story: Artist Sues Psychiatrist for Curing Wrong Complaint

Artist Sues Psychiatrist for Curing Wrong Complaint

A struggling artist has got Psychiatric Therapists fearing for their livelihood after filing a legal suit for malpractice. In what could be a landmark case, twenty-two year old abstract painter Thomas Dolehead, paints a pretty clear picture of how...

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Funny story: Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Braxton, Mississippi - Henry Johnson Jr., a Mississippi Delta blues singer, was fired from his job at an auto tire shop by his own wife today, who then had sex with another man she hired to replace him. "The other man had no auto tire shop experie...

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Funny story: Drinking Water may trigger Depression

Drinking Water may trigger Depression

Scientists are asking if water, though the purest liquid one can imbibe, may possibly cause brain chemical imbalance, leading to Depression. 'It may even be, that, getting drunk on alcohol is actually better, for maintaining optimism and not actu...

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Funny story: Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Jesus wants people for sunbeams again on an interim basis according to a message received by the Archdeacon of Scunthorpe, Dr. Godfrey Gordon Gustavus Gore. The Archdeacon has a private communication system which he accesses by putting his ear to...

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Funny story: 67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

HARFOLD, Vt. - A study released this week by Harfold State College indicates that at least two out of every three happy Facebook status updates are posted by pathetic sons-of-bitches with miserable lives. Junior Bertrand Russell produced his Faceb...

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Funny story: Elephant No Longer In The Room

Elephant No Longer In The Room

The elephant in the room has taken his own life. He was suffering from clinical depression. He was extremely self-conscious, thinking that he makes others uncomfortable. He was always confused about people's true feelings towards him and he never understood his own place in this world. Sometimes people ignored him and sometimes he was the talk of the room either way no one ever really saw him...

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Funny story: Justin Bieber Is Very Depressed

Justin Bieber Is Very Depressed

NEW YORK CITY - Justin Bieber was in New York visiting the Statue of Liberty. He said that as a young boy growing up in Canada he always dreamed of seeing the big old gal. As he was touring the statue's head he was asked by a reporter how he was f...

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Funny story: How Does Depression Affect You?

How Does Depression Affect You?

Depression runs freely around our great country like the clap around a university campus. 1/3 people will suffer from a mental health issue at some point in their life also 1/3 of us will be affected by cancer. Let's hope it's not the same people or that'll mean 2/6 (if our fractions are correct) of us will be depressed and have a family member suffering from cancer. That would be unlucky. Today w...

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Funny story: Kim Kardashian Explains Why She Has Been Feeling So Depressed Lately

Kim Kardashian Explains Why She Has Been Feeling So Depressed Lately

WEST HOLLYWOOD - Kim Kardashian has it all, fame, money, fancy cars, fancy friends, expensive fancy underwear, and a brand new fancy baby (North West). But lately the most popular member of the Kardashian clan has been very depressed. Tapioca S...

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Funny story: Empire State Building To Be Demolished

Empire State Building To Be Demolished

ARCHITECTURAL DIGEST by Frank Lloyd Wright In the effort to make New York City the most modern of all cosmopolitan urban centers in the world, the Empire State Building is set to be demolished this coming March. Too, the uber modern, Museum...

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Funny story: America, Love It or Leave It says Milton Freeman

America, Love It or Leave It says Milton Freeman

New York - The jobless rate in the U.S. has dipped to a five year low on steady gains. Employers hired at least 200,000 workers in the last four months. President Obama, upon hearing the news, said he was "ecstatic" and that the economy was "stup...

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Funny story: Arizona Has Learned The Reason Why So Many of Its Residents Are Depressed

Arizona Has Learned The Reason Why So Many of Its Residents Are Depressed

PHOENIX - A recent research study report that was put out by The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency of Chicago surprised and shocked many residents of Arizona. The 9-month study reported that the reason why so many Arizona residents are in a state...

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Funny story: Bernanke selling all the stuff he bought on eBay

Bernanke selling all the stuff he bought on eBay

Washington DC - According to anonymous sources close to Bernanke, he is selling all the securities, all the stocks, bonds, realestate, and gold that he purchased with the Federal Reserve System. Why? According to sources, Bernanke is leaving the...

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